My therapist googled my daughter

[VaseHalfFull]

Just started some psychotherapy as trying to process why my adult daughter who is struggling has again stopped speaking to me. In session 2 the therapist revealed that she had googled my daughter. I think this is not Ok. But not sure if this is now normal practice. Just asking for reality check in a wobbly time.

I’m a therapist.

it’s fine for anyone to google us.

but we are not supposed to google our clients or anyone they mention. I don’t even look at clients websites if they are in their email bio.

it’s not breaking confidentiality- that’s connected to us telling someone else that you are in therapy with us.

the reason we don’t google them is because we want to get to know the person in front of us! And we don’t want to be influenced by anything we might see online. Like maybe you are really successful but you don’t feel successful. I am interested in how you feel.

so no OP it is not ok that she googled your daughter. I would find someone else. I’m sorry you had this experience.

The therapist should not be doing ANYTHING that is not in OPs interest. It is for OP to determine what information she reveals at her own pace. This is a breach of trust.

As others have said, find a psychotherapist registered with BACP or HCPC.

Think very carefully about a switch to clinical psychology if you actually want psychotherapy

I am assuming you are not a therapist.

This is absolutely at odds to what I have been taught or would do.

I'm not even on social media, so actually have no way of looking at my clients social media anyway.

Ugh this is so inappropriate! I’m glad you terminated the call!

Is this from ChatGPT!?

God yes!! Really sounds like it.

It's for safeguarding reasons.

If the client discloses abuse then we need to know about the children.

That’s not how I work but I guess different places have different policies!

Last year I did CBT for anxiety and the first person I spoke to insisted I start talking about my kids, they wanted to know more about my kids than about my anxiety and they would not move on until I had answered their questions such as their full names and ages in the end I terminated the call and asked for someone else.

I would not trust a therapist who did this. Good you cancelled the call, it sounds very intrusive and pushy and certainly no way to build rapport.

I work for an organisation atm who ask for this info.

I doubt I'd do it if private

ran it thoguth grammerley due to my learning difficulties and grammer and spelling etc, apologies if this is not aloud

There are no regulatory bodies for therapists or counsellors as it isn't a protected title. There are only membership organisations, and even these aren't mandatory

You do realise most therapists don't actually attend university...

There's no minimum legal requirement of education level to call oneself a therapist in the UK

This is true, however BACP requires registered members to have done rigorous training, so worth checking with them if looking for a therapist (although I know excellent therapists who are not members of the BACP)

Is she a woman in her 40's who has had to rethink her earning potential after a relationship breakdown and whose friends have told her she's a really good listener so did an online therapy course

That's really patronising (and I say that as a woman in her 50s who has retrained- took 3 years and lots of driving and missing things that my kids were doing etc and a shed load of money!!)

They require a level four diploma in counselling. I wouldn’t say BACP are any more rigorous than anyone else personally. There are many many sub standard courses out there. And people often confuse BACP registered with accredited, which is an entirely different process (and again no indication of suitability or credentials)

This is not what psychotherapy is at all.

The client is exploring their situation and the therapist is supporting them in doing this, using information provided by the client.

Don't think the casual ageism or sexism is very helpful .

And faced with the choice between a 25 year therapist and a 50 year old, with the same qualifications and years in practice, I know who I would choose, based on wider life experience.

Also a therapist. This is absolutely a breach of ethics. It would like be grounds for complaint at BACP, UKCP or NCPS. If they aren’t listed with any of the major ethical bodies, run a mile!

To fellow therapists on here, please consider pushing for regulation via your ethical body

Your therapist sounds like a quack.

They require a level 4 which is accredited by the BACP, or you have to pass their certificate of proficiency.

@BodyKeepingScore to accredit as a CBT therapist with the BABCP you have to have a post graduate level training with a placement and a core profession such as MHN or complete another component of training and you have to reaccredit each year with the possibility of audit of practice at any time. You're completely right that the term "therapist" is unprotected and it's pretty scary seeing some of the therapy offered and some poorly or untrained therapists happy to tackle problems that the properly trained and supervised therapists would know was beyond their skills and expertise.

@VaseHalfFull you're absolutely right to question that behaviour from your therapist. It's on the list of No-Nos along with accepting SM contact from present or former clients or accepting friends as clients. There are many other ethical issues that therapists have to consider during their training and ethical practice is a pretty big component of training as it should be considering the vulnerability of clients who put their trust in us.

The fact your therapist has done that and obviously doesn't realise it's a problem suggests a lack of training. As others have said, given the lack of barriers to calling yourself a therapist the best road to finding a therapist is probably via the Profession Standards Authority where you will find the BACP (counsellors and psychotherapists) BABCP (CBT therapists) HCPC (clinical psychologists). I think there are other organisations one the PSA site such as the body for Drama Therapists etc. With the BACP and BABCP (the organisations I know the best), it's not just being a member, you need to chose someone who is also accredited. It doesn't mean they will be perfect but it does mean they will have had more training and many hours of close supervision with a requirement in the case of the BABCP that both training and supervision records are proven each year (not sure about BACP).

The problem is that if you want to report someone to their professional body they've got to be part of one. The dodgy therapists who have done a weekend course don't have anywhere you can complain to. It's an absolute minefield for people looking for ethical and safe support.

To be fair, it isn't a minefield really, because the advertising directories only allow therapists who are members of professional organisations such as listed by pp above. But it's a problem if you're finding a therapist through notice boards or leaflets or websites/googling.

I'm not so sure @Underthere. Not all the online commercial therapist directories are that choosy about who they list. Often the commercially minded "therapists" with slick websites full of "cure" promises are the ones people see first on social media and how is a potential client meant to know what is legitimate and even what organisations are legitimate? Just thinking from a client perspective who is looking for therapy for the first time, it is tricky.