Went on a date today and found out he used 10yo pic

[PoliteEagle]

How common is that? Matched on an app, went for a coffee date. When I arrived I immediately noticed that a guy looks older and much less fit than his pics (fit in pics and overweight in real life) So annoyed. Before the meeting he also gave me a link to his linkedin and his pic there is also at least 10yo.
First time happened to me. People usually do upload flattering pics but this is outright lie.

I always get them to send at least a few selfies before meeting, and I send some to them. Ideally we video call but I know a lot of people don’t like video calling, including me!

There are so many fake profiles on these dating apps. I think apps should make everyone verify themselves before their profile can go live. If you’ve got nothing to hide then it shouldn’t be a problem.

I have heard many stories like that from men. One guy told me that when he told her that she didn’t look as her photos, she replied “That’s the age I feel I am”. Another one mentioned that the woman said “I was a bit cheeky” as if that would make it ok.

Agree about the height. I’m quite tall and I like men to be at least as tall as me. I can say that many men would happily add between 2 to 5 inches to their height. I have had people who said to be one inch shorter than me just to meet and find they are not higher than my nose!

Yes, very fit, always did manual work no beer belly.

They are such fucking creeps.

Doesn't everyone put their most flattering pic on there? It's human nature.

Most flattering RECENT pic yes, one a decade ago - absolutely not

I wonder why women aren't just blunt when they end up meeting liars like this, as in, "You would have been really ticked off and probably would have said something if I had used 10, 15 year old pictures that were very different to my current fitness and appearance, or if I had knocked 10 years off my real age 'because otherwise men wouldn't have been interested'. So why on earth do you think it was okay for you to do that? I'm out of here. I don't date liars."

Fear of male aggression maybe, we just never know how they will react.

I’ve not started it yet but I’ve been prewarned that many men and women lie on there.

Its very common to lie about height, age and weight and use old photos.

I’m like you, u don’t care about height or age, weight etc but I hate liars and no matter how nice they were, I couldn’t get over the lie.

women use filters
men very old photos

there's nothing really genuine there 😂

I've told this before.

I dated a man who said he was 5'8. Now I have no hang ups about height whatsoever and will gladly date someone shorter than me (I. 5'6) if he's a nice guy. I really don't care at all. After a few dates, Mr 5'8 told me I was really tall for a woman. I told him that I didn't think I was, maybe an inch above average height at 5'6. This guy (who was exactly the same height as me, so had lied about being 5'8) told me that I MUST be 5'8 and therefore tall, and was lying about MY height!

Sigh. I didn't mind his height, but I sure as hell wasn't being called a liar.

I had similar. He said he was 6ft but was about 5’9

My ExH and DS are both 6ft and I know exactly where I come up to on them so knew this man was several inches shorter but when I mentioned it he told me I must be talker than I think I am and it was me who got my height wrong - wtf??

There's a difference between lying about age, height and using an old photo whilst desperately hoping you haven't really changed all that much. Maybe he's just an optimist.

It comes a time in life (perimenopause/menopause)
when you age so quickly even a 6 month old photo looks older than it is…

With men… There is the element of how much they have let themselves go in terms of presentation in the time they have been on their own. Although that may happen to women too.

One thing that I have found is that people look at their best on the first date but it is not unusual for their presentation standards to go down massively by the second or third date. At that time I assume myself tricked as well 🤷🏼‍♀️

@GrandmasCat So if a woman wore make-up on the first date and then didn't, would that count as tricking someone too? Surely, everybody makes an extra effort for the first date but it's not realistic to expect that forever.

No, but if they put photos that show a certain standard, show at the first date perfectly presented and next time they are wearing some old trackies, yes, I feel misguided and I don’t apologise for it.

Now, if the second date is at a gym… trackies are ok.

If I go back on an app I will ask everyone for the most recent photo in their camera roll!

Mine is currently a medieval roof from the inside, a bombed out church and lilies in the garden...

so no difference between a woman wearing make-up and being all dressed up, then being all casual on the second date.

It's fine, but let's be fair, it's the same.

A lot of people turn to OLD because they don’t have those people. It isn’t a crime to be alone, or lonely.

Look, I don’t over dressed for dates, I just wear the same kind of clothes I would wear for a similar outing with my friends.

If we are having a nice dinner out I wear nice dinner out clothes, if we are going hiking, I wear hiking clothes.

If I go into meet-in-person stage with someone, it is because there are a good number of assumed similarities on both sides, if he looks appropriately dressed for the kind of life I lead, I assume we have some similar lives. I don’t want to get to the second date to find that all the “style” he portrayed on his profile and first date was a facade and in reality they look a mess in any average day. because if it that was the case it would be as misleading as saying they are 6ft tall or have old photos.

There is nothing wrong with that, I am only asking for what I offer and that is fair.

Every man on a dating app that I’ve ended up meeting that have claimed to be 5”10 all turn out to be 5”6 or shorter. It wouldn’t be an issue however they clearly just lied. I’m 5”7 so I can see if someone’s shorter when I meet them and it seems such a silly thing to fib about.

It’s such a disappointment when messages seem to have a spark and yet there’s none face to face.

I use current photos so they don’t get a shock.

I would have asked him why he’s using ancient photos. I don’t have time for bullshit.

I had something like that, he contacted me with the same photos of the profile that led us to meet 10 years before. He was a nice guy but we didn’t have enough in common, so I told him we had met already, he then invited me to meet to talk about the misery that online dating could be.

So I met him, he didn’t look as young as in his photos but he certainly looked way better, he had aged well and still had the very nice next-door-guy personality that I remembered. We were talking for three hours, had a good laugh, knew that we still didn’t have enough in common so stayed friends until we found our next partners. 😁

I matched with a man who claimed to be 5’11 but one of his photos was with a very well known retired footballer and he was barely reaching his shoulders
A quick Google showed the footballer is 6’2 so I’d say this guy was 5’7 or 5’8 max.

Such a silly thing to lie about when it took me 30 seconds to find out.