Sick to death of being alone every Saturday night

[Ghlp]

Long term boyfriend spends every Saturday night in the pub. I would like to see him the odd Saturday!

So why don't you join him at the pub?

Deleted wrong thread

He doesn’t love you though does he? So why stay in a pick me low effort relationship with a man who treats you like a doormat that doesnt make you happy? Does he want sex the 1/2 times a week he bothers to see you?

It’s not difficult. You don’t live together you don’t share kids or finances and you only see him when he can be arsed. Please find your self respect. Being single is a million times better than this

What's there to love?

Don't sit at home waiting for a man to change, they never do. Get rid.

I don’t think he’s doing anything wrong having one night a week with his friends.
of you are spending Friday with him, it means you have Saturday for your family and friends.
I would expect him to miss it if there was an event you were planning or invited to.

Can’t you go with him? I’d be pissed off totally unacceptable to go out every Saturday without you especially when you have no kids to look after

we have talked he says I am a priority. Time will tell but it shouldn’t be this hard surely

I’ve been through this. Let’s just say it wasn’t just male friends that were… important.

The priority was that I wasn’t there. Do you have any female friends to invite to go to the same pub and see how he takes it?

Problem is if you ask to be made a priority - then you actually weren't. Even now if he starts being with you on Saturdays, you know he's doing it because he was asked to - not because it was intrinsic. That would matter to me.

Sorry probably not what you want to hear, but that is how I would feel.

You sound quite miserable about the situation. Some people are very set in their ways and routine is routine. He's one of them by the looks of it. However, the fact that he is not listening to you about the issue and carries on regardless shows that realistically it's his way or the highway. He doesn't care and he's the boss of the two of you.

I wouldn't beg, and that's what comes across. He will either want to be with you or not and you can't force it I'm afraid.

What was your routine on Saturdays/nights before you met him?

Sadly you’re not a priority. After two years if you’re only seeing him twice a week you’re more like a friends with benefits. Personally I couldn’t imagine putting up with that in my 50s.

You have different expectations and I get your decision that probably means the end of the relationship.

Don’t blame you.

I think seeing someone trice a week when you’re older and both have your own lives is absolutely fine as long as it’s what you both want. In this case it’s not what the OP wants and she’s expected to git into his schedule regardless of what she wants/needs

Its quite obvious from the OPs threads about this man that they’re on totally different pages and its going nowhere

You need to have a conversation about what you both want from a relationship.

He may be in his 50s, divorced, kids grown up, and now just thinks he would like to date someone he feels a connection with twice a week. Full stop.

You may be thinking that if people feel a connection, then over time the relationship should evolve.

So rather than "Can we go out on a Saturday sometimes?" the question to him should be "What sort of relationship do you want?"

Oh bin him. Find some other interests. He’s taking the piss and you’re letting him.

I agree, I want him to want to be with me and not because I asked

Came on to say pretty much this.
He “says” you’re a priority but actions speak louder than words …….

It's odd he doesn't ask you along sometimes, are his mates' partners also ok with never seeing their partners on a Saturday night? Or is he going alone to just prop up the bar and chat to regulars? If you're not happy, bin him. I'd be upset that a long term boyfriend never wanted me around on a Saturday night, that's the whole point of having a bf? Does he go out with you when you do see him, or is it just TV then a shag?

Out occasionally but stay in most of the time

Words are utterly meaningless. His actions contradict those words completely.

He may spend the next few Saturdays with you, since you have raised the issue, but he will revert to form. If you were actually a priority to him you would not have felt the need to post this thread.

Men like this can and do further harm already weakened boundaries. And he’s a cheap date who cannot even be bothered to take you out somewhere.

What are you getting out of this relationship now?. I would also think your adult dc would be advising you to end this so called relationship of two years. This is who he is and he’s not going to change.

Do you love him or are you into the idea of him?. He’s not being very loving towards you is he?.

I’m shattered but it’s not going to work is it

And I take it sex is always on the cards?

He sees you as a FWB to suit him not a partner.

Cut your losses, this doesn’t work

What a boring man. Is he the best you can find?