Sick to death of being alone every Saturday night

[Ghlp]

Long term boyfriend spends every Saturday night in the pub. I would like to see him the odd Saturday!

You aren’t his girlfriend, you’re his friend with benefits.

2 Nights a week, after 2 years???

Nah, he's got another girlfriend... That's where he is every weekend.

Oh come on it's been 2 years and he spends EVERY Saturday night with "the boys"... It's 2 YEARS, not 2 months.

I do not especially think he has another GF, he gets his jollies twice a week and that enough. It’s your life op, not one I would want so what are you going to do ?

Why do you only see each other twice a week, after 2 years?

Seeing each other 2 nights a week after 2 years together isn’t a relationship. You’re still just dating, he doesn’t prioritise you or your relationship and he sounds immature. I’m all for maintaining friendships but having to religiously meet at the pub every Saturday night just scream not being able to grow up or let go of his youth.

It sounds quite casual, only meeting up twice a week and him never deviating from his Saturday night routine.
You're not wrong to want more than that after two years. It sounds like he's perfectly happy with the current situation though.

Maybe it's time to move on and find someone you are more compatible with.

Two nights a week is dating not a relationship. Any chance he still has a wife? Or another girlfriend?

Yeah , that’s what I pretty much think too .

Also , 2 years together , have you guys not had any weekends away in that time OP ?

Be someone’s priority rather than an option like you are now.

“DaisyChain505 · Today 08:10
Seeing each other 2 nights a week after 2 years together isn’t a relationship. You’re still just dating, he doesn’t prioritise you or your relationship and he sounds immature. I’m all for maintaining friendships but having to religiously meet at the pub every Saturday night just scream not being able to grow up or let go of his youth.”

@DaisyChain505 has nailed it. This with bells on. This might suit some but it doesn’t suit you. The fact that your friends aren’t generally available for Saturday night socialising because they’re with their partners confirms your situation. In your shoes, i would be considering moving on.

Have you said anything to him? You mention having adult children and this being a fairly new-ish relationship, so could this be habbit for him more than anything?

I think one of the differences sometimes in relationships that are establishesd later in life, is the expectation that the relationship will revolve around the life you've already built. That's fine as long as you're both in agreement - clearly, you're not.

That would be too inflexible for me. It's obviously not working for you so - if he's not prepared to compromise - you have two choices: keep putting up with it or end it. That's pretty much it.

If you just want to go out on a Saturday try Meet Up. If you want to go out with your boyfriend on a Saturday you probably need to get a new boyfriend.

Why do you stay in a relationship that clearly isn’t working for you, for whatever reason?

Kindly I think you are on a different page to your partner.Older people with RL often seem to have a hands off approach.Maybe due to past hurts ,I dont know. Do you see him much during the week? Can you see id maybe EOW would suit.Otherwise take heed from your friends ,They are seeing their partners on Saturday night !

Seeing each other twice a week is fine and perfectly normal especially for mature people with established lives as long as it works for both of them.

In this case it’s the inflexibility of him that’s the issue and the fact he prioritises time in the pub over time with the OP every single Saturday.

This isn’t working for you OP so why are you staying b with a man who doesn’t give you what you need?

I had a boyfriend like this before I met DH and EVERY time his team played a match he would be in the pub all day and therefore all night.
We didn't have DC together but I did and so on weekend days when I didn't have DC and didn't want to spend in some shitty concrete pub with a load of dead heads watching the footy but wanted to see my boyfriend, I would be alone.
I used to drive past a sandwich board outside a local pub to me and that would have match listings on it for that week and that would be how I knew whether we would see each other that weekend.

It wasn't good enough for me so I dumped him.

What's the point of a partner in your life if you spend most of the time on your own?
Get rid and find someone who wants to spend time with you.

2 nights after 2 years no thanks

2 weekends away. I will talk to him and if nothing changes move on

You finished with him before over this, so what changed?

Just seen the OP has started numerous threads about this bloke. So he not only didn’t ever see you on a Saturday, he’s hidden you from his family and friends?

Looking at what you’ve said previously., you’ve been twisting yourself into a pretzel for months and nothing changed. You d said you’re in your 50’s - is this what you really want at this stage of life? You’re better off being singje and enjoying your own peace than living in this constant state of confusion just to have a man.

No mutual kids, just end it.

It’s difficult I do love him

He's not going to change so you need to decide if it's worth just seeing him twice a week or not