‘Sexy bitch’ in bed. Acceptable?

[Fordscorpion]

Fourth date with new man last night. Had sex for the first time. He called me a ‘sexy bitch’ as we were doing it, and also a ‘dirty girl’ at one point.

Now, I know that literally I am neither a bitch nor dirty (‘sexy’ is highly debatable as well, to be fair. And I am a woman, not a girl, but that’s not the point), but I wonder whether I should take it as a compliment that he seemed to be enjoying the shag, or feel annoyed about it. Am I being over sensitive? He wasn’t saying it nastily - I think he was trying to be complimentary! Certainly no other red flags from last night. Thoughts?

And where has OP said anything about wanting to be wifed up? She may very well be just wanting some sexy fun too. It’s allowed you know, women liking sex for just sex and not as a bartering tool to get a ring on their finger, it’s not 1948 any more.

I personally like it. Quite a lot actually. But if it happened the first time I slept with someone, I'd be a bit put off still.

But hey, was it any good? Right now I might be more than a little insanely jealous of anyone who's getting it on.... 😂

Jesus H. Candlesticks @McReal. Madonna/whore complex much?

"Sexy lady" or "sexy woman" would sound a little Alan Partridge.

"Sexy thing"- cue complaints of feeling like an inanimate object 🙂

The trend towards total hair removal sounds great. I wish that had been a thing for men when I was a teenager. Even at 13/14, and without having seen a single porno, I always preferred my men to look like naked mole rats 😆

There is an episode of Frasier and he gets together with his new boss and they realise after aclling each other similar names that they are on air.

sorry that should be calling each other!

This.

Sounds like it was intended to be complementary. However, if you don’t like it say so early. It would be worse to not mention that it bothers you and then gets awkward bringing it up later.

Im really into it. I remember sleeping with someone who didnt say a word and I hated it. But if you dont like it OP thats fine - just tell him. Hes not to know.

Op your thread is reminding me of sex and the city when Charlotte was dating a guy who would say 'you slut, you fucking slut' or something along those lines.

I think it depends how he said it. If it was with a chuckle sort of thing then probably ok (not brillant but ok)

Said sort of aggressively I'd probably be uncomfortable especially this early on.
Sexy woman, fine, sexy bitch, not so fine.

It takes all sorts.

I had one ex who tried to talk dirty to me and scared the living daylights out of me. In fact he was so explicit I think he made me cry.

I've had one pin me to the bed using his police training on our first date when I was clear we weren't having sex. He frightened the life out of me. And yes he did more than pin me down and yes I had to have words with him.

I've had my hair pulled and had to tell him to stop (this was 15 years ago and yes he was addicted to porn)

I have men request that I say 'come inside me make me pregnant' as they liked feeling the power to impregnant a woman. I felt ridiculas as I did not want to be pregant.

Another wanted me to treat him like James Bond and say 'Good Evening Mr Surname we've been expecting you'

Another bought me a french maids outfit and I had to dust and bend over alot.

Jeez I sound like I've slept with loads of men. Nope still counting them on my fingers (one man was actually 3 of the points above)

I quite like filthy talk, but for some reason would draw the line at ‘bitch’. I just really don’t like the word at all- probably because it is most commonly used by misogynists. Only you know what you’re comfortable with OP.

See, I’m glad I’m not dating now. The sight of a waxed/shaved man would make my fanny seal up!

Agree
I personally wouldn’t like it though, it’s not very gentlemanly, I wouldn’t like to be referred to as a ‘bitch’ or ‘dirty’

M60 here

Lads - knock it off and put the porn stuff down! It's NOT real life

Have some respect and talk about it first with a partner.

Rant over

I'd love it. If you don't, tell him.

Me too haha

Like others have said, your bed your rules. I have no issues with a bit of name calling myself...but I am kinda 🤔 about how quickly he's done it. It seems sightly reckless given that plenty of women really don't like it.

What??
Is M60 you are a male of 60? I don't think your rant is going to reach many men on a mumsnet thread!

Good point, well made
I'll get my coat .....