Small things that have given you the ick when online dating

[idontknkowwhyibother]

Does anyone else fancy a laugh about the traumas of online dating (lighthearted) and that feeling of getting the ick mid-date?

I had a really silly one recently where I went on a third date with someone. I was already in the minds about him.

Anyway, we'd done an activity then went to get food afterwards and it was ordered on screens. The previous date I had paid and so it was already agreed that he was buying me lunch.

All good.

So, we got to the bit where the screens to order food were. I'm used to doing this in McDonald's for my kids 🤣 and always usher them to go ahead and put their food order in. So I suppose unconsciously I was expecting him to let me go first?

What he actually did was RUSH to the machine ahead, of me JAB in his order so hard he nearly broke the machine and just kind of....stood there. I sort of waited for him to offer me the screen and he didn't say anything. So I silently put my order in.

It seems such a small thing, and it is a small thing. But it took me back to being a child ans having a sibling who will rush to get on the swings before you 🤣

Thankfully I never slept with him but I can imagine how it would have gone.

Has anyone else got the ick from something as petty or is it just me?!

That’s fucking hilarious 🤣

Met a guy who'd said he was 5'8. He was exactly the same height as me (5'6). Now I don't care at all, in fact I like shorter men. But this guy asked me how tall I was, so I told him, AND THEN HE ACCUSED ME OF LYING ABOUT MY HEIGHT! Because we were the same height and he was (obviously) 5'8 (he wasn't) so I must be lying.

Quite why I would lie about being shorter than I really was I have no idea. But honestly...

So funny

Hilarious 😂

Omg

Last date I went on, he had a stain on his T-shirt on the shoulder and very long straight eyelashes that turned downwards, otherwise attractive but it gave me the ick.

On previous dates, lying about age, height, photos that don't reflect their current age are instant turn offs.

My brother said that men always add 2 inches to their height

Urgh, God, loads unfortunately....

The guy whose ambition was to be a self confidence coach and seemed to be practicing on me throughout the one and only day - I am very obviously confident and bubbly

The guy who had an upset stomach at my house in the first week of knowing him, absolutely stank out my house and I had to say he really ought to be in his own home if he was that poorly, and took him home. He then thought this was carte blanche to tell about all his bowel problems over the next week, including stool samples, he was gone the following week

The guy who was 5 years older than his profile, and his photos were about 10 years out of date

The guy who wore a nude colour short sleeved jumper that highlighted his moobs

The guy who was into old fashioned motor cycle rallies and talked of nothing else

The guy who texted me "how are you?" numerous times a day, um not much different to an hour ago?

So many immediate unmatches - thumbs up as an opener, your gorgeous, in fact any misspellings, shirtless selfies lying on their bed🤢

OLD is awful, I forget how bad it is, rejoin, then leave again, on repeat, for years!

Well yes, and I had no problem with him being 5'6 at all. It was him accusing ME of lying about my height that gave me the ick.

big shuffly maggot man this is so funny, even though you could get rid of a coat, unlike most of the defects on this thread...

Video won't load but I assume it's being a dickhead's cool? Definite classic!

This thread is hilarious - who tf over the age of 16 says 'finger blast' or 'flicking the bean' 🤢

Although I have to be honest and admit that DH turned up to our first date in matching superman trainers, socks and t-shirt... for some reason I found it charming 🤣

I once went on a date with a guy that only wanted to talk about his pet iguana, Eddy Izard .. the lizard. Literally every conversation moved back to the lizard. End of the night asked me home to see Eddie but I politely declined 🤣 🦎

I had that! A man who insisted he was 5’11 despite actually being no more than 5’8 and telling me I must be taller than I think because he’s definitely 5’11 - and even says ‘when was last time you got measured, you must have grown’

Yep growth spurts in your 50’s are a known phenomenon

@Andoutcomethewolves YES! 😁It gives me a little joy to know someone else on here knows about that song. I've laughed at it so many times.

Can I pinch this for my profiles? Because it’s spot on! 😂😂

Definitely agree all men add two inches to their height!

I'm 5'10 and like a man taller than me so I generally only match with men 6 foot and over.

I have learnt that every 6 foot man is actually 5'10.

My weird story to contribute:
First date with a guy went well, he lived a way away so for the second date he said he would travel to my home city and book a hotel. We had a fun day out and then went back to his room to get ready to go out in the evening.
He proceeded to go to the toilet, with the door open, and did a sitting down wee whilst having a conversation with me.... surely this is stuff reserved for married life, not second date?!???

A guy who constantly scratched himself, including his crotch area, and then seemed to smell his hand immediately after. I think it was a tick he didn’t even notice

A guy who when he ate it was like a starving wolf having its first meal of a week. I couldn’t even look at this when it happened. I tried to persevere with this guy as he was nice but it gave me so much ick, alongside other things

I can relate to the foul toilet stories! Seen a couple absolutely grim toilets that put me right off them and had one guy take a shit at my house first time he came over with extremely loud echo farts that absolutely stunk, I persevered dating him as he was lovely but he did it again the next time he visited and I never met up with him again 🤢

I recently had a couple of dates with a guy, we got on OK, stuff in common etc, we went back to mine after date, not with the intention of a shag (although wouldn't rule it out) but to have some drinks etc and continue the date. I have a downstairs loo that directly leads into my (large) conservatory, when we got to mine he went to the loo whilst I poured drinks. As I went through to the conservatory to sit down with the drinks I was met with the whole room stinking of shit. The smell was unbearable, he didn't even look embarrassed and suggested to sit down. I said let's sit in the lounge instead which we did, but I had such ick I got rid of him from the house asap. I know we all shit but it was seriously gross and his lack of embarrassment made it worse!

Used sayings such as "ace", "awesome" and "wicked". Like he was desperately trying to stay up to date and relevant.

@ShouldIEvenBother I'm traumatised on your behalf, omg.

The fastest ick for a small thing I had in OLD was chatting with a guy who used the 😋instead of 😃-type emoji, it didn't make things sexual it just didn't make sense.

Oh I’ve remembered some more

showed me a video of his sister’s ‘dancing’ which seemed to be some kind of steam punk stripper club.

told me he wasn’t gay but he had blown his friend a few times.

told me the same story about a 16 foot manta ray he’d seen in Bali 3 times.

told me he ignored the birth of his son for 7 years.

All the same man, professional naice family etc 🙈🙈🙈

You've reminded me of one who used to insist on nipping to the toilet to totally empty his (already pretty empty) bladder as I served up dinner or before it was served in a restaurant. Like a newly potty trained toddler.

He also referred to his semen as his 'product'. 😩 vagina still clamping shut all these years later

Oh God, I struck gold when I met my lovely husband and no longer had to date weirdos.

Appreciate mine are not silly reasons to get the ick though.

Not online dating but I dumped a guy once because everytime I took a drink he would say 'were you thirsty?' and heaven forbid I finished a meal infront of him... 'were you hungry then?'