Are faithful men a myth?

[Blissfultiggy]

Do you think there’s any loyal and faithful men out there?

My dad is absolutely in love with Mum and has been since he was 19. We(my mum sister and I) have commented how he genuinely never looks at other women. He is 79 and still totally soppy about her.

I've been with DH 25 years and he once fancied a woman. Early on in our relationship and told me how heartbroken he was he did it but didn't want to do anything about it. He got over it and then found her really annoying (as often happens with crushes). I too have fancied a couple of people in our marriage but never acted upon it.

When DH fancied this woman I knew by the way he talked about her. I always pick up when people fancy people. Even when I was at school it's like a really shit super power 😂

So one bloke said something obviously dumb and you think that applies to every man? If he'd told you that the moon was made of cheese would you have believed that as well?

I have no need to, not interested at all.

Yes, there are faithful men and women out there, along with unfaithful men and women.

I had a bloke at work tell me about a conference he was at recently and the number of married/partnered men who went off with other women.

I know women who have been cheated on.

Also, a number of people on this thread have said the same thing.

Through the good and the tough, I honestly just fall more in love with my wife and kids. I do think morality plays a part too, and I don't live a life with any temptation in my path. I was a kid of divorce with pretty wild early teens and twenties. I think that helped me work out what was important in life.

To the best of my knowledge neither ydador any of my brothers have cheated.

Same with male friends.

I work a corporate environment with mainly man and it involves a lot of after work, some overnights etc. Ime, the majority, say 75% don't.

Of the 25% who do, about 20% are serial cheats. Every opportunity, not fussy with who etc. 5% I think are surprised theseves even, usually opportunism rather than going looking for it.

Contributing factors or the most common cases I see - married way too young, got married due to unplanned pregnancy, mismatched spouses - unbalanced relationship (doesn't matter if theyare carrying the bigger balance or spouse is), under pressure or failing at work- cheat to prove something to themselves - ie might not be able to get the promotion but they can still pull/massive but delicate ego type.

I've only know 2 cheats in my life where I was completely surprised. Rest were predictable. Not naive enough to think I know all the cheats - there must be some discrete ones who are good at it.

Like all 'equal and opposite' situations..

Is it that many many men are naturally unfaithful, or is it that many women are not worth being faithful for?

No, I'm not condoning cheating, but this question can be looked at from both sides (for both sexes). Is a man being pulled away easily, or is he being pushed? Another way of looking at this is, is the man always looking, or does he only start to look once his partner becomes 'unbearable'?

As I said, this works for both sexes.

I know men who have been cheated on. Hell, I've been cheated on by a woman. Study after study have shown that men and women cheat at roughly the same rate.

If I was a member of the toxic manosphere I'd take the fact that I've been cheated on plus the men I know who have been cheated on and conclude that all women are fundamentally untrustworthy and will cheat on you. But that's an appalling conclusion to reach, it reeks of misogyny and is also factually untrue. So I don't.

Yet there are multiple comments on this thread from people who could, to coin a phrase, be part of a toxic femosphere who have concluded that because they've known some men to cheat, and heard some tall tales from a few men, therefore all men are cheats. To me that's just as appalling and untrue a conclusion but here it's common currency.

I hope so but I’d never be so deluded as to think my partner would absolutely never cheat on me.

Completely agree.

My partner has never give me reason to doubt him and I trust him but there is absolutely a chance that everyone's partner can cheat no matter what.

80:20

I don't think it's particularly toxic. We know some women cheat, but if you're a heterosexual woman it doesn't really concern you unless they happen to be cheating with your man.

I don't have to think about the character of women I know because I'm not going to date them. Whereas I do think about men's cheating habits because I date men.

Yup they do exist, I know a few. I also know some - mainly in the very small minority - that openly flaunt OW and bring them along to client functions. Go figure….

But he's right if this was on a male dominated site saying all women are u trustworthy and cheet ot would absolutely be labelled male misogyny ( rightly so) but on a female dominated site the reverse is OK.

I'm also a heterosexual female but have an issue with this thread as it assumes all males are cheaters and all females are perfect which is absolutely not the case.

You miss my point. It's not toxic to say some men cheat. It's toxic to take that and conclude, say, that all men will cheat if they get the opportunity.

Not at all. I was in a relationship with a man who was totally faithful. We were together for 15 years, and married for almost 9 of those years (8 yrs, 9 months to be exact. ) We only separated when he sadly passed away in July 2023.
I've been in a relationship with my current partner for the past 19 months (we met at the end of September, 2023). We're both totally faithful to each other. We don't live together yet, but we're working on it! We also love each other very much. #
We live some distance from each other (different towns in the same county), and our jobs take us even further away from each other, which means that we can only spend time together at the weekend, or if we manage to take annual leave at the same time.
There are men out there who will be faithful to you. You just have to know where to look, and just be yourself. Try not to come across as desperate!

I'm.not aware of any man being unfaithful to me. Dick heads yes. I've been unfaithful so goes both ways.

I don't think anyone has said all women are perfect

As a woman I know of lots of other women who cheat, and know of men too. I think it’s dependent on the individual rather than male/female

I haven't missed it. It's human nature to.cheat so the majority of men will cheat if circumstances are right for it.

So will women ofc, but I don't care about women's behaviour, as it doesn't affect me.

I do think there are still good men out there. I have five sons and I often pray we have raised them to be good, faithful men.

There are ugly women out there too. Someone for everyone

Yes I’m sure they do.
Unfortunately I think they’re less common than in my parents’ generation.
Partly down to the good old internet, partly to the belief that they are entitled to take whatever they want, partly because the idea of marriage as disposable has developed over the last decades.
I may be a cynic, but I’m a sad cynic and I wish it was different.