Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

What are my rights when husband keeps packing my stuff and taking keys off me?

135 replies

Gina8 · 25/02/2025 15:08

Married for 3 years. No kids.

The house we live in is bought by husband and he pays for the mortgage. The deeds are under his name only.

After arguments, sometimes he will pack my things and tell me to leave his house. Or demand I pack EVERYTHING and leave.

I’ll always agree to leaving straight away but I say it’s impossible for me to pack everything immediately but will remove everything within a week. He doesn’t accept it. He makes it difficult for me and then he will start packing my things for me. Basically throws all my stuff in bags. Sometimes he’ll throw my things out. He takes the house keys off me too.

I’ll usually go stay at my mums and then eventually (sometimes weeks after) he’ll beg and plead for me back. Even when I don’t agree, he’ll be persistent and overwhelms me that I cave in.

he usually kicks me out the house at midnight or later. He’s done this too many times now and I’m filing for divorce. I’ve gone NC.

I have no interest in claiming anything from him. And he can keep his house.

What I want to know does he have the right to expect to leave his house and take all of my belongings straight away whenever he demands. And does he have the right to take keys off me? Even though the house is his and he pays for the mortgage.

OP posts:
redphonecase · 25/02/2025 15:09

You need to see a solicitor.

theboffinsarecoming · 25/02/2025 15:11

The house might be in his name but you are married, so you are entitled to a proportion of it. If I were you I'd arrange to have somewhere to go to and the next time he packs your stuff, take him up on his offer and leave.

I wouldn't tolerate this behaviour - he is being abusive. Divorce the bastard and be happy.

TheGrimSmile · 25/02/2025 15:12

You are married so his house is part of the marital assets. It's not his house. You need a solicitor. I would see if you can pay for a one off initial consultation to set you on the right path. But as you are married, it is not just his house anymore - irrespective of whose name is on the deeds. Get legal advice and leave him.

Gina8 · 25/02/2025 15:12

theboffinsarecoming · 25/02/2025 15:11

The house might be in his name but you are married, so you are entitled to a proportion of it. If I were you I'd arrange to have somewhere to go to and the next time he packs your stuff, take him up on his offer and leave.

I wouldn't tolerate this behaviour - he is being abusive. Divorce the bastard and be happy.

I do leave each time he kicks me out. But then he does the begging and pleading and doesn’t stop until I cave in.

That’s why I’ve gone NC this time when I left.

OP posts:
Maitri108 · 25/02/2025 15:13

Why haven't you had legal advice? You should be entitled to a share of the assets but you need legal advice.

Girlmom35 · 25/02/2025 15:13

I think that depends on local laws, what kind of protection is in place, ...
Where I live he couldn't do that. If you legally live there, even when you're not the owner of the house, no one can expect you to move out at midnight and pack all your belongings at once.

Please stay strong this time and divorce this sad excuse of a man.

TheGrimSmile · 25/02/2025 15:14

He doesn't have the right to kick you out and take the keys, no. But if he's a nasty bastard and you can go to your mum's then I would get all your stuff and go. Leave the fucker and don't go back.

TheGrimSmile · 25/02/2025 15:14

...and you are entitled to some of the house, so take it.

Naunet · 25/02/2025 15:15

It's not remotely reasonable behaviour from him, and certainly not how you treat a woman you love, kicking her out on the street at midnight, what a scumbag. Well done for leaving him

Iamallowedtodisagreewithyou · 25/02/2025 15:15

No he doesn't have the right to do that. You can ring the police if he tries.

Or better yet, just cut to the chase and file for divorce including half the assets.

theboffinsarecoming · 25/02/2025 15:16

So you have left and aren't living there at the moment? Have you got all your possessions out of the house?

womanjustwanttohavefun · 25/02/2025 15:18

Uk law you are entitled to 1/2 the martial assets and that includes the house.

I'd make sure you get that given his shitty attitude!

TwistedWonder · 25/02/2025 15:19

Your DH sounds absolutely batshit OP so good on you going NC

You need to seek legal advice asap as you will be entitled to some form of settlement from him.

arethereanyleftatall · 25/02/2025 15:20

Well luckily it doesn't matter any more what he can and can't do as you're divorcing and have gone NC.

Which is absolutely the right thing to do and you should have done it years ago.

I read your other thread about the insults.

50/50 is starting point of all assets including the house

I absolutely would be going for your share if I were you as pay back for all the many many times he's treated you like shit.

Use it to pay for therapy and to start a new life.

MrsTerryPratchett · 25/02/2025 15:20

womanjustwanttohavefun · 25/02/2025 15:18

Uk law you are entitled to 1/2 the martial assets and that includes the house.

I'd make sure you get that given his shitty attitude!

Please don't give legal advice.

OP, see a lawyer. It depends on many many factors.

Gina8 · 25/02/2025 15:20

theboffinsarecoming · 25/02/2025 15:16

So you have left and aren't living there at the moment? Have you got all your possessions out of the house?

I took half what i possibly could fit and what he packed. he took keys off me.

other stuff is still there but tbh I couldn’t care about it anymore. I just want freedom

OP posts:
Donotgogentle · 25/02/2025 15:22

Don’t go back, no matter what. That’s a terrible way to live.

SparklyGlitterballs · 25/02/2025 15:25

So are you currently out of the house with no keys and your stuff is still in there? Hindsight is a wonderful thing but it's a shame you didn't think to get a spare key cut before it happened the most recent time.

Hire a van to get the rest of your belongings and inform the police you may be denied access and need assistance. Have something (recent bill etc) that proves you live there. It's the marital home so he can't just deny you access. It would be different if you weren't married.

FartSock5000 · 25/02/2025 15:26

@Gina8 you need to speak to a Solicitor. You're a wife not a girlfriend and you have rights.

Don't let him off the hook. Fight for what is rightfully yours.

RunVelma · 25/02/2025 15:27

TheGrimSmile · 25/02/2025 15:14

...and you are entitled to some of the house, so take it.

This with bells on!

Take what is rightfully yours and move on. He sounds like a controlling bully.

Naunet · 25/02/2025 15:29

Don't give up on what's yours OP, I know right now you may feel like just leaving it, but don't let yourself down like that, and don't let him get away with treating you so badly. Take some time to gather your strength, and then fight this fucker!

Donttellempike · 25/02/2025 15:29

womanjustwanttohavefun · 25/02/2025 15:18

Uk law you are entitled to 1/2 the martial assets and that includes the house.

I'd make sure you get that given his shitty attitude!

This is wrong. That is not the position in UK. And this is a 3 year marriage with no children. So the OP unlikely that get much

Ilovemyshed · 25/02/2025 15:29

Get your stuff, with help and support from others to protect you. Even if that means someone doing it by proxy and you on video.

See a solicitor, file for divorce and take a ring from the court on what is rightfully yours.

Donttellempike · 25/02/2025 15:30

arethereanyleftatall · 25/02/2025 15:20

Well luckily it doesn't matter any more what he can and can't do as you're divorcing and have gone NC.

Which is absolutely the right thing to do and you should have done it years ago.

I read your other thread about the insults.

50/50 is starting point of all assets including the house

I absolutely would be going for your share if I were you as pay back for all the many many times he's treated you like shit.

Use it to pay for therapy and to start a new life.

Not true.

TwistedWonder · 25/02/2025 15:30

womanjustwanttohavefun · 25/02/2025 15:18

Uk law you are entitled to 1/2 the martial assets and that includes the house.

I'd make sure you get that given his shitty attitude!

Not for a short marriage without children.

OP take proper legal advice asap not made up nonsense from randoms on the internet