Is this something I need to confess?

[Chinchin34]

Long story short-

ex and I broke up 6 months ago. In between I had a couple weeks ‘fling’ with another guy who always had a thing for me, FWB type fling. He wanted a relationship with me but to be honest I didn’t like him like that. During my last relationship this man had made a few moves to show he liked me by texting, speaking to me on nights out etc so my ex didn’t like him.

my ex and I are trying to work things out. I know he will be so upset about this fling of mine but I feel like I have to tell him and just gave the consequences? I know we weren’t together and im sure he maybe had some dates but this particular man has been sniffing about me for some time. I wish I had never went there.

Would you confess this in the spirit of being open and honest and trying to move forward together? I also don’t even know if we will be able to make this work but we are spending time together now and it’s been lovely but I feel like I have a bit secret and feel so guilty

Don't volunteer it. If he asks (which is a red flag in itself) then either tell him that it's none of his business, or at most point out you were single and 'dated a bit'. Or something along those lines. Definitely don't go into specifics, and don't mention this particular man. It's no different now than if you'd just met for the first time, everyone's sexual past should stay there, rarely can any good come of discussing previous partners sexually.

The only caveat would be if you think the ex fwb would tell the man that you're trying to get back together with (and there's probably a reasonable chance of that from what you've said). In that case, you may want to get in first to neutralise the 'bad news'.

😅