What are my rights when husband keeps packing my stuff and taking keys off me?

[Gina8]

Married for 3 years. No kids.

The house we live in is bought by husband and he pays for the mortgage. The deeds are under his name only.

After arguments, sometimes he will pack my things and tell me to leave his house. Or demand I pack EVERYTHING and leave.

I’ll always agree to leaving straight away but I say it’s impossible for me to pack everything immediately but will remove everything within a week. He doesn’t accept it. He makes it difficult for me and then he will start packing my things for me. Basically throws all my stuff in bags. Sometimes he’ll throw my things out. He takes the house keys off me too.

I’ll usually go stay at my mums and then eventually (sometimes weeks after) he’ll beg and plead for me back. Even when I don’t agree, he’ll be persistent and overwhelms me that I cave in.

he usually kicks me out the house at midnight or later. He’s done this too many times now and I’m filing for divorce. I’ve gone NC.

I have no interest in claiming anything from him. And he can keep his house.

What I want to know does he have the right to expect to leave his house and take all of my belongings straight away whenever he demands. And does he have the right to take keys off me? Even though the house is his and he pays for the mortgage.

I am glad that you have left and are filing for divorce. If you are content to walk away with nothing - and in your shoes, I would be - that's what I would do. Let him keep what he has, and you start afresh with your peace of mind and dignity in tact.

Where is your compassion?

I'm just worried that you're deep down thinking of going back to him, otherwise why does it matter what your rights are regarding him kicking you out? I don't think he can legally kick you out of the marital home but I am not a lawyer so don't quote me on that. The important thing is that you're out and you're NOT going back.

Up to you whether you want to try and claim some of the house or if you want a completely clean break. But definitely break away from him, whatever you do. He's an abuser. Good luck.

I’m a family solicitor and there’s a lot of bad advice on this thread. I’m not going to give you any advice because there’s a lot of different situations and circumstances that change what advice I would give. However if you are on any benefits or low income please contact a local solicitors firm with a legal aid contract and ask them for an appointment regarding advice about obtaining an NMO and divorce and finances. The NMO would make you merits eligible for legal aid for the divorce and finances - depending on if you’re financially eligible. As you say he harasses you to come back you’d be within your rights to get an NMO if you feel unsafe. Good luck x

don't settle for less than you are entitled to, this is abuse both emotional and coercive control as well as potentially financial abuse, it is definitely unreasonable behaviour as sid aboe you are unlikely to get 50% of house pension etc but it depends how long you have been married
if there's a mortgage the equity might only be 50K but 10 % ie 5000 is a good start to a deposit and a bit of furniture for a flat
a solicitor can help negogiate maybe not claim any pension in return for more of equity as a cash settlement
also get a note put against house on land registry so it can't be sold without you being informed etc
you need a solicitor

Not sure why you keep going back?!

If you have all the material items from the home you want, including important documents, and do not want anything else even if entitled, go directly to a solicitor and file for divorce citing abuse.
I strongly suggest you contact link below immediately as well to talk thing through and get all of the help you will need.
Lots of love and support to you. Things will be much better for you. 🩷

www.womensaid.org.uk/information-support/

@Gina8 good practical advice here

Stay away from him, he is abusive. I know you think the house is his but it isn't, you are married therefore it belongs to both of you. You need your money to help you start a new life. Do not let him win by walking away with nothing. Even if you don't need the money take it and donate it to local charities. You cannot allow him to treat you like scum and get away with it.

Divorce him. He can't physically force you to pack everything all in one go and get out at midnight with all your stuff. If he tries to just call the police. But do leave, permanently. Go to your mum's for now. You're better off single. Nobody who loves someone treats them in that cruel manner. Do not listen to his pleas for your return. Block him and go through the lawyers only.

LTB

Why don’t you have a copy of the key?

Well done OP.

Get a solicitor and take him for whatever you can, even if it's just 10%. Consider it as recompense for the therapy you'll need to process and heal from his abuse, and for all the times he's kicked you out at midnight.

Clearly would take her copy of the key. Honestly, what is happening on here at the moment?!

Not, usually, after 3 years, and no kids. OP needs to see a solicitor.

What difference does this make now that you're out and not going back?

You need to start focusing on what's important - Getting legal advice at once about the divorce and getting your fair share of the marital assets. As PPs have said, you may not be entitled to a massive amount, but you will be entitled to something. Don't let this shit bag get off Scott free.

More fool you!!

Leave and don’t go back

When he’s harassing you to go back, call the police!!

Sorry OP but why are you asking this now ? It’s far too late . You have left and say you aren’t going back this time .
Why do you need to know ?

if you are going for divorce what has your solicitors advice been ?

Do you know how domestic abuse works? The abuser wears their partner down until they believe they don't deserve any better so keep going back.

That's the short answer. This may help explain it better...

https://www.womensaid.org.uk/information-support/what-is-domestic-abuse/

Agree.

Consider it compensation for having to deal with his abusive bullshit.

As pp have said, you need legal advice.
You can divorce him and walk away with nothing.
Or you can take him for 50% via the divorce. I bet if you walk away with nothing he’ll do this to another woman.
His behaviour imo is controlling, he has no right to take keys from you as you’re married and the house is a marital asset, no matter what he wants to claim.
I wouldn’t let the bastard get away with it.

The amount of people giving dodgy advice on this thread is shocking.

He is missing his free house keeper.
That is not love.
He is just a lazy selfish barstool.

Maybe educate yourself before kicking someone when they're down. Here's a link that might help:

https://www.womensaid.org.uk/information-support/what-is-domestic-abuse/

I think as you're married you have "home rights" so strictly speaking he didn't have the right to throw you out on a whim.

But in reality if he's prepared to throw you out physically, it's probably safest to go.