Is this A Thing now?? (sex-related)

[Spf50AndAbove]

Split up with exH 5 years ago and in that time I have slept with 5 men since. Out of these, 4 of them have not reached climax most or all of the times we slept together. I found it really weird. They just 'kept going' for literally hours. We would have sex for a bit then have a break / rest then more sex. But they didn't cum. Or they only came once or twice out of many times.

Is it a porn thing? One of them was quite open about his porn usage 😒

I remember back in 90s / y2k there was lots of talk of premature ejaculation but this is like the opposite of that. They just didn't seem to be able to 'finish' at all.

The only other thing I can think of is secretly taking viagra? But sometimes they'd lose their erections so I am not sure it was this.

The 5th guy, the odd one out, was very apologetic as he only lasted for about 10 / 15 mins or so but honestly it was much nicer having "normal" sex for a normal amount of time rather than some weirdly long sex marathon.

When I was married we would have sex for a normal length of time. But we stopped having sex in about 2018. So I am just wondering whether this is now the done thing!

I think porn is a big issue, and maybe also anxiety about performance - thinking they need to last for hours? I think some men who don't need to medically also take Viagra, which can make them last an uncomfortably long time!

Viagra can make it slightly harder to climax.

There was a couple of occasions when I was just not into the person at all and it was not turning me on, although would go soft then.

It could also be nerves. When I was in that position I would have no problem with sex with someone that I didnt see a future with (ONS). But if it was someone I was keen on, the first few times would be nervy as hell. Dont mess this up, dont want to get dumped because I am crap in bed, dont cum too soon so what can happen is you dont cum at all.

But as others have said, could be the porn factor!

Apparently this is now sadly the norm. All a bit grim. If Dh dies, I won't be entertaining this shit, no thanks.

If this is the 5th one, then sadly isn't the only option is for op to upp her vetting processes and communicate a lot more, pre this, to gain info, to ensure that 6th doesn't fall into the same category?

What area are these men from that can go on for a few hours.
Asking for a friend😁.

😂

Hampshire...

Why have sex with someone you’re not attracted to or interested in?! Sounds like a bad idea all round!

Avoids Hampshire. I like a quick hard shag! 😉

Oh, we have those too!

Generally speaking viagra makes little to no difference in how long it takes to climax, I saw generally because of course it can affect men in different ways , but 90% of users will receive no delay in ejaculation. The ONLY reason they might experience a delay is a lack of anxiety, knowing they can stay hard, thus making the experience more enjoyable and prolonging it.

Porn could be an issue, but unless they watch the same type of porn every single time, and you are completly different it is unlikely. Most men watch a variety of porn and therefore a difficulty in ejaculation would be unlikely IMO.

the most likely reason is that men have been made to feel ( rightly or wrongly) that women want sex to last longer than they actually do. ‘Nobody wants a two minute wonder’ - therefore many might train to last longer by edging and or breathing exercises. I have trained myself over the years to orgasm nearly on demand, and whom with and what she likes depends on how long I last -

did you mention to any that you preferred a shorter session and wanted them to cum? If you didn’t then they probably think what they was doing was fine and dandy!

I dated one like this - just went on for ages - I’d get bored.

I've experienced this too. In one case it was put down to medication for an enlarged prostate which made it difficult to orgasm. The other time it was a different medication for anxiety. It seems lots of older men have issues.

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
After a while the mind does start to wander, somewhat!

OMG a 69 marathon would be my worst nightmare ☠️ can't see the point at all, always hated them.

Yes this is why I find it so weird! I've never known anything like it before and I'd slept with a good number of guys before these ones.
It's only men met I've met after 2020, and only men I've met through the apps whereas before I'd never met anyone before through Bumble/ Tinder / Hinge etc.

It's the death grip isn't it?

I’ve had sex with a circumcised man and he could go on and on. I think it’s quite well acknowledged that circumcised men can lose some sensitivity, probably more so if something has gone a bit wrong.

I love it and can do it for hours - it’s one of our favourite positions. I find it really easy and relaxing.

Do you not get jaw ache? Does your mouth go dry and you sip a nearby water? Your jawlines must be very toned.

After 2020 you say? Long Covid? 😂😂😂

It’s porn induced. Men these days can’t have partnered sex. They can only have sex with themselves, with or without porn as a tool.

Hours of penetration?! Are you not red raw?

My ex could rarely orgasm through sex. Even with oral it took ages and if I used my hand I'd have to go so hard and fast (sorry) that it was quite an ordeal. He openly admitted to using porn every single day. Our sex life was rubbish and made me feel like shit.

That link to the porn is really really grim 😩
I think that the 'death grip' is a thing; I hadn't thought of this but makes sense.