Hiya i need advice straight up honesty
Ive posted on here before about the same man that ended our relationship 8 days after I lost my father because it was too much for him
5 days later he came with apologies and sensitivity about how wrong he was and he just needed time.
Things continued but I'd found out he had been messaging other woman 5/6 month into our relationship, we have now been together 11 months and there has been nothing with other woman since. Although I did find out he had message a hooker on 2nd november and messaging numerous more woman than he had told me about but I chose to forgive him
We booked a holiday together with my children
While on holiday I'd found a message on his phone that he was with a woman on 9th March that he met on a night out, I waited for my children to go to sleep then asked him to come on balcony to talk this is where I brought it up. He denied it, I kept pushing for the truth and then my voice was raised he covered my mouth with his hand, I spat he then put his hand around my neck shouting in my face. I pulled his hand away he let go and went inside. I remained on balcony. He further came out apologising and asked me to come to bed. He seemed calmer so I did. I asked if he had ever done it before he said no.
I then told him I wanted to ask people and told him I has some of his numbers of friends and when I mentioned I had his ex wife number it was like he became possessed his hand once again around my neck pinned to the bed shouting in my face " what are you trying to do to me" "no wonder men have hit you in the past" he didnt grabbed me hard there was no bruise but enough to restrict me to pinning on bed.
I walked outside again onto balcony he followed a few minutes later I instinctively ran and hid under the table but he seemed calmer. I remained out there for even after he went back inside. He apologised profusely but then when I mentioned it he said hes never done it before and it was caused by me shouting. We flew back on Thursday evening and on the flight he had mentioned something personal that could have embarrassed me I said should we talk about something personal to embarras you he then said we had to finish because he didnt trust him self because of much I push his buttons and I replied so your blatantly telling me your going to put your hands on me again then I just ignored him the rest of the flight home.
He stayed at mine Thursday night then went to work Friday and went back to his. One minute he'll say its his fault the next he'll say its mine. Im so confused.
I haven't spoke to him for 24 hours he didnt message me last night asking if I was free to talk but I replied saying I wasnt frèe
Ive promised I wouldn't tell anybody because hes worried it could affect his business (self employed driving instructor) he has to do a yearly DBS.
Im posting here because I feel I need to speak to someone for clarity and if I go to my friends or family I know what they will say