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Original poster

Partner just confessed to seeing sex workers

93 replies

Issorryreallythehardestword · 02/03/2025 19:53

Just that, really. I went away for the weekend with friends and he just confessed he'd seen two sex workers while I was away. Plus one two years ago as well. I believe him that that's all. I have no idea what to think. He says he loves me and wants to spend the rest of his life together with me, and I believe that he he thinks that as well. He has a history of alcohol and drug abuse but is otherwise an excellent person. I don't know what to think and am in shock.

OP posts:
shieldmaiden7 · 02/03/2025 19:54

The relationship would be over for me. You can't even go awake for a weekend and trust him to be honest and faithful.

Gloriia · 02/03/2025 19:55

Run for the hills. Sorry.

MissScarletInTheBallroom · 02/03/2025 19:55

Throw him in the bin and never look back.

Original poster
Issorryreallythehardestword · 02/03/2025 19:55

Just to add, we've been together for four years, and own a house and dog together.

OP posts:
rubyslippers · 02/03/2025 19:55

He’s a drug addict
alcoholic
and uses prostitutes

he is not an excellent person - he’s a lying piece of shit
do you have kids / live together ?

either way you need to dump his arse, block his number and build yourself up

Gloriia · 02/03/2025 19:56

History of drug and alcohol abuse and uses sex workers yet he's an excellent peeson? He really isn't. Raise the bar!

madamweb · 02/03/2025 19:57

I'd be sawing his penis off with a rusty knife chucking him out without a backwards glance

He's not just cheated on you he's put you at risk of STDs too (as do all cheaters, prostitutes or otherwise)

Gloriia · 02/03/2025 19:57

Issorryreallythehardestword · 02/03/2025 19:55

Just to add, we've been together for four years, and own a house and dog together.

Sell the house and keep the dog. Definitely do not marry him or have kids with him.

IchiNiSanShiGo · 02/03/2025 19:57

He’s seen 2 different sex workers in ONE weekend? So a different one each night?

If he’s confessing to that, there’s a reason. Either, he wants you to end it because he’s too cowardly to end it himself, or that’s the least bad thing he’s done and he’s hoping you won’t find out about the rest.

I don’t know how you could even contemplate forgiving him. There’s no moving on from that. You’d never be able to trust him again.

Timeandemotion · 02/03/2025 19:57

Has this come totally out of the blue OP?
Why on earth has he told you this?
Surely your marriage must be over after this.
I would assume he has been using sex workers on a regular basis and not just on the occasions he has told you about.

northwestgirl · 02/03/2025 19:59

he's not an excellent person
he sees women as objects he can buy

madamweb · 02/03/2025 19:59

Timeandemotion · 02/03/2025 19:57

Has this come totally out of the blue OP?
Why on earth has he told you this?
Surely your marriage must be over after this.
I would assume he has been using sex workers on a regular basis and not just on the occasions he has told you about.

Agree with this too, I highly doubt these are the only two occasions. These are just the ones that (for whatever reason) he's realised he needs to confess to

Original poster
Issorryreallythehardestword · 02/03/2025 19:59

You're all right - i know. I feel disgusted, this is ask so far out of my frame of reference that I don't even know what to think. But yeah, I think I know it's over. Thank you.

OP posts:
ThisHazelDog · 02/03/2025 20:00

Does he think because he was unfaithful with a sex worker that he’s not cheating? I also wonder why he decided to tell you now and not two years ago. Is he trying to sabotage the relationship? I’m really sorry this is happening to you, no one should be treated like this.

namechangeGOT · 02/03/2025 20:00

2 prostitutes in the space of a weekend? Why has he told you (I mean it's good that he has) but why?

paradisecityx · 02/03/2025 20:00

Sorry OP, that's not ok. He isn't an excellent person. Excellent people don't do that to their partner the moment their backs turned.
He'd be a goner if it were me.

Original poster
Issorryreallythehardestword · 02/03/2025 20:01

ThisHazelDog · 02/03/2025 20:00

Does he think because he was unfaithful with a sex worker that he’s not cheating? I also wonder why he decided to tell you now and not two years ago. Is he trying to sabotage the relationship? I’m really sorry this is happening to you, no one should be treated like this.

Because this time he slept with her, the other times were 'just" hand jobs. Oh he knows he's cheating!! And he knows how i feel about that!!

OP posts:
paradisecityx · 02/03/2025 20:02

Also, very odd thing to confess to. I mean it's good he's been honest, but, I can't help but wonder why he's just come out with all of it?!

Original poster
Issorryreallythehardestword · 02/03/2025 20:02

namechangeGOT · 02/03/2025 20:00

2 prostitutes in the space of a weekend? Why has he told you (I mean it's good that he has) but why?

He was acting oddly and i called him out. I suspected he'd been on a bender but I had no idea it would be this had!

OP posts:
sprigatito · 02/03/2025 20:03

He isn't "seeing" sex workers, he is using them. He sees women's bodies as a consumable and he doesn't have much more respect for you - and your sexual health - than he does for the women he uses.

He is a disgusting, pathetic misogynist. I wouldn't be able to look at him, never mind stay married to him.🤢🤢🤢🤮

ThursdaysMonkey · 02/03/2025 20:03

Why has he told you now?

Mumlaplomb · 02/03/2025 20:04

Oh OP, he is not anywhere near an excellent person. I don’t think it sinks much lower does it? I’d be taking the dog, selling the house, getting my share and binning him off if there aren’t any kids here.

MissScarletInTheBallroom · 02/03/2025 20:04

Gloriia · 02/03/2025 19:57

Sell the house and keep the dog. Definitely do not marry him or have kids with him.

Show quote history

This.

Mumofteenandtween · 02/03/2025 20:05

sprigatito · 02/03/2025 20:03

He isn't "seeing" sex workers, he is using them. He sees women's bodies as a consumable and he doesn't have much more respect for you - and your sexual health - than he does for the women he uses.

He is a disgusting, pathetic misogynist. I wouldn't be able to look at him, never mind stay married to him.🤢🤢🤢🤮

This.

Chuchoter · 02/03/2025 20:05

You only went away for a weekend!

I get the feeling he's told you to make YOU feel guilty for his disgusting cheating and he wants to make sure you don't ho away again.

How great is his sexual urge that he can't last a weekend without that he has to pay a prostitute? A wank not good enough?

He's absolutely disgusting.

If you stay, you will be giving him the green light to carry on with his repulsive life style.