Converted to Islam for him, then we split. Feeling lost and alone.

[augustblooms]

No idea what I'm expecting here in terms of advice tbh.
I was involved with a man who I regarded as my soulmate, things were looking serious. We talked about marriage and the future.
He was from a Muslim background in the Middle East. I'd always been interested in his religion (Islam) and had been studying it. After a couple of years with him, I took the step of converting. Everyone in my family and friends were supportive as they knew it was my choice. There was never any pressure from him.
After converting, we scaled back on the physical side of things and both said it would be best to get married. I was all for this, loved him to bits and wanted my life with him and believed he felt the time.
Unfortunately, his parents back home in his native country had other ideas and wanted an arranged marriage to someone of their choice... After months of trying to make them see reason, he wasn't strong enough to stand by me. So I ended our relationship as I could see it was going to end in tears.
I feel so alone in Islam now. I live in a small semi rural area with no mosque, no community to speak of and I've been shying away from wanting to move on. I feel at a crossroads. There's no chance of meeting a Muslim man here. I feel so lost without him, although I feel ending it with him was the right thing to do as he'd never go against his parents' wishes. Even though he was almost 30 and well-educated.

@Rosieposiecosy
I'm afraid you have no idea of the depth of my understanding so please do not assume I am ignorant in comparison to you.

The point I am making is that not all Muslims should be tarred with the same brush. Islam, as with all other major religions, covers many areas and cultures. Some of these have traditon, values and practices that are not shared by many other communities under the same broad faith umbrella.

The main pressure on mixed faith/cultural relationships is from the community's perception of normal/preferred and is often attributed to their interpretations of religion. In many cases, familial pressure is portrayed as religious conformity. Financial pressure can also be a contributory factor.

I have seen this play out in many relationships involving different cultural combinations. Not just Islam: Hindus, Sikhs, Catholic, Protestant, Buddhist, Jews etc. These all have many similar stories.

I wouldn't say it is an exclusively male failing as I have also seen women succumbing to such pressures and relationships breaking up as a result.

It is, as always down to the strength of character of the people involved.
Some are able to withstand it, others attempt it for a while but eventually the differences & issues result in resentment/guilt and this contributes to the relationship failing.

Some people are able to overcome these pressures but there are not many. It is usually in those families where there is support for the relationship, that relationships survive the longest. But as with all relationships, there is no guaranteed happy ever after.

It is not an exclusively Islamic issue.

In my view, admittedly, religious observance & interpretation is down to the individual and should not be forced by anyone. I am responsible for my faith and conduct. I observe, respect others beliefs and observances but do not force my own understanding on them. And by the same token, refuse pressure to accept anyone else's.

However, I am fortunate in that I live somewhere where this is possible. Not everyone has the same freedom.