Oh Bananabeau you will be missed.

[Rainbows41]

I'm so sorry to see your post has been removed. You will be missed.
I refreshed my app daily in the hopes of seeing positive updates from you, and I'm sad you felt you needed to remove your post altogether.
I wish you well in your future and I sincerely hope you can fulfill your dreams.

You deserve to be happy.
💗

The recent posts from Banana 🍌 don't even read like her, as if she's firing them off quickly for fear of being caught. It's all so stressful.

This.

And I would consider confiding in your GP.

Yes, I noticed this too

@bananabeau when I was being mentally abused by my ExH I confided in my gp, it really helped.

Morning girls, I’m finally alone! Still a bit apprehensive about writing too much but I’m here. Sorry I’ve not sounded like myself, it’s been a really stressful time. But I have a few hours I can chat with you 🩷

lovely to hear from you @bananabeau . How are your partner and children being with you now? Have you spoken to your boss at all about what is going on?

No work aren’t fully aware but I’m sure they know something is going on. They are being the same, indifferent. But I’ve taken a major step back, they believe it’s due to illness!

In two years time, when this is a distant nightmare, where will you be going to for a well deserved holiday?x

only answer if you want to x

Somewhere quiet where I can just switch off and not think. Where would you recommend

Could you confide in your manager or HR? I really think you would benefit from telling someone what you are going through.

In my experience shingles can make you feel depressed and lethargic as well as all the pain. It might take a while for you to feel ok and get your energy back.
But I'm wondering if you've had some kind of breakdown if you're becoming overwhelmed with the stress?
For now you might just need to concentrate on getting better and put fixing the situation on hold.
I second Pp's idea for you to talk to someone, it will make everything seem more manageable.
Remember that there are lots of us here to support you

I appreciate everyone being here for me. I’m really sorry I worried u all so much!

I think I may make a follow up appointment with the GP. I’m honestly so so ill. Never felt anything like it. People in work have noticed my weight loss, I joke that’s at least I’m getting into my old jeans but I think they are worried. I was teary in work yesterday over the smallest thing. I just got totally overwhelmed. It’s so out of character for me. All I could muster was “I’m exhausted” they told me to go home and get a good nights rest.

im embarrassed at crying in work. The place I work is not one for showing weakness. It’s mainly a male based job and we are meant to be strong and reliable and I’m standing (not even sitting) in the middle of the office crying that I’m tired

Sounds like it would be a very good idea to go back to the GP. Hopefully you can get signed off for a bit and get some rest. The ideal would be if you could go somewhere for a while and do nothing. Do you have any relatives or friends you could stay with or enough money for an Airbnb?

I’m so sorry you’re going through this x

Go to Reykjavik, book onto the golden circle and waterfall tours, hire a car and drive up to the North, Lake Myvatn and Akureyri, the landscape is epic, and you can engage as much or as little with others as you please x

No he’s taken all my money. I don’t even have enough for lunch at work

That's financial abuse. Could you get to some local CAB or CAP centre? What a bastard.

This is definitely as last poster said financial abuse but actually this is also modern day slavery.
I would walk into a police station (or phone them) and tell them what is happening. This is truly awful.

Oh love this is severe financial abuse. Please please walk into a police station and get some
help. No wonder you’re ill. This man is a monster. What is going to happen when he finds out you’ve got a second account for your wages? Will he hurt you?

https://www.airbnb.com/l/4IdC9mPe

probably the cheapest place with a roof to stay in the Lake District

middle of nowhere very basic, compost toilet solar shower

What has he said to you about how he can possibly justify his horrible actions? How are you getting food? This is awful what he’s doing to you, so abusive

But if you're leaving the house @bananabeau to go to work can't you talk to someone, go to the police at lunchtime, call Womens Aid or something? What's going on at home with shopping cooking and mealtimes?

Can you ask your company to put your salary in a new account?

I believe that that has been organised, but she's waiting for the first payment.
I'm also wondering whether she should organise a standing order to a separate savings account.

I'm not sure whether the OP has seen this link yet: https://www.moneyhelper.org.uk/en/family-and-care/talk-money/financial-abuse-spotting-the-signs-and-leaving-safely