Less than 2% of people marry their childhood sweetheart

[LillyP88]

… according to Google! Do we think this is true? Has anyone come across the studies that these articles refer to? I suppose some couples choose not to marry so whilst they are in a long-term committed relationship, that wouldn’t count towards the data here.

Me and my DH are childhood sweethearts which was what sparked our conversation. We have a few friends who are still together too so I was a bit surprised the figures suggest it’s less than 2%!

We got together at 16 & 17, we'll have been married 60 years next year if we're both still here. DB & DSIL were 15, also still together.

There's a sweet spot for couples marrying around 28 - 32 where the divorce rate is lower. For marriages happening after 32 the chance of divorce increases year on year.

I married 26 - DH 28 - we met when I was 18 DH 20 always together if not always in the same place. That not unusal these days meet as couples spend time getting house deposit money for house then wedding costs or depending on area for career cycling though short term contracts and moves till permant job and your looking mid to late 20s anyway.

Theres a lot of pressure these days not to marry young - just live togther or get engaged.

DSis lived with her first boyfriend for years - bought a house together - got engaged - family like loads of time - she got pg - he was gone not long after but they still had to sell the hosue and still had the child. Break up was still very hard as house sale took forever and they both had to continue living in it till it sold. The order people do things is at times changed from the past.

51.3% in 2021 of births are now born to non married couples and couple with no civil partnership. There's suggestions that marriage in the UK is increasingly stratified by socio-economic status - research show it's very much a thing in US - but here higher education levels and wealth more likely a mother with young kids is to be married.

I know a handful of couples IRL - they met at 16/18 and 14/15, plus some who met in first uni and are still together (we're 39 now). My mum and dad were 14 and 15 but he turned out to be an abusive alcoholic as an adult and died when he was 41. I wish I'd married my childhood sweetheart - would marry him tomorrow if he wasn't already married to the girl he met after me (aged 21)

You really hate people who got together young don't you? I thought there were loads of rude posters but it's just repeatedly 😂

Genuinely why would people who got together at 16 suddenly grow apart at 40 any more than people who met at 25? And even if that does happen they've had 20 odd years of being in a very happy relationship, which is great. 20 + years is a long time and growing apart can ahppen to any couple. You wouldn't give up a happy relationship in your 20s because there's a risk you might grow apart in your 40s

Oh, I know two! Two couples, both from my year at school.

One couple together since 14 and the other late teens.

I am encouraged by all the 'we were childhood sweethearts and we've been together forty years' posts, as my eldest DD is getting set to marry someone she met at playgroup! Her Dsis got together with a lad at 16 and they split up after ten years, but I was on almost daily tenterhooks expecting them to split for years - it was quite a difficult relationship but neither of them had the experience to realise it.

I know someone who married someone he met at school... she was one of the sixth formers and he was head of year 🤢

I am not being rude in the slightest. The op posted to discuss the topic and I am. I am not hoping the op splits up or hating on people who got together young. I am simply saying, you can’t confidently state in your 30s that you’ve married someone for life and it’s worked out. It’s just fact!

I didn’t say I have married DH for life. That wasn’t what this thread was about. It was started to discuss marrying your childhood sweetheart.

Anybody who marries surely believes they’ve met someone they could happily spend the rest of their lives with. That seems a given in any marriage not a requirement for childhood sweethearts specifically. Even if we got divorced, I’d still have married my childhood sweetheart. Sadly, I don’t know many (I can’t think of any couple) who has been together as long as we have in our friendship/ family circles!

I’m not at all surprised by that figure and can only think of two couples in that position.

The first eloped soon after her 18th birthday (her parents had refused to give permission for her to marry before then, and were not at all keen on them marrying at 18 either). They are now in their 70s, have been married for over 50 years, and are one of the happiest, best-suited couples I know.

I also know a 24 year old woman who recently became engaged to her boyfriend from school. They had a long-distance relationship for 5 years when they were at university, including her year abroad, so they have spent quite a bit of time apart since school, but they now live together and plan to marry next year. Only time will tell whether it works out, but I have my fingers crossed for them.

I know lots of people who met their partner at university, but presumably that doesn’t count as “childhood sweetheart”!

I think it depends where you live.
We moved from a city to a small village a few years ago. None of our city friends are with childhood sweethearts. However, in the village we are now in (where there isn't much movement - most people are born and bred), I'd say about half of the couples I know got together in their teens.

Out of a group of 7 friends (all of whom grew up in the village except me), I am the only one who didn't get together with my partner as a teenager. I was 28, the others were 14, 14, 15, 17, 18 and 19.

Fascinating! I imagine most of the 2% live in your village 😂

It sounds like they must do!
It blows my mind.

Thank you! Married over 30 years, together over 40, in our case.

We did have a couple of years apart in uni though - does that mean we don’t count!!

I know one couple who got together at 15, same class at school. They're 52 now and still together. Couple of kids.

No idea how happy they are as I've never spoken to them since we left school. I just see them at parkrun. I hope they're happy. The odds are some people will have lucked out and found a life partner as a teen.

Only 1% of first relationships last.

2% get married, 50% of those end in divorce.

Nonsense.

Oh bloody hell. Zombie thread! 🙄

I most definitely did NOT marry my childhood sweetheart but you could equally say nothing worse than meeting somebody at 38 who is either on the shelf for a reason, or has baggage/issues.

Not sure it counts as childhood sweethearts but DH and I met when I was 18 and he 19 and have been together ever since (now early 30s). We are each other's first serious relationship.

I'm aware we are still young and anything could happen in the future, but we are very happy 😊

My childhood sweetheart turned out to be gay so I’m rather glad not to be married to him.

I certainly didn’t, not least because I didn’t have a childhood sweetheart.

I know one person who married her childhood sweetheart. Her parents didn’t approve and they eloped soon after she was 18 (by which I mean a proper running away together elopement not just a small wedding)! They are now in their late 70s and are one of the happiest couples I know.

I currently know two engaged couples in their mid-20s who first got together at 16. Both couples spent some time apart at university - for five years in once case, as the girl had a gap year and then did a four year course with a year abroad, but they obviously made the long distance relationship work.