Partner admits takes ecstasy on nights out

[SatelliteSpaceman]

Pretty much as the title says , newish partner admits to taking ecstasy on nights out with their friends, obviously an illegal class A drug and leaves them shattered and low the next day.

reason enough to leave them?

I would just say that getting lost into comparing drugs and other substances is a moot point in terms of the topic. Whether you believe in weed, alcohol, ecstasy or whatever, it's totally besides the point here. If a partner using drugs is out of his comfort zone, then OP should just exit the budding relationship, easy. I know I would.

of course! even in the ecstasy days late 90s grown adults in relationships didn’t take it, just teens at raves. and making himself shattered and low? financing illegal activities by buying them? not helpful. goodbye mate 👋🏽 🤷🏽‍♀️

OK what's your opinion on the vulnerable kids getting mixed up with county lines?
Do you care??

She’ll probably get bored of it at some point but are you prepared to take a back seat in meantime?

Anyone taking drugs regularly in their 50s is a bit of a saddo really. It’s cringy. They think they are cool but they really aren’t.

It’s a 20s thing. Then you move on. Leaving them lying around at home is a bit daft too but I don’t know how old her kids are.

Am now imagining Bernie in Coronation Street 😂

@SatelliteSpaceman Yes, depending how you feel about drugs. I find drug takers of any kind disgusting and would bin. Especially as his energy the next day will effect him in relationships. It could also not be the entirety of what he takes

Have you spoken to her about it? I would if I were you.

*she. And if there are kids involved - ugh.

what she takes, and her energy.. I did the same thing yesterday, I responded without reading posts that came after the original, and I hastily assumed that the person taking ecstasy is the man. Nope. OP is the man, the drug user is the woman.

No, would be a deal breaker for me now. Wouldn’t be if in early 20’s but in her 50’s I would walk away. Seen too many problems recently with drug use of people in their 50’s to think it’s a minor issue.

Yes of course I do.
I am clear I believe in decriminalisation of drugs. Ridiculous laws around low risk recreational drugs create drug dealers and criminal activity.

@AmandaBrotzman
Why are you encouraging the OP to take illegal drugs? Cannabis and MDMA are not harmless substances.

Would be reason enough for me.
Drugs to me are boring, immature and selfish and I have two children so it’s a no. I’d find it a turn off, especially the next day.

This would be a deal breaker for me.

I knew a woman who died after taking MDMA, leaving her very young children motherless. Anyone who claims it is harmless is just ignorant.

I would think she’s quite sad doing it personally. It would be a complete turn off.

Even cannabis fucks people up (first landed me in hospital with bipolar) and if nothing else worsens their ability to have a relationship, even if they don't notice it themselves. It makes people more self absorbed and depressive. I know from having been in relationships with some.

I like to think I wouldn't date a druggie of any kind nowadays.

But until then and it will never happen you're quite happy for that teenage kid and younger to take risks just so you can get your fix.
Cannabis causes huge MH problems and is one if the causes of SIDS amongst drug users who use cannabis as they zone out and lay over their baby resulting in death.
A cannabis induced psychosis is horrendous and can cause long term MH issues.
Your ignorance and entitlement are both frightening and disgusting.
Shame on you for supporting this horrendous industry.

Reason enough to leave. Aside from the health impacts which you have described, by condoning the illegal drugs trade you are saying that killings in Mexico and indeed of young men disproportionately of colour are OK in a way.

I'm curious about the many reactions like this. To me taking ecstasy or any other drug is either OK or it isn't, based on appraising the individual's overall life with the drug in it. If they manage whatever job, family and other responsibilities they have well enough (as plenty of shock horror DRUG USERS! do), and they are reasonably balanced, interesting people for whom the drug doesn't dominate their life or personality, I don't see the problem. If not, then yeah it's a problem and I'd probably avoid being around them. But what has age got to do with it?

In this case it sounds like the OP only has limited time to spend with his partner, and much of that time is wasted by her being knocked out from the previous night's bender. Regardless of the cause, I'd probably move on because it's just not a satisfying use of social time.

I liked an E as much as the next person years ago I may add.
Taking stimulants in your 50s is a dangerous game to play.Blood pressure/heart attack and it does happen.

I'm not going to deprive myself because a small number of other people get serious mental illness from smoking it.

But you can't tell in advance who will be affected, so anyone who smokes is gambling that they won't be one of the small number of people.

Who mentioned priorities- if she wants to go clubbing that’s not my business, but her being wrecked the following day does impact on me as plans get put aside - not to mention her having MDMA in the house with teens about sometimes shows a definite lack of judgment or basic care

Absolutely not for me and you’re obviously doubtful to have posted in the first place. It’s a bit scummy isn’t it, there are better hobbies out there.

I think the fact that's it's MDMA that's wiping her out for the next day is irrelevant. It could easily be alcohol. The fact that it's affecting you is what's relevant.

Ew. Instant ick and I wouldn't hesitate to dump them.

Doubly awful at her age tbph. Imagine being in your 40's or 50's and having learned and experienced so little in life that you think a pill or line is the epitome of a good time. Totally pathetic and not someone i'd waste time dating.