Badoo

[Pregnanttoad]

Hi
I'm wondering if anyone can help me please.
Checked some online bank statements with my partner for something and I noticed repeated transactions showing £5.49 from [email protected]
He's saying they are transactions from online phone games however when I asked him to show me the games he wouldn't.
He was also very attentive last night in a way that suggested he was feeling guilty. I had a horrible feeling in my stomach when I saw the transactions and it hasn't gone away.
I'm not someone who has trust issues, I'm usually pretty chilled.
Is there anyone who can advise me please? Partner has denied any wrong doing etc and has said he won't buy online games anymore, I said I have absolutely no issue with him buying online games, but it doesn't make sense that transactions are saying Badoo on it?
Thanks

I'm struggling so much. I miss him so much. I'm not going back, it's just my life has completely changed in 10 days and it's bloody hard.

You miss what you thought you had - he’s a total git and he’s let you down so atrociously. You are worth a million of him. Be strong.

Yeah it's a horrible situation. I'm chatting with my sister and it's really helping. Helping me to stay strong.
I just never in a million years could have predicted becoming a single mum again and having to coparent with another man. Nightmare situation especially for my baby

I'm really struggling. How could he do this to me and my baby?

You can tie yourself in knots trying to understand him but ultimately, he's a selfish arsehole that wanted a cheap thrill.

You deserve 100 times better.

Yeah I know you are right, thank you this helps to hear this as it keeps me strong. All I want to do is be a good role model for my children and have a peaceful life. I know in time this will get easier

You are in the thick of it right now, and night times are always harder as there are less distractions. When I was in a similar situation, what worked for me was to spend this time on the things that made me happy. Focus on what I wanted to achieve and deciding what steps could get me there.

It's blinking hard work but you have so many people behind you and wishing you the best. For you and the children xx

Thank you. Trying so hard to stay strong. I've never been so heartbroken in all my life and I've been through some terrible shit.
Barely slept but at least my baby is sleeping happily

Well done. I so hoped that you would find the strength to leave this abhorrent excuse for a 'man'.
You are now in the scary, sad, traumatic phase and no one ever has felt this type of hurt or pain before. No one has been as much in love as you were. No one will ever mend your heart. No one understands.
We do. We really do.

I had moments of utter panic and such immense sadness when I had to call it a day with the love of my life. I really thought that what we had was special and unique and no one had ever felt that before us, so no one could understand what I was feeling. I kept thinking, what if it was my fault? What if I have made an awful mistake and he will change? What if I don't go back and this time he has realised what he has done and it wont happen again - and then I'm the loser because I didn't allow him that chance? So many thoughts and feelings.

Here I am. Six months in. No longer crying. No overwhelming sadness. Enjoying some parts of my life and even smiling now and then. Proud of the little things that I achieve without him. Amazed at how much energy I have and how much clearer my mind is. Amazed at how my health has improved. I also look ten years younger. I am able to see that it is possible to love someone with every cell of your body, but if they are incapable of the same, then you have to grieve that loss.
I am still grieving, but its more focused on why did I stay so long? Why did I allow that? The wasted years. I even feel a little sorry for him now and then as he is incapable of ever feeling such deep, emotional love and commitment to someone.

You will be fine one day, I promise you that. You are such a strong woman and you are doing what needs to be done. Never doubt that.