Would you be annoyed if your partner lied like this?

[luluxxx]

So my partner is lazy
I do everything in our house
Washing ,cooking etc
He doesn’t even so much make a cup of tea.
I tell him all of the time he needs to pull his weight but falls on deaf ears.
Last night I told him again ,hoping for a change.
He said he would and this morning as we are out to the races today …he would make me breakfast in bed.
Woke up this morning,asked him to make me a cuppa and he said he couldn’t be bothered to do breakfast but he knows he’s lazy and he said “I’m sorry for being so lazy,I will give you £50 to treat yourself to a new top or something instead of making breakfast and to say sorry for how I’ve been lately.
So I said that’s fair enough
Got up ,made breakfast and said “oooh il see if I can find a nice top online for my girls night soon”
He replied “you would really take £50 off me for making breakfast ..wow…I was joking obviously”
”il make breakfast next weekend”

Would this bother you?
I feel stupid and a bit silly now

Why are you putting up with this? He isn't doing the bare minimum. He was offering you crumbs as an apology and failed immediately. He offered you £50 for making breakfast AND an apology for his behaviour and THEN he reneged and tried to make you feel bad? Seriously, why are you putting up with this? His behaviour is appalling. He has shown you who he is, and continues to choose to be, despite you communicating clearly, and giving him chances... you need to decide if you are the type of person to keep putting up with this.

Are you this desperate for a man in your life?

No it wouldn't bother me ... he'd be gone!

Raise your standards.

Someone once told me that when people show you who they are, believe them.
I think that phrase really applies here. He’s shown you how he values you, what his says before/ during/ after is irrelevant.
your options are to either put up with it (in which case no point being annoyed about it) or cut and run. I’m absolutely sure you deserve better op but only you can decide if whatever else he brings to the table makes putting up with this worth while.

So do you just skivvy around after him? Don’t do anything for him. Make a cuppa, or breakfast for YOU. Only door washing, your dinner etc.

You genuinely believed him when he said he'd make breakfast? A man who does nothing at all? Are you genuinely that naive?

You do realise there are men out there that are NOT like this? Why put up with it when you deserve much more?

Does he have any redeeming qualities? Lazy and cruel. Raise you bar and end this. He won’t get better, he’ll get worse.

If you’re lying in the floor, expect people to walk over you.

No. Not this. Just leave now. He has shown you how he is. He is not going to change. He has no respect for you. You are worth much more. Find a better man. Please. Do not accept this treatment - if you do- your resentment will continue to grow and then many years down the line you will be so sad and wish you had just done the hard work earlier and left . Just do it. He is a cock.

Perfect 👌

Sadly, life isn’t always as black and white as ‘just leave them’. I know. From bitter experience.
It’s bandied about so liberally on here but sometimes people need to start detaching first before they feel able to make the leap to happier times.

He's a prick and you won't ever change him. Get rid.

Ew. This man child will never change. Get rid op.

He is not your husband and he is not performing well as a boyfriend so get rid snd have more self respect.

Stop doing anything for him. Washing cooling shopping anything. Stop it all. He doesnt like you. Dont bend over backwards for people who do not like you.

I think you have a right to be upset, if he is not pulling his weight around. I would not do any of his chores and tell him to do them himself.

Stop doing anything for him , he is taking you for a fool. Get rid of him and focus on yourself for a bit and put yourself first. Work on your self esteem and when you feel able to set boundaries you can start dating again and find someone who will respect you and not treat you like a maid. Be clear about what you will and will not accept in a relationship. It doesn’t get any better with selfish men like this. Definitely do not have children with him.

Yes I know. You are right it’s not easy to leave a relationship- I totally agree it’s not easy. Far from it. It’s way more complex than that I know. It’s so difficult in fact that women stay in relationships even when they are being out rightly abused. Too many reasons to go into here. However, there is an unhealthy behaviour going on here. There is no desire to work on that as a couple then it’s fair to point out to the op that a basic level of disrespect exists - he does not respect or value the relationship or her. He is a selfish person. If she continues to live with this then resentment will build and eventually there will be a much bigger problem down the road. So it’s logical to state that if that’s not likely to change through counselling and working on the relationship it needs to end. If that’s not possible eg financial reasons then op has to accept that is the man and behaviour she will need to live with. And the advice would be to set boundaries around what she will and won’t do. Eg not clear up his mess just leave it, get her own food and not his. Build a life for herself outside of the relationship. I do wonder how we as humans meet these selfish people in the first place and how people can be duped into falling in love and bonding with someone who is in fact a pretty awful person underneath. But that’s another topic!

A very wise way of looking at things. You get what you settle for.

He doesn't like you, let alone love you.

Lie after lie after lie @luluxxx

What would it take for you to say enough I’m done?

Only part being stupid and silly is for not treating him like the adult he is supposed to be and letting him treat you like this. My 17yr old son would not dare act like this round me. He will ring and ask if I want anything from the shop on the way home from college, make his siblings meals if I ask him to. Even my 5yr old autistic child will make me a slice of toast. He will only treat you they way you allow yourself to be treated. Buy the top and tell him its the least he can do. Personally I would have kicked him out, I have 3 children and need a husband/parrtner not another dependant child. I've been married 18yrs in may and together 24yrs in November. It takes allot of working together and compromises. However it is a partnership and it's give and taken from both sides. If it was the other way round and he was saying that I would have said the same thing to him. Know your worth. You are worth more.

I don't think I've ever said this but LTB. What a waste of space! Have some self respect woman! He will never ever ever change!

What happened to you that allowed you to accept such low standards from a romantic partner? This man does not respect you. I hope you don't have any children to watch this and think this is how men and women should be in a relationship.