Are they gay?

[Datinggame]

New on the scene of dating and met a couple of interesting people. Really working on expanding seeing people who dont necessarily fit my usual type as evidently that hasn't worked.

So seeing someone for only a month, find them attractive, enjoy their company but I would say some of their characteristic are a bit different to what im used to, mainly they are not as masculine. This wasnt really a problem, until last week they said back in their uni days there was a guy or 2 they did find attractive, that they did kiss a guy as a dare but it didnt mean anything, and they are 90 odd% straight but do think sexuality is fluid.

Naturally my mind is now trying to figure out what this means, and if this means they are potentially gay? And how concerned I should be about this

Why are you using “they” pronouns?

Thinking you have the authority over how other people describe their sexuality is not a boundary. Of course you can have the boundary not to date them but why would you go out of your way not to respect how they label themselves?

Yes most bi women I know are only sexual with women in the presence of a man. This is so common among bisexual women that there is a term for it as I have pointed out. I'm not backtracking on anything. Women in a bar making out for a male crowd isn't new.

That behaviour doesn't help stigma around bisexuality.

Someone is bi if they say they are and definitely if they are engaging in same sex activity. You'd never let a man who kisses other men and more get away with calling himself straight.

this thread and the biphobia is very depressing

Honestly it's so typical of Mumsnet it's not worth getting upset about, it's not even useful on a thread like this, it's just the same old bigotry.
As for the op, the fact he's able to open up to you about his past would be a huge green flag for me!

I know this is my 5th post on this thread but to quote a famous actor:

"Don't Criticize What You Don't Understand Son, Because You Never Walked in That Man's Shoes"

Let the OP, make her own decision now.
He sounds like a genuine guy to me. ❤️❤️

I wouldn’t bother with him. Throw this one back. Life’s too short to be messing around with people who have identity problem and are somewhat focussed on themselves.

Look elsewhere for partners. Diversify your own interests to draw people to you. Join clubs, the church, volunteer, take up a hobby.
When you’re searching for fulfilment you attract the wrong characters because you appear needy.