Younger (much younger) man

[Lily2505]

I’m 63. It’s not that I look “young for my age”; more that I am quite fit physically and am blessed with good skin from my dads side.

I’m three and a half years post a truly awful divorce and have had a number of dates but, they haven’t gone further than a coffee or two.

I’ve met an attractive man. Funny. Clever. Hot. But, where I was hoping for someone the same age or maybe slightly older, he’s ten years younger. I’m flattered but honestly, I’m incredibly nervous about sleeping with this guy. I’m SO aware of the age gap. I’m having a great time. We have fun and laugh together a lot. He too has gone through divorce after a long marriage.

Am I being ridiculous? I ought to be winding down and knitting for my grandkids now, not this!!?

10 years is nothing. My DSIL is 62 and my BIL is 53. Married for over 25 years.

My aunt was 17 years older than her partner who she met in her 50s.

I thought you were going to say 20-25 years younger.

so, have had a lovely time with my younger man. Amazingly patient and generous in the sack; kept asking me if this or that was OK/comfortable. I’m not saying he’s going to be the next “big thing” for me, or him, but right now? Just gorgeous. And a lot of energy 😉!!

@Bayroot1 Blussel. Is it only privately available? Without being too explicit (I hope 🤦‍♀️) it was all quite uncomfortable initially. I’d love me to really throw myself into this!

How is 10 years younger MUCH younger? I thought you were going to say that you were 52 and he was 19 or something! 😬

63 and 53 is not a big deal at all!

How long have you been seeing him @MyFairLady22 ?

.

Met him September so, early days. I was wondering if it was too soon to sleep with him but you know what? I’ve been on my own for years and just felt an attraction that frankly, I needed to act on!

it’s all relative isn’t it? To me, same age or thereabouts is 58-66. Give ire take. His mum is only 13yrs older than me 😐

Too soon? Almost too late!

I was prepared for reading he was early 20s. Jeez only a 10yr gap? No biggie for either of you. Enjoy yourself

And yes, get busy in the sack. Get shagging

And… I’d ideally like to meet a companion to go forward in life. I never expected to be divorced at 63 but my Ex behaved so appallingly that I had no choice. It nearly broke me.

So, in a sense, I KNOW I should be aiming higher in terms of age but I haven’t found anyone else that much fun or attractive.

I’m still kind of hoping that I’ll meet someone else who is more after what I’m after, in a relationship but that’s not always possible 🤷🏼‍♀️

I guess whether it was 'too soon' to have sex depends @MyFairLady22 Have you known him 2 months and seen him 20 times, or have you seen him just 3-4 times? It's all subjective.

Also, some (not all) women in their mid 60s couldn't think of anything worse than having sex at that age. (No matter what age the man is!)

Each to their own.

Oh God!! Y’think??? He’s done well to keep driving an hour each way to visit me then, without giving up!! 😂

If you were 26 and 16 it might be a problem. But you're not so get out there and enjoy yourself 🥰😆😁

I am 10 years older than DH. We've been together 26 years.

Clearly the OP has a more positive outlook on life than that. I have a friend in her 60s who sees 2 (slightly) younger lovers quite regularly; not both at the same time l hasten to add.

Sex can be good at 60!

Thing is, I’m looking for a partner. Sex is part of that. Unfortunately, it’s not possible to find out if any fledgling relationship is going to have legs, without getting physical. I have not been in any relationship since my divorce, just coffee dates and an occasional drink over the fantastic summer we’ve just had. Before that, I wasn’t in any state to even think of going out with anyone. My divorce was horrendous. All divorce is. But mine was utterly tortuous.

Truth is, I’m very nervous of liking this guy quite a bit and he turns around to say “Actually, you ARE a bit old for me”!

I'll check in with mother in the morning @MyFairLady22. She's 89, step's 81, they have been married for 44ish years. she still looks younger than him

Well if it isn't permanent, can't you just enjoy the sex? Loved the line from Pretty Woman, despote the film's unpalatable angles "I'm just using him for sex".

This!

I was waiting to read that you were in your 60s and he was 25!

Yip ...it's a non issue 🤣

You’re definitely not being ridiculous. I think loads of us second guess these things, but it sounds like you’ve got something genuinely lovely starting here. You’re clearly enjoying his company, there’s laughter, attraction, and you’re not being rushed or pressured – honestly, that’s more than half the battle.

The age gap stuff can feel strange when you think about the numbers. But it sounds like he’s not hung up on it, and if anything, he sounds emotionally intelligent and tuned in to you in a way that’s really refreshing. I’ve got a 14 year age gap with my partner too (I’m 51, he’s 37), and what I’ve found is that being on the same page emotionally and showing up for each other daily matters way more than who was doing what in which decade.

And you’re right – there’s no way to know if something’s got legs without seeing how you are together in all the ways. It’s early days and no need to pin everything on him being The One, but don’t talk yourself out of something good just because it doesn’t match the picture you expected.

Sounds like you’ve been through it, and you deserve joy, warmth and someone who makes you feel great in your skin again. Keep enjoying it – you deserve it.

His balls will be droopy as hell at 50. He may be equally worried about keeping it up.

Ummm, actually no. Not a bit of it. He’s very physically fit and very healthy in terms of lifestyle. No pot belly, gorgeous smile and silver Richard Gere hair. Totally worth the new underwear I’ve bought 🤣

And no issues in the eretile dysfunction department. The energy on this man. Ten minutes later, we’re off again!!

Oh, I ought to have updated. We have “done it” as they said in When Harry Met Sally!! 😉

Love it! 😜💪 sounds great lol . You also sound like you've got your head screwed on so enjoy , see what happens

What 50yr olds do you meet??

Given that women outlive men and in some ways age better, an older-woman-younger-man partnership makes a lot of sense.

Go for it ♥️