Boobs in your face!

[YehaaYessir]

So I've been to a couple of wedding receptions recently and a formal event for DH's work.
Is it just me getting older or does anyone else notice the amount of women/ girls at these kind of events whose boobs are almost out?

I'm no prude but really? When did this become so widely appropriate? I'm not talking a bit of cleavage here, I'm talking everything on show, the whole lot out to a millimetre or two from the nipples.

I just wonder why so many girls these days feel the need to do this? Are they insecure about the rest of themselves? Or is it an empowerment thing- that they will know what every male who sees them that night will be thinking?

I for one would prefer not to be confronted by pairs of bare boobs in my face on a night out?
Has anyone else noticed this?

Oh right, so the way you dress is "provocative" now is it ? I thought it wasn't meant to inspire any feelings in others.

Also quite telling that you only dress provocatively to female only events. Is there a reason why you don't dress like that when males are present?

Oh right, so the way you dress is "provocative" now is it ? I thought it wasn't meant to inspire any feelings in others.
I'm mirroring the language being used for ease. You would probably describe my dress sense as provocative at times.

Also quite telling that you only dress provocatively to female only events. Is there a reason why you don't dress like that when males are present?

It's not as deep an issue as you are making out to be. I tend to socialise at big 'dressy' events with women. I attend a lot of female only events at clubs and just don't do the equivalent with men. The only exception is when I occasionally attend a burlesque event with my husband. But the crowd tends to be more female there too.

I don't actively choose to dress in a particular way when men are around. I choose my outfit based on the occasion. My female only events are the type where outrageous, sexy outfits are actively encouraged.

I much prefer female company so seek that out.

Then why the repeated reference to a woman's sexuality?
I don't think I've done that, we're talking about what clothing is appropriate for which situations.

What other behaviour do you declare attention seeking and therefore inappropriate?
Screaming and shouting in public, and dominating conversations for ages and ages without allowing anyone else to get a word in edgeways.

Only if you see it as a competition. Such a bizarre way to see it!
Women who display a lot of boob ARE competing with other women for male attention. Even if they're clueless enough not to realise it.

Again, this is all your personal preference. A woman dressing differently to you does not deserve to be slut shamed for it.
Me, above: "...people who show lots of boob don't deserve disrespect for it."

Where do you find these burlesque events and mostly-female events where outrageous and sexy outfits are encouraged? I wouldn't mind getting mine out for a change, at an appropriate event, which it sounds like these are.

Where do you find these burlesque events and mostly-female events where outrageous and sexy outfits are encouraged? I wouldn't mind getting mine out for a change, at an appropriate event, which it sounds like these are.

Where are you based?

There is two issues which some posters are mixing up

whats appropriate for certain venues and events
a moral judgement on the persons values or desires based on their appearance

no one disagrees that some things are not appropriate in certain settings, cycling shorts in the office, low cut short dresses at funerals, as two examples.

this is very different to the moral judgements the op and the few who agree with her are making.

howver the bottom line is if you take your feelings further than it’s a bit inappropriate for the setting, but move to cheap grabs of male attention, promiscuous etc, then you’re in the wrong, you more than the person in the clothing. It’s you who is the issue.

what women on here are saying is yes it can be inappropriate but it doesn’t bother them and they place no moral judgement on the person. Not let’s all get our tits out at great uncle jimmys funeral.

people should just own it. Say you’re jealous, feel frumpy, insecure and seeing women who you think look sexual or provocative brings out those negative feelings about yourself.

tben deal with your issues, don’t try to abuse the woman, decide she’s the problem, she isn’t. There will always be a woman who looks better than you. There will always be something who you think is more attractive, who you think your husband may fancy, deal with your jealousy, insecurity, appearance issues. As that’s the root cause of the issue.

They can wear what they want but I fund the full pulling down the skirt and pulling up the top a bit uncomfortable just looking at them. I wouldn't imagine myself doing it, but I was a teen young woman time ago and the fashion was washed oversize denim and shoulder pads.

What a pitiful way to see the world and the women who live in it.

I said they DON'T deserve disrespect for dressing skimpily. Am wondering if you skimmed and thought I said they do deserve that?

Edited.

You said 'Women who display a lot of boob ARE competing with other women for male attention. Even if they're clueless enough not to realise it.'. It's this closed mindedness I pity you for.

Ah unfortunately I'm quite far away from you. Waaay up north.

Oh well, it was worth a try.

It's not Hebden's women's disco, is it? I've always thought that that sounds a like a complete laugh.

OK, well, many women do it for male attention, as some on here have admitted. Logically, if YOU want male attention, it means you want the attention, rather than another women having it. Right?

Nope, not heard of that. Sounds fun though.

I think I did own it when I said I wouldn't want my man socialising with a topless colleague etc and I don't care if that makes me uncool.

I thought about what you said above just now, and beautiful women don't irritate me the way a less attractive women flaunting her chest at my husband would. I'd feel much more comfortable with him sitting opposite a stunning young woman than a more average woman with her puppies out. With the former, I'd be totally fine and joke with him later that I hope he enjoyed the view! I think it must be the deliberateness of the latter, the fact that it's a cheap trick, and the fact that WE ALL KNOW what men think of breasts and she's putting it out there to get his attention. Whereas a woman with a beautiful face can't help that, and faces are not sexual like naked boobs are. Maybe the root of my irritation is that she knows exactly what she's doing, and I don't appreciate it.

I'll own it: a woman flaunting her bust at my man makes me feel like that well-known gif of the black cat filing its claws. And I bet it makes MANY women feel the same, except most won't admit it.

I would never say anything to her though, or give her the evils. Not gonna lie though, I'd insult her to my husband later. So shoot me.

If you don't want negative reactions, and to be thought badly of, think carefully about what kind of traffic's on the road before turning on your headlamps.

ETA: I would never, ever wear a breast-revealing dress to a group event, where I might be sitting opposite or next to someone's husband. I don't do that to other women.

The only place I'd wear a really skimpy outfit is on a date night. (I don't go to clubs.)

Try not judging other women by your standards. Some of us aren't so desperate for male approval. Some of us - and this will blow your mind - aren't even thinking about men when we chose an outfit. Neither are we thinking about how to fuck over another woman via the power of our fabulous boobs. It hadn't occurred to me there were people who would think like that until reading this thread.

Can you not see the misogyny in what you are posting. Some of the things you are saying are truly awful. I'm glad I've not been able to recommend any events to you as the women i know are women's women. We build each other up and you most certainly don't @CrystalShoe

I thought about what you said above just now, and beautiful women don't irritate me the way a less attractive women flaunting her chest at my husband would. I'd feel much more comfortable with him sitting opposite a stunning young woman than a more average woman with her puppies out. With the former, I'd be totally fine and joke with him later that I hope he enjoyed the view! I think it must be the deliberateness of the latter, the fact that it's a cheap trick, and the fact that WE ALL KNOW what men think of breasts and she's putting it out there to get his attention.

This is disgusting. So women you don't think are attractive should just hide their bodies otherwise it's just a cheap trick. Awful, Awful comment.

Whereas a woman with a beautiful face can't help that, and faces are not sexual like naked boobs are. Maybe the root of my irritation is that she knows exactly what she's doing, and I don't appreciate it.
So what if she knows what she's doing? Or maybe she just likes her outfit. Not everyone is after your man.

I'll own it: a woman flaunting her bust at my man makes me feel like that well-known gif of the black cat filing its claws. And I bet it makes MANY women feel the same, except most won't admit it.
That's a YOU issue.

I would never say anything to her though, or give her the evils. Not gonna lie though, I'd insult her to my husband later. So shoot me.
There's that misogyny again...not a great quality.

If you don't want negative reactions, and to be thought badly of, think carefully about what kind of traffic's on the road before turning on your headlamps.

Stop telling women what to do with their bodies!!!

But that's just ridiculous. Wear whatever the fuck you want.

I hate when other women serve their boobs up on a platter to be stared at by my man. I do, and so do many women. It's natural to feel that way.

Not sure where you got the idea that I think women who are not stunningly beautiful should hide their bodies. I don't want ANY woman flaunting her bust at my partner. I was responding to the poster that talked about insecurities and said that someone will always be better-looking than you, etc. and I said that I don't mind beautiful women around my partner, it's the bared breasts that I don't like.

I think you've got it all the wrong way round. Showing off a lot of boobage is the really unsisterly thing to do. Mine are pretty nice, and I would never do that to another woman. It's basic manners and respect.

@CrystalShoe You need to realise that women aren't dressing in a particular way to piss you off. Or steal your man.

And if they were then why does it even matter?

It is quite incredible that we expect women to change their behaviour because we don’t like the way a man responds. If your husband is tempted by another woman having some boob on show that is his issue, not hers. I despair and lose any hope of equality when women hold women responsible for men’s behaviour.

I hate when other women serve their boobs up on a platter to be stared at by my man. I do, and so do many women. It's natural to feel that way.

But that is a YOU issue. Doesn't mean you have the right to police what other women wear. Deal with you insecurities.

Not sure where you got the idea that I think women who are not stunningly beautiful should hide their bodies. I don't want ANY woman flaunting her bust at my partner. I was responding to the poster that talked about insecurities and said that someone will always be better-looking than you, etc. and I said that I don't mind beautiful women around my partner, it's the bared breasts that I don't like.

But you can't control other women's behaviour or their clothing choices.

I think you've got it all the wrong way round. Showing off a lot of boobage is the really unsisterly thing to do. Mine are pretty nice, and I would never do that to another woman. It's basic manners and respect.

That's because you dress for men and assume all women do. You also seem to think men are weak willed and all it takes is a nice pair of boobs to make them cheat.
I don't police women's clothes and assume they are all out to steal my husband.
Wear what you want, what you like and what makes you feel good.

I will build you up, tell you that you look amazing and not make you feel ashamed for wearing an outfit of your choice.

Well, I think they might be. But how can I tell?

It matters because for all they know, we might be going through a rough patch, and I don't need someone else's gorgeous breasts undulating at us across the reception table, reminding him what he's missing out there. Maybe I have breast cancer, or have had it. (I say this because I'm super-high risk and al the women in my family have died of it, including my mother, so this could well be my situation at any time.) Maybe my husband doesn't appreciate having to stay seated while his erection subsides - and don't come at me with the control thing, an involuntary erection at the sight of overt sexual signalling is nature, it doesn't mean he's going to actually lose control and fling himself at her.

For all these reasons, showing off nearly naked boobs at other people's men is rude, rude, rude, as most people know.

I don't think we're going to see eye to eye on this. I would never say anything to a woman who's got her bust out, or give her evils, or be disrespectful in any way, and that's the important thing. She is free to flaunt her wares, and I'm free not to like it.

I would never be so unsisterly as to flaunt myself at other people's men, and its a pity not all women give their fellow women the same consideration.