He struggles with the faster pace of London and finds that he doesn't like a lot of the people here and believes it will be different in a more rural spot. He's also keen to integrate more nature into his life
*our house budget is high enough to be able to get a really decent house in this area of London with a big garden and very close to some of the big SW London green spaces
No wonder you're not keen on moving.
I live and am from one of the most rural areas in Wales. I've also lived and worked in the centre of cities, and am in the centre of London a few times a year, so I hope to offer you some perspective,
I notice that a lot of people say the countryside is more 'slow paced' and the cities like London are 'fast paced' but that is mostly untrue.
Unless you work for yourself at variable hours, most people in the countryside have jobs. They usually start at 8am or 9am and timekeeping is as important here as it is in the cities. People don't just leisurely turn up 30mins late for things, and no one minds because it's the countryside. People who assume that live in la-la land.
I'm often slowed down by traffic....just not the type of traffic he might be familiar with. I'd say about 30 - 40% of my journeys involve me being stuck either behind a tractor at some point, who simply won't pull over to allow the queue of 10+ cars behind them to pass, or there's a lot of old people on the roads who don't seem to be able to drive faster than 40 - 45miles per hr, even if it's a road where someone could easily drive up to 60mph. The nearest dual carriageway is over 45mins drive away, so passing people like this is often difficult or risky.
This how 'fast paced' thing is often very much self-inflicted. It's people unable to say 'no' to events, feeling obligated to attend everything. Just because everyone else is rushing to get the tube, doesn't mean everyone has to. I'm naturally a fast walker so I blend in well with people's pace of walking in places like that, but no one HAS to be a fast walker either.
But now we that are looking to start a family, we are struggling a bit in where to live. I would like to stay in this area of London, as I have lived here 10 years and my family are close by, as are a decent local friend group I've worked hard to build up from scratch. My work is also very much specific to London as the bulk of the UK industry is based here
It's going to be so risky for you to move. Friend groups like that are not easy to make generally, and no easier in the countryside. In fact, despite the smaller, more intimate communities, it can be just as hard. Many people prefer to stick to the friends they made at high school, and don't really want to rock the boat or risk ruining group dynamics by inviting someone new along. Many women in the 30s generally just don't have the time in their life to devote to making new friends either, so you might find it really difficult to integrate. Even I find it difficult, and I'm someone who moved back to my area.
it will be different in a more rural spot. He's also keen to integrate more nature into his life
Lots of people like this move to Wales, so I think it's likely to be the same with Devon or Cornwall.
The thing is, a lot of them are in their mid 30s and upwards, so they might be a bit older than you. Although I think he probably would find people like him to make friends with, they won't all be sociable. It seems like there is a certain type of English person who moves here, and you'll probably find them there as well - middle class, eccentric or odd, nature loving but mostly unsociable, haughty or bad tempered. They've moved to the countryside for a reason - it's not to meet people like your partner - it's to get away from them. I'd recommend he keeps this mind so he's not disappointed.
he has no savings
No savings at all?? How come? Seems like a red flag.