How would you feel if a guy asked what size you are?

[forestflies]

So I'm talking to a guy, we both like each other, and are just in the early stages. No date/kiss/intimacy. But we text daily and see each other often. There's an age gap, for context.

Earlier this week when texting he made it clear he liked my "curvy figure" and said it's what he goes for. He said I was hot and he does look at my body.

When speaking with him today in person he said he did have a question but didn't know if it would be inappropriate. I prodded as he brought it up so he may as well say it. And he asked "what size" then looked me up and down. It threw me off, and I didn't really answer. He guessed a size (a size larger than I am), and said he almost guessed a size above that, so he was thinking two sizes larger than I am. I was a bit taken back, and didn't know what to make of it. I asked why he wanted to know and he said it was just curiosity. How would you react to this? Do I let it go?

"Never mind me . . . what size are you?" (eyes flicking to groin)

Seriously. that would be it for me. It immediately makes me feel objectified. Yuk!
And I have never, ever, had any man ask me what size I am.🚩

I'd be wondering if he was a feeder. I'd ask to see photos of his ex's. Since he can ask cheeky questions himself.

When I did online dating, I was asked this once. I didn't answer and blocked. He'd seen photos of me so it was obvious what I looked like so anything beyond that is unnecessary.

My partner recently guessed my dress size. I can't remember why now but there was a context. I think i was probably complaining about how wildly shops vary. He was right but we've been together nearly 4 years, and he didn't know and hadn't asked.

So yes, this has and would put me off.

Brilliant 🤣

“Buffalo Bill from Silence of the Lambs” 🤣

This thread has reminded me of when I was online dating I was chatting to a guy who seemed really nice and we arranged to meet up. The day before he said, ‘By the way, what size are you as I don’t do fatties?’

That would actually be a decent retort to the question I think.

'Woah, steady on thee buffalo bill'

Size clothes or size boobs?

Either way, throw him back.

That made me laugh - I hope you reported him
to the Bellend Police

Boak. Why are men so bloody tactless? I’d never say something like that “ I don’t do fatties” - even if I didn’t ’do fatties’ 🤣🙄
It would make me want to ask “what size are you, because I don’t do micro penises” but that would just lower me to their knuckle dragger level, so I wouldn’t.
And yes, I know it’s not all men, but I’ve also run the gauntlet of online dating so I’ve had more than enough interactions with socially inept men to feel that a lot of them have no idea how to talk to women 🤣

before I was married and was playing the field, every other man asked me if the carpet matched the curtains and it gave me the proper ick. Even the ones that were “normal” thati slept with were often taken back that my pubes are ginger…. Like what do you think they would be? Purple? And the amount of men that got my clothes off and commented repeatedly about my ultra pale milky white skin and super pale pink nipples and how they loved the contrast to their darker/ tanned skin. How small my waist was vs how big my boobs were in comparison. Just no! I already KNOW what my body looks like, I don’t need a bloody head to toe description. I’m not just a body, I’m a person with feelings .

@OnyourbarksGSG
Eew, as a natural redhead in my youth I experienced similar comments about carpets and curtains. One chap was absolutely fascinated with ginger pubic hair to the point of fetishising it. He wanted me to never shave it and spent an inordinate amount of time ‘admiring’ it, and touching it etc whenever we were intimate. Which wasn’t very often as it was a very short relationship, mostly because of this. I felt he only wanted me because of my colouring, not for the whole me.

Yes I would imagine he is planning to buy you something to wear !

Throw him back now or regret it later.

Honestly move on if that’s even a thought In his head run away fast, if you like someone you like them for them and questions like that just show how shallow he is. I do find it weird and a bit creepy but some men just have a number in their head and won’t go above it I had one guy online get furious when I wouldn’t tell him what size I was because according to him my photos looked old and therefore I could be bigger 🤣 blocked him straight away imagine going out with that

I would be off the guy instantly personally.

He has some kink/fetish, not some normal human preference of looks.

Maybe he wants to know your dress size to see if they fit him? 😬

It is not for some harmless purpose, as you don’t tend to buy clothing as presents in the getting to know someone’s stage.

Yeah, chuck this one back with a slingshot OP.

I don't know what "mathletes vibes" mean (curious, now), but other than that, I fully agree with this. The first thing that came to my mind was "he's got a fetish". I would run for the hills, as they say around here.

Yeah same here!

Mathletes vibes, it just made me think of that dude in Mean Girls from the Mathletes, I don’t know why 😂

As if he wants to buy some clothing as a gift ????? 🤣🤣🤣🤣

just your regular weirdo OP

I would reply 'perfect size' 🥰 .

Then put him in the 'not serious' category in my head.

I'd ask him what size HE is (iykwim)!

This! Really does sound like a kink which let’s face it anyone with those physical traits can fulfill - but if you want to feel loved for yourself then this is not the way. People who make a point of emphasising physical features early on and wanting greater detail like this are primarily led by their own desires and almost see you as a vehicle to satisfy them then as an active feeling partner 🤷🏻‍♀️

It would probably put me off ( but mostly because I’m fat and don’t want to discuss size )
but the almost guessing of larger sizes either means he hasn’t a clue or possibly been lied to previously so hasn’t a clue
might want to buy you something , but I would see that as inappropriate and too early
might want to brag to his friends
might want to wear your clothes
might be sinister or completely innocent
who knows either ask him why he wants to know , bin him or file the question for later reference

That’s brilliant…saved wasting your time on a date. It’s nice when they show you their red flags early

It's very odd and I'd drop him. Like another poster said I've never met a man who knows what the sizes even mean or the difference really.