Been told ALL men sleep with prostitutes!

[strawberriesandcream01]

Hi. I was talkin to a friend, her friends husband (they have 2 girls) goes to thailand for a boys holiday and sleeps with prostititues, the wife also knows this! He was talking and saying all men sleep with them. I certanely don't think my DP does and he works in germany all week. This man is a sleeze and goes out with a group of sleezy men who you can imagine do the same thing but surely he is wrong saying that?!

An older man once told me he could never go to a prostitute because if he was paying for sex he "couldn't perform".

He can't be the only man who feels like that.

I don't believe my dh has ever paid for sex even though he has never made a pronouncement on the matter.

I know my dh certainly hasn't. In fact i don't know anyone who has (or would admit to it).

I watched a programme once though about a prostitute. She was a more upmarket sort of prostitute and saw clients in her flat where she lived with her 8 yo daughter although she only saw clients while said child was at school. .

She was very open about it, said she did what she did out of choice, because she wanted to earn enough money for a decent life for her daughter. She even paid tax (although I can't remember what she classed her job as). She certainly didn't feel degraded, and had a lot of regular clients who seemed to almost see her as a counsellor rather than anything else - she said she knew a lot more about some of her clients than their friends or family.

At the end of the programme it showed her moving into a new house which she had bought with the proceeds of her profession, along with a baby grand piano. so she'd obviously earned a fair few quid.

Obviously in so many instances prostitutes are exploited, but some genuinely choose to do it for a living - I have no idea why.

Some undoubtly choose it because of the money they can earn but I would think the majority are feeding a drug habit or have a difficult background or have been coerced into it.
I think it is appalling for men to go from the west and exploit vulnerable women from developing countries.

No Dittany, not all men who pay for sex are scum. It isn't wrong to buy or sell sex. It's wrong to force people into prostitution, and it's unethical not to make as sure as possible that the sex worker you pay is doing the job of his/her own free will, but paying for sex and charging for sex are not bad things in themselves.

I agree madamez, if the worker is choosing that profession then it's just a business transaction based on natural human instinct.

Have to say that I have never paid for sex and never would. I agree with madamez and ambi that it's not wrong - it's just not for me. I was always one of those wierdo's who had to at least like someone and these days I guess I am a 'love fetishist' lol

Hmmmm.

No,I don't think that all men use prostitutes. Sounds like more of a self justification thing to me.

I had a boyfriend who used them. Not for long, he was not a nice person.

I'm not sure how I feel about it tbh.

My instinct revolts against the idea of poeple paying for their mate to visit a prostitute as a treat. There's something very sleazy and creepy about it - in my opinion. If my current boyfriend particpated in this type of behaviour I would be very angry and betrayed.

I think this says a lot about the company the friend's friend's husband keeps. Of course it's not true. And I don't think I'm being naive when I say I know none of our male friends and relatives would dream of going with prostitutes.

Yes of course all men sleep with prostitutes. This is obviously a true fact. It doesn't sound wrong at all. No question at all that your friend might be barking or anything. Oh no..

But are there enough actual prostitutes to go around every man alive today do you think...? That's the flaw to the theory imho.

Not all of them are wrong either!

I know a couple of perfectly respectable guys who have had sex with a prostitute. They were not in relationships at the time. One said it was a thrill, but probably wouldn't do it again and the other said it was horrible and degrading (he was young and on holiday with mates in Thailand)

A lot of them are correct. Any men who have to resort to prostitutes are very sad IMO.

He has a duty to be upfront about it!

Yes, but the OP says ALL men sleep with em. That is a laughable pile of shite.

Of course some husbands sleep with prostitutes or they wouldn't have any clients! However ALL men do not sleep with prostitutes. I think a lot of men would find it degrading and horrible.

I still want an explanation of a "love fetishist" - does this mean anyone who needs to have genuine feelings of love and affection with someone before indulging in a sexual relationship with them? Because that's not a fetish. A fetish is only being able to come off when you've got one size 10 stilleto on your right foot and there's an R in the month.

Needing to be committed, loving and loved in order to feel genuine desire and achieve gratification is, well, normal. Isn't it? Do explain.

Love is a fetish for some people: they can't have sex without it. That fits the definition of a fetish as far as I'm concerned.
I'm not saying it's wrong, I don't think fetishes are wrong (as long as you don't indulge them against a partner's wishes). But not everyone insists on love before having sex.

Well, they're not exactly sleeping with these pros, you know .

Sorry, that isn't a fetish. Its called having morals.

Someone got an OED handy?