Thai massage stag do trip

[Seekingsue]

Hello all
so my OH just retuned from a Portuguese stag do weekend . I was worried in the usual sense - too much booze sun etc but he is a very trustworthy man ( I hope I think ) However 10 mins of his return back to uk he told me how after a 10 hour day drinking sesh he ended up having a Thai massage ( legs only in his boxer shorts ) I was abit taken aback really as think massage parlour happy ending etc . I didn’t really push anymore details but then spent ages with wild thoughts In my head - why was he so quick to say it ? Maybe scared I’d hear he went somewhere like that from someone else ? Why go drunk when I know he can’t remember what he does sometimes in that state ? Plus he looked a wee but sheepish .
i don’t want this to be a huge issue ( he goes away loads on lads trips and I’ve worked so hard on my anxiety / insecurity and trust issue from past ) but also don’t want this to eat away at me
any similar experiences or what I could do - I don’t want any details pics of the weekend as don’t want to feel like the noisy partner
x

They do if they offer more than massage… 👀

Bullsh*t OP…. I wouldn’t even be happy about a hand massage when drunk on a stag do…

Getting a massage isn’t necessarily bad. Even after a drinking session. But it’s weird to only get your legs massaged. I’ve never been offered just legs???

You know how your H is so if you feel there is something off you could be right. Sounds like you were nervous about the trip in general so could be reading into it too much.

Talk to him. Don’t make it a big deal. Just say it’s a bit strange you only had your legs massaged. Tell me more. Feign genuine interest. His reaction will let you know if he’s hiding something. If so try to dig deeper.

Me and my oh have had Thai massage and it was genuinely strictly professional. We were also stripped down to just our boxers/knickers but they covered with a sheet until massaging specific areas so I don’t think I’d strictly assume anything untoward unless I had reason to

I know, right? All this speculation on here - just ask the man! He is your husband!

Even if you were to give the benefit of the doubt that no Happy Ending was involved, it’s the fact that he told you within 10 minutes of getting home that makes me most suspicious. He is taking control of the narrative…before someone else has the opportunity to.

Why on earth haven’t you had it out with him? You sound scared of him a little bit.

Just asked my male friend what his Tai massages are like when he goes away with the lads.. he said they are usually massaged with the woman's boob's and lots of oil.🤷‍♀️

Sorry, but there likely was masturbation.

Well you’re not actually supposed to massage someone who’s had too much to drink - so not sure how professional this massage place was - massage and alcohol really don’t mix well.
Massage can increase the effects of alcohol so he probably felt way too drunk for any ‘ending’.
Hopefully just was a massage, joining in with stag do - but how you deal with that depends on so many things. Best of luck finding your way through it OP

Exactly!! He’s a liar. No one has ever, in the history of stag dos, decided, after a day drinking sesh, to go and get a fucking leg massage. Of course, many, many (many!!) men have decided, in the same circumstances, to go and see sex workers. What a prick, I am really sorry op.

He’s absolutely 100% talking utter shite.

Not many legit massage parlours are giving massages to very drunk men on stag dos late at night and after 10 hours of drinking, no man on a stag do decides that this is the ideal time to get a leg massage to sort out his aching calf muscles.

I get all the Thai massage can be legit posts but I have NEVER known anyone after a ten hour drinking session to suddenly decide they need an innocent relaxing massage. Absolutely bs!

Let’s hope it was just a hand job and nothing more grim!

id be getting an std test!

More likely to have needed his stomach pumped.

The Thai massage I had in Bangkok was the real deal. It involved staying fully clothed and bare feet, while this strong yet tiny lady bent me into various shapes as far as i could bend on a mat on the floor.

It would not be a pleasant experience at all with a pile of pints!!

Sorry, I think he's full of shit. Nobody goes for a legitimate massage when pissed drunk.

He will have told you so he could get his version in before you heard it from someone else.

Do you really want to marry a man who regularly goes off on holidays with his pals and visits massage parlours? This won't be the first time he has been to one.

He must really think you are naive. What do you think these stag dos and " lads" holidays abroad are for if not for drinking and sex?

I’ve had many massages including Thai massage, but I’ve never had a legs only massage nor a massage after a full day of drinking. That sounds very unusual to say the least.

Sorry OP - it’s not looking good. But I hope you’re able to get to the bottom of it and wishing you peace x

Massage therapist here.
I'm not going to speculate, just offer some information as someone who works in this sector.
Thai massage is a beautiful modality. It's my favourite massage to receive and I had one last week. It's a legitimate massage style, based on stretching and compressions mainly.
Having a leg massage only is a standard treatment. I offer this myself and is often requested by runners.
If a client is under the influence of alcohol / drugs it is a contraindication to massage and the massage will not proceed, (I am uk based and this is a standard rule here.) The concern is that the client may tolerate more pressure and there could be risk of injury. I personally would consider it a safeguarding issue with the client potentially being disinhibited, which could have implications for me. Other concerns are the client vomiting/ feeling unwell/ being too unwell to leave my treatment room on time.
I do not know what the standard practices are in other countries regarding their health safety checks. I do full consultations and get written consent from the client's before proceeding. I would not consider a very drunk person able to legally consent to the therapeutic massages in the style I'm trained in.

“( legs only in his boxer shorts )”

Of course it was legs only! 🤦🏻‍♀️

Jeez op. Wake up. And don’t be so quick to dismiss your instincts as ‘insecurity’ and ‘trust issues’. I’d bet my life savings he’s a cheat and a liar. So grim.

Don’t underthink it is better advice….

ive never been drunk and thought “I could really do with a massage!”

I have been drunk and thought, “I’d like to have a shag” though (many years ago before young children killed my sex drive I might add)

Can you imagine hitting a massage parlour after a day drinking OP?

it is possible his seedy mates got involved and he didn’t, to be fair, maybe that’s why he fessed up immediately. I’d talk to him about it again and see what he says.

op hasn’t been back..