Found my partner messaging other women on Facebook

[WallyHilloughby]

i suspect I know the answer but my partner left his phone on the side unlocked and a message came up. It was a woman responding to a message her sent her- just a flirty jokey message to her about something on a local spotted page for a certain place. She asked ‘sorry who are you?’ - I thought it was a bit weird but hey ho. Later on that night my curiosity got the better of me so I looked in his messenger inbox. There were many messages of a similar nature all to young attractive women. Some replied and chatted generally. Most ignored him but one in particular seems to have been chatting over a few weeks. Of course when I asked him about it he tried to sweep it under the carpet and said he was just contacting these women to talk as friends. When I asked why he didn’t contact any men to talk as friends he couldn’t reply.
could it all be innocent?

Oh come on hes not innocent.

He sounds like a bit of a predator.

He's looking to cheat, if he isn't already. What a sleaze ball.

You do know the answer. These are not his 'friends', it's clear that he doesn't even know them. The response saying "who are you?" suggests he is being creepy and even stalkerish.
Horrible.

It's not innocent. Ask me how I know 😉

No. He knows what he's doing. He's not looking for friends - he's targeting young, attractive women.

His intentions aren’t innocent, he’s targeted lots of young women, hoping that one start flirting with him, which would turn into exchanging numbers, he’s hoping for a sexual online banter with photos, look out for strange apps to hide messages, snapchat, telegram etc, if he finds someone local then he could actually cheat physically. Unless he’s very attractive himself, most women will ignore him but still, he sounds like a creep.

what PP’s said.

what a f**king prince…

Yep a sleazeball. Why not men or older women?
I knew a man like this. His ego needed the interactions. He got a buzz off every reply, infact even just him messaging them. They don’t change because nothing ever satisfies them

You don’t just message random people to be “friends”. Come on op, you know this.

There were many messages of a similar nature all to young attractive women

Oh no....he's one of them.

This man is clearly fishing.

Some men like him can never have enough. They absolutely love female attention and can't get enough of it. They go around social media private messaging women, or liking what they call 'thirst' accounts, even if is makes them look sleazy.

He thinks you're an absolute fool, btw. If he wanted friends, he can join a local sports club or talk to men. And what a coincidence eh, that they're not messages to 70 year old Ruth that manages the local allotments, or Barry needing to sell his bike.

I expect there to be accusations of you being controlling or jealous next, or preventing him from having 'friends'.

Take note - you don't have to have 'an affair' in order to be adulterous. It can be death by a thousand cuts, and what he's doing is adulterous behaviour. I'd end a relationship over that.

slap him around the face

You looked, therefore you didn’t trust. Move on,

Of course it’s not innocent. Your partner is a creepy pervy old sleaze bucket who thinks he’s a player but these young attractive women are probably laughing at the sad old chancer.

could it all be innocent?

No. He's looking for young women to hook up with. How old are the two of you?

Leave him as simple as that

It's not innocent. He's fishing. He's putting out lots of rods and hoping to get a bite. He will cheat on you, if he hadn't already, as soon as someone takes his bait and the opportunity arises.

It’s always “just as friends” but they never reach out to other men like that.. no innocence in it at all and given the chance he’d be taking it further than a few flirty messages.

He sounds like a predator! Leave him.

we are both 46

God what a loser.

it’s not innocent obviously. It’s worse, he trawls the internet for random women in hopes of cheating.

he’s trying desperately to cheat but no one wants him. How embarrassing

How old are the women he is messaging?

I don’t want to sound like a complete cow here but in terms of attractiveness he is not as conventionally attractive as I am. He’s always being told he’s punching. However I really fell for him as he was so sweet and so into me when we first met.
21 years on and two kids later he seems to resent me though. He’s always going out with his ‘lad mates’ and will frequently get drunk and post about it on social media. He really doesn’t act his age.

You're old enough to know your partner is a sleazy middle aged pest trying hard to hook up with women half his age.

You settled for an immature creep.

Get STI testing, he's possibly been cheating.

He’s a bloody nuisance. I get those messages all the time from sleazebags like him on Facebook. They start of giving loads of flattering comments and then progress to asking for photos .

I screenshot the messages and look at their friend list and send the screenshots to anyone who looks like a relative or who if they have a girlfriend or wife and I let them know what a scumbag their man is.