I’ll try to keep this short as a lot has happened in my relationship and I think I’ve been gaslit to the point where I’m not even sure if I’m overreacting or not
Been with DP for two years and we are due to get married next week.
a year ago I discovered he had been messaging a woman on instagram. Nothing really flirty from his side but it was obvious she was interested. He does a sport and she watches apparently. He said things like he would let her know when he was playing next etc. I think he liked the attention of it all but was also clear with her that he was in a relationship. I stupidly let it slide because he showed me all messages etc and I thought he had just got caught up in it 🤦🏻♀️
since then I have discovered he follows lots of OF models on instagram etc. We have had 6 separate conversations about me not being comfortable with it. He says he will remove them, I discover he hasn’t and an argument happens because he is not respecting my wishes. I’m not controlling but not happy with him liking and following naked women online.
He had added some women on his PlayStation. I asked for them to be removed and he said he would. I went to play on mine the other day and they came up as suggested friends/we had mutual friends. He then gaslit me saying I had got it wrong until I made him load it up and showed him. He then started saying how he didn’t know how they got there.
Lately he has been saying things like “oh that lady in the shop said you were punching” etc. Basically negging me. I did this when we went shopping for his wedding suit and last week when I ended up in hospital he asked if the nurse prepping me for potential surgery had asked who the Adonis with me was.
The final straw came when I heard him on a work call saying it was important to see the photo of who they were interviewing, basically wanting to interview the ones who look nice/pretty. I even heard a colleague say “typical X acting like a red blooded 20 year old again” so he must have form for doing/saying these things at work
After this last incident I just feel numb inside. Not angry, just like I don’t give a fuck. It might be something small but I think it’s the straw that broke the camels back
For some background I have also recently had 3 consecutive miscarriages. One that landed me in hospital seriously ill. I’ve told him several times that these experiences have left me hating myself. I do not have a good relationship with my body right now but I’m not sure if this is making me blow everything out of proportion.
He is always with me, does whatever I need him to do. Always saying he loves me etc and was amazing during my miscarriages. However he doesn’t seem interested in how I feel now and does all this stupid shit