Sitting in the back with the children.

[LambethLil]

My mischevious side wants to post this in AIBU. I think it is really wet when the mother sits in the back with the DCs. Puts the DP in the position of chauffeur. Assuming that when the mother drives the children are unsupervised what can be the reasons and doesn't it undermine the partnership between parents.

i only ever sit in the back on long journeys if the dog is on the boot as he tends to want to sit on the back seat with the baby. so i just sit at the back to keep him in the boot otherwise i sit at the front. i know that does not help!

There are 5 of us in the family. The DCs fight to be in the front seat so we take it in turns. Not my fault if DH feels like a chauffeur - he doesn't always have to drive. He's a total arse about it - I think it's a sort of chest-beating man thing.

Would you find it wet to see a man in the back with the DCs?

I think that if something so trivial undermined the parents relationship, there must be problems with the foundations alreadu

I always sit up front. My Mum insists on sitting in the back with dd1 if her and Dad take her anywhere, it annoys me irrationally.

DH and I often comment on this - seems v wierd to us

Ok bethoo, you're not wet that's a good enough reason. I'm thinking of those mothers who sit in the back to do what ..supervise? maintain eye contact? avoid DH?

thanks, what pisses me off is when dp picks me up and he has a mate in the car and i end up sitting in the back with ds! i mean surely oi should be first priority?

cmot.. we comment too, I think its one of those nice unjudgey judgey things!

I always drive.
no room in the backseat between the carseats..

Ooooh, yes. Agree with you totally for all the same reasons.

In fact it's something I've always sworn we would never do, ever since some friends of ours arrived after a three hour journey - the mother had to be in the back to operate the dvd player for the two year old.

I suspect some of my feelings about this fall under the heading of, I had to spend my childhood in the back being bored so you can too, but even so. It's not so much about the parental relationship, but about the needs of over-indulged children being put first and last all the time.

ProfYaffle, it would annoy me too! My MIL makes a big point of not sitting up front if we two parents are both there- I offer to put her up front as she's older and I think its polite but then faffs about pretending to put on really not putting on her seat belt!

bethoo I think you may be needing a dog-guard there

I vomit if sit in the back of a car so never do and to be honest I wouldn't want to be hemmed in by DCs and stuck for the duration of a journey!

vsf- thats it! Boring as long journeys are its rather nice sitting side by side being a pair.

i tend to sit in back most of time, although recently i realised i felt a bit soft sat there..but me and dd read books etc so dont mind really..i MAKE dp drive unless its just me and dd/other friends going out as hes a shit abckseat(or seat next to me) driver!

oh definitely agree. I sit in the back we are taking a passenger who is less agile than me anywhere (eg PIL) - there's not much room between the car seats and also, tihnk the dds would not be chuffed ot have PIL in such close proximity (dd1 is ASD).

Otherwise, I am in the front wih dh. I have occasionally conceded recently that dss should goin the front (depends on car/journey length etc) but htis is again mostly due to comfort issues - dss is now 6ft, and if he cannot fit in the back, then I sit there (although we go by my definition of "fit" rather than his!)

i sat in the back with ds until he about 8 months old because he was a very sicky baby and sometimes choked. As soon as he grew out of that i started sitting in the front. He's three now and if we're travelling he's usually in the front of the campervan with us, but on a long journey in the car i will swap at services and get in the back with him so we can play/read books etc because he plays up too much otherwise.
I wouldn't sit in the back with him on normal day to day journeys though.

I used too on lonjg journeys when dd was tiny, that or listen to her screaming. Now she just sleeps so I sit up front. Bethoo my d does that with his mtes, pees me off too, aparentlynlong legs = front seat!!

I like my DH to sit in the back sometimes. Just so I can drive really fast round corners just like he does so that he can find out what it feels like

We rarely sit in the back with DD and then only if we need her to stay awake on the journey as it is easier to talk to her if you are in the back. She can entertain herself most of the time. In anycase it is always DH who sits int he back as I get travel sick inthe back.

ss- our bespoke PITA dog guard lets our skinny dog through. So there definitely isn't room for DCs with dog on lap and me! OI the only time DCs sit up front is if there is only one adult. They are children and smaller and the back seat is for them, not me!

LOL OI!

Glad it's not just me LL I always think it's a silent disapproval of me not sitting in the back. [paranoid]

OK so with some practical exceptions (dogs, sickly babies, leggy inlaws). I feel my judgey judgements validated. Thank you!

I have been sitting in the back of our car lately on family trips and I've been quite shocked at the strange looks people have given us when we've got into and out of the car.

In our case we've been doing it because the 'family car'(hate that phrase) has been out of action, so we've been having to use another car which is really a 2 seater for the 4 of us, and the baby seat won't fit in the back.

It has been a revelation. Can't wait to get back in the front though.

I sit in front but we're going to stay with friends in September and its a 5hr car drive, dd (7months) will be in her car seat on one side and dog will be in her doggy seat belt on the other side of the back seat. We've got a saloon so dog can't go in boot.

I'm thinking that I 'm going to have to spend the 5 hrs wedged in between dog and baby to supervise.

Wet it might be, but I don't thnik I've got a choice.