How would you feel if a guy asked what size you are?

[forestflies]

So I'm talking to a guy, we both like each other, and are just in the early stages. No date/kiss/intimacy. But we text daily and see each other often. There's an age gap, for context.

Earlier this week when texting he made it clear he liked my "curvy figure" and said it's what he goes for. He said I was hot and he does look at my body.

When speaking with him today in person he said he did have a question but didn't know if it would be inappropriate. I prodded as he brought it up so he may as well say it. And he asked "what size" then looked me up and down. It threw me off, and I didn't really answer. He guessed a size (a size larger than I am), and said he almost guessed a size above that, so he was thinking two sizes larger than I am. I was a bit taken back, and didn't know what to make of it. I asked why he wanted to know and he said it was just curiosity. How would you react to this? Do I let it go?

Do the same to him and ask him what size whilst winking at looking at his crotch. Then guess 2 inches too small

I think it’s a bit odd, men don’t really talk about sizes do they? I’d assume most of them are clueless. It sounds to me like he might be trying to neg you. If he’s a lot older than you, and trying to neg you, I’d say red flags.

Is he that serial killer fella that wants to slim you down so he can wear your skin? 🚩

I'd give him a swerve, most normal men wouldn't be interested in what specific size you are, if they feel the need to comment , it would just be something like 'you have a lovely figure'

If he wasn't physically in my company, I'd assume he wanted 34D or 34-27-34 or something.

But to be...right there in front of you, and still be asking...no idea.

If he wants a dress size, you'll have to ask which shop!

Maybe he was thinking of buying you something? Or maybe he just said something really dumb.

It's definitely an odd thing to ask, but unless it's part of a pattern of creepy/weird behavior, I wouldn't necessarily jump to the worst case scenario.

I would have pulled him up on it though. Maybe asked for one of his measurements, and guessed a couple of inches shorter 😂

i would bin

Bin.

Definitely bin. He's a creep.

Strange and a bit creepy
i would wonder if he had a fantasy about women of a certain size

I bet he’s quite a bit younger and has a mummy fetish! He sounds like he’s more interested in your body than you. If you’re not serious about him then I’d stay just to have a bit of fun with a hot young bloke 😄

I would tell him it's not his concern, and make up an excuse to leave the date early. I can't stand men who are hyper focused on numbers (clothing size, bra size, shoe size, etc ), and ask inappropriate questions under the guise of "I don't know how I can ask this, you'll think it's a stange question". He very well knew you'd prod him after he'd mentioned that he has a burning question on his mind. I don't like this kind of sly, manipulative behaviour. If you have a question, ask it directly.

Do men even know about sizes - other than small, medium, large etc?

I've never met a man who would have any idea what a 10, 12 14 even meant!

I’m going to go against the flow here; l would be quite relaxed about it.

It seems he was with you at the time so he knows what you look like. His initial hesitation shows he was aware that with some people the question would not go down well. As mentioned up thread, most men don’t get women’s sizing anyway.

For context, l’ve been asked my bra size before, but l think that has been after someone has seen the contents. 😳

And he asked "what size" then looked me up and down

Nice big clear red flag.
You are a human not a slab of meat or an object.

Is he a fetishist? Is he a feeder?
Who cares....

Dump block delete is the only sensible thing to do.

My thoughts on this question would be “Red Flag-block”.

Weirdo.

I also don't understand the nature of this relationship. Why are you having these conversations if there hasn't even been a date (or did I read that wrongly?)? He's someone you know on real life? Totally inappropriate unless you're considering a purely sexual relationship/FWB.

Freak

He doesn't like you and is not interested in a romantic relationship. He wants to fuck you and is trying to push things in that direction as fast as possible. He has some kind of a fetish for larger women, probably a porn thing. In short, he is gross.

He apparently has no manners and no clue how behave respectfully. That's beyond inappropriate. And the fact that he feels emboldened to say this at the very early stages of a relationship doesn't exactly bode well for when he's got his feet under the table properly.

If you know any men who are really good, kind, emotionally intelligent, respectful people, can you imagine them saying this to a woman?

I’d think he was more interested in the fat than the person. Creepy fetish type.

He’s an idiot for guessing. Maybe he wants to buy you an outfit or gift? But guessing a woman’s size is stupid!

Sorry that would really put me off. It’s one thing saying he likes your curves and body - but asking what size and GUESSING? No.

Mathletes vibes?

This is one of those situations where he has given you a clear red flag that should mean 'nope', but you are trying to rationalise it because you like the rest of what you see.

He's either weird or negging you. Unless you want to have weirdness and/or negging in your life forever more, end this now, at an early stage.