Sitting in the back with the children.

[LambethLil]

My mischevious side wants to post this in AIBU. I think it is really wet when the mother sits in the back with the DCs. Puts the DP in the position of chauffeur. Assuming that when the mother drives the children are unsupervised what can be the reasons and doesn't it undermine the partnership between parents.

I only sit in the back when the dog's coming with us otherwise DS would mither the arse off her

Rosa, do judge! As I explained in the post, I really thought it was legal- I'd reasoned that as you can't strap two one on top of the other, you could do side by side. When the police pulled me over, I had NO idea why- it was mortifying and I would never do it now I know its illegal.

My mum would never sit in the back with my brother and I. She was quite fanatical about it though - we used to go on long safaris, the whole point of which was spotting animals and birds from dawn till dusk, and my brother and I spent the whole time trying to peer out of these tiny little scratched landrover windows in the back.

• Did you see the rhino children?
• Where? Where? Is it even light out there?

We used to ask for a turn in the front but NO! Children don't sit in the front!

• But Muuuuum, that's not fair.
• Life isn't fair. Now look at the giraffe calving.
• Where? Where?

Sometimes she used to doze in the front while we continued to squint myopically through our cloudy portholes. I think she thought that if she gave us this small taste of autonomy we might rise up and smash the system, singing songs about our revolutionary brethren and lighting braziers.

• Darling, the children are revolting!

LOL Broccoli, that fits into my 'I am consistent, you are struct, she's a toxic parent- apologies to your Mum!!

What I cannot bear is a mum in the back and her child in the front.
Some one at school with just one 9 year old son does this every day and I think it makes him look spoilt and brattish and makes the mum look as if she can't say no to him.

lol lol lol

me and dp always swap about...sit in th e front or back or drive...

never ever ever have thought for a minute that status or united front or martyrdom cme into it!

I have my own car - I can sit in the front of it any time I like - it usually helps when I am driving it with screaming kids in the back.

why should it be a question of status where I might sit and when?

~I sit in the back with my dd3;. She is 3 yrs old and i have done this since she was born

I sat in the back with DS1 for a few weeks after he was born.
He did have a broken arm though and was tiny tiny and my PFB so I hope I am excused!

I got quite upset when he was about a week old and a friend took the piss out of me for getting in the back with him. I was just worried that he might knock his arm out of the correct position in his bandage and I wouldnt be able to see from the front.

Didnt even sit in the back with DS2 when we came home from hospital lol

My godmother always sits in the back on her own so the DOG can sit in the front seat!!!!

2.4 that's awful that a friend teased you. A tiny PFB with a broken arm would melt a heart of stone!

ah ha ha - my sister (the driver) puts her 1 year old next to her rear facing, and her pfb son in the middle of the back seats (cause they were told that is the safest position and her partner who is 6.4 ft has to squeeze in at the side. It's a tiny car too. Always makes me .

babblington does her partner not drive? i hate driving and although my DH and I share the driving if he couldn't I'd really resent it- is he in the back as a punishment?

Car seats can be taken out and put back in again in the same seat or another seat. It is not something that requires a degree to do .

Personally I think it is you people who are wet, you would rather sit in your little cars looking at what us fun people are up to and judge us on where we sit and who we sit next to than pay attention to what goes on in your own car .

Beautiful More puts back of her hand to her forehead, sighs and whispers "can't blame them for wanting to look at gorgegous me and my beautiful family though"

Perhaps you could all get stickers to go on your car seats. 'Mummy's seat' and 'Daddy's seat'. Just like the three bears

. All those long car journeys when dd was small, with her yelling in the back. It never occurred to me to sit in the back with her and entertain her... [thick emoticon]

I hate sitting in the back of cars - I like room.

I don't sit in back in ours - I can't reach the pedals if I do (dp never learned to drive).

I got in the car with friend and her pfb a few years ago and she asked me to sit in the back with baby in case his dummy fell out on the drive.

BB3 there was an article years back, can't remember where about spoilt children. The journalist had been asked to get out of the car and walk as the child was getting upset at someone sitting next to him- consider yourself lucky!

At the time I thought "Oh, okay then, if the baby will suffer horrendously and be in agony the whole journey without hsi dummy..." all the while doing this face

Now, having had 3 of my own and being made of sterner stuff my response would be "Bugger off! You're kidding, right?!"

Looking back, the pfb syndrome didn't just cover dummies, they stayed at ours overnight and every sigh, snore and snuffle from the baby monitor had them practically racing each other up the stairs to get to him first.

BB3 how's the then baby now? PFBness does seem to strike everyone and even when there isn't a sibling to knock their nose out of joint they seem to turn out normally. Interesting that the parents didn't put you in the passenger seat...(trouble making!)

He's a lovely little boy, but very very used to getting what he wants. They've had no reason to ever say no to him so I've never seen him not get his own way.

I'm sure we had precious moments with our first born but I'm sure we never reached that level. I hope!

I sat in the back whilst at least one, maybe two, of the boys were in the rear-facing seat because the seatbelt wouldn't fit around the childseat in the back.

It's not something I do these days, unless eg FIL is with us, or something.

Can't say I've particularly noticed or care what other folk do.

Moving along, it does seem to be a PFB issue. Which made me consider the issue of overprotectiveness and spoiling generally.. interesting that most PFBs eventually become elder siblings at some point, and that I guess, knocks some edges off. FWIW the two mega PFBs I ever knew stayed that way- no siblings came along- but have now turned into VERY agreeable teenagers.

STOP everyone ! How quickly MNers judge!

MY DH often sits wedged in the back between DS1 and DS2. He doesn´t drive, I do.

Both my DSs get car sick badly, and have problems at aiming their vomit, so DH is vomit catcher, with a bowl on his lap and baby wipes.

Otherwise our DSs and our car get all covered in vomit. I don´t think it is being over protective, just practical.

We have romantic times as a couple at other occasions