Passive aggressive Xmas presents for nightmare MIL

[Kathwithaknotc]

Please hit me up with THE best passive aggressive Xmas/birthday presents for nightmare MIL who is a right CF… must be able to pass off as thoughtful though. Age 70ish

Or to a ass donkey sanctuary

I posted this one last year but I got my sister (who is also deeply unpleasant) some bull semen from Good Gifts. Not literally, it’s a charity gift, you buy a certificate saying you’ve given such and such in the persons name.

https://www.goodgifts.org/prize-bull-semen-1

You could even gift package it in a cracker through the website!

i thought that was nicely passive aggressive, as well as useful and charitable! Go on, complain about giving to charity, I dare you sis 😂

I’d love this - hope my son/DIL sees the thread (or a link to the magnifying glass/tweezers or even magnifying tweezers would be great TIA

I’m with those advising be the better person. It really is more satisfying. Failing that charity gifts are also good suggestions and the bull semen is genius 😂

My gift giving is variable, not on purpose but sometimes I get it just right and other times clearly wrong. I gave Mil a nice brown leather bag with straps that can make it a backpack or over the shoulder and she was very pleased with it. Another year I gave her a Roka backpack that are so popular and useful (I love mine and lots of work colleagues use one). She goes to yoga and occasional travel so I thought it would be useful. Suffice to say it wasn’t well received. 🤷‍♀️

My own mother had no qualms about saying “Ugh I’d never wear that” to certain gifts from her daughters.

I think as one gets older one is able to see the funny side of these responses.

If the OPs MIL in 70, the OP is unlikely to be 14 - although with her attitude that’s how she’s behaving.

Maybe I'm not getting passive aggressive right but still

https://www.amazon.co.uk/Graphic-Shoulder-Casual-Aesthetic-Handbags/dp/B0B4HRMH15

It's a really stupid thing to do to anyone.

That would be ageist, but it isn’t ageist to recognise that we tend to get less robust emotionally as we age, and avoid making old people targets for nasty behaviour.

My MIL bought me this exact thing on my 40th. I put up with years of P/A gifts until she bought something so nasty that when opened on Christmas morning in front of everyone, she couldn't deny its cruel intent. Even her turning on the waterworks didn't help. I was so eager to please back then I never said a word. To add insult to injury it was an Aldi brand. It was also far from being the worst gift I received, including underwear in a size 18 (I was a size six at the time) because she said we were the same size and oven cleaner.
DH said to her he never wanted to see another gift unless it was cash or a voucher.

Bayliss and Harding hand wash and moisturise set. I think it’s pretty universally known as a shit, thoughtless present.

So cue lots of people predictably dissing older women and suggesting granny blankets and anti aging cream. Vile ageism. I hope you all reflect on that when you’re older and dickheads are mocking you for it.

And as for you op, you should buy her a lovely thoughtful present, because that speaks to your own integrity and taking the high road. Being pass agg just makes you as bad as her.

Have dh sort it, or make it clear you’ve spent very very little time on it, a supermarket candle with the a sale price on and a big standard box of chocolates.
alternatively regift or stage a regift, ‘forget’ to take the tag off the gift bag that addresses the gift to someone else. Or buy something that’s so clearly not for her that it seems like a regift. Or charity shop something clearly second hand that you wouldn’t normally gift someone. Like some very well worn and hideous shoes, but say you saw them and thought they were very her, because you are so thoughtful. Or you could get something hideous for her house, that you pretend you love and offer to put up for her once she opens it, and every time you see her ask how she likes it and where it is / if you can see it up on the shelf/wall.

Now that looks like a nice sturdy useful bag. 🙂

It says that it's ecologically friendly and made with water-based ink, so maybe it could be washed and the letters would come off.......

Cool book

I’ve remembered the best one my MIL once got me. She has a long history of pass agg present buying — eg. the year before the rubber car mats I got a nylon shopping bag that folded up into the shape of a whale; and a frequent birthday gift is one jar of a supermarket chutney that I don’t eat. (No prob, the food bank appreciates it, and I quite look forward to the appearance of my yearly jar of Branston!)

No, the absolute best one was the year she got a random snap of me with the rest of the family including her, DH and DD and some cousins, but I looked particularly bad, and was caught at a bad moment with my eyes half closed, my mouth half open and a massive double chin. She got it made into one of those big canvas photo wall pictures! It’s like the most horrible present ever, because I can’t put it up and neither can I regift it, and I can’t get rid of it either because it was “expensive”. It lives at the back of a cupboard and makes me feel like shit every time I go in there 😆 I highly recommend this as one of the worst presents I’ve ever received. 👍

Get her a jar of preserved lemons and tell her you saw them and immediately thought of her!

If you look in TK Max you can find some face wash that has SNAIL MUCUS in it. Just says it's a trend in France.

Get her a nice big canvas framed pic of you and the kids, without DH if you dare! She’ll have to hang it. How thoughtful!

Get dh to buy her gift.

Or a charity gift night be good - a goat from Oxfam?

Get her this teapot.

Eeee! I bet you're the mother in law she's talking about!

Thatt is appalling...whatever has happened.

Just tell the family you are buying for children only and they need todo the same for you

or leave it to your dh to sort

I agree. It's Xmas, season of good will and all that. These little revenges can backfire

It’s obvious: The first payment on some kind of funeral or cremation plan.