Would you meet up with an ex who said this...

[Nanya81]

I've been made aware through a mutual friend that my ex is considering getting in contact to ask if I'd like to meet for a coffee now that time has passed. We broke up 2.5 years ago after more than five years together, when he discarded me out of the blue, telling me he'd never been in love with me, ever, but knew I was in love with him, and some other cold words.

My heart skipped a beat when I heard this. I don't know what he wants, but I really still don't want any contact, even though I'm long over him now. I know people say you can become friends with an ex after time has passed, but I really don't want this. Am I being reasonable or not?

He sounds like a dick, you don't want to see him, surely that is enough reason to just not engage.

YANBU
His life didnt turn out how he expected after he walked so now he wants a shag to rekindle a friendship??

No, don't meet him. It sounds like he ended it callously, so doesn't deserve any more of your time.

Lol, no you're not.

Tell him to go fuck himself.

And watch the mutual friend isn't shit stirring.

an ex only gets in touch for one reason and one reason only! he's single! tell your friend you are not interested.. and don't give him another thought

Don't be his ego boost.

Tellthe mutual friend you'd rather take a bath in cat piss than meet up with him.

No

You owe him nothing. Ignore

The person he dumped you for has now dumped him. So he thought he'd come sniffing around again.

Thanks, all. It took me a long time to bounce back after this, his words hurt me a lot, but I'm in a good place now, but just because time has passed I don't feel like wiping the slate clean, if that makes sense.

He hasn’t earned any right to attention from you. He sowed poison when he broke up with you, there’s no reason for him to think he’ll be reaping roses.
Don’t waste a single second on him.

What a bloody cheek.

Tell mutual friend " not gonna happen " and you can feed that back to him.

Don't let him back in please.

You have every right to completely ignore that fuckwit if he gets in touch.

Especially since he’s sent the mutual friend on some kind of fishing trip to test the waters before he risks a message.

If he isn’t already blocked do it now so you don’t even have to waste time reading any disingenuous BS he flings your way.

💐

Just no

Just no
plus you don’t need a fwend

He's not worth the mind space you've given him.

I wouldn't engage at all. He's using the mutual friend as a sounding board to gauge your response. He knows what he did was despicable. He wants to know if you still think so. He'd rather get a negative reply from the friend than flat-out rejection from you.

Tbh, he sounds like a dick and a coward. He was then, and he is being true to form and playing to his strengths now.

How good does it feel though. He smirked in your face that you clearly loved him, but he never felt that about you, then fucked off...and now you get to turn him down.

"I'm just too busy at the moment"

Because no one is ever too busy for someone they care about. And he'll know that. Ha.

I would never wish to have contact with a man again if he discarded me out of the blue. Please find your dignity, self confidence and tell him that you wont be meeting him.
Dont lose that good place that you are in. He will mess with your head and isnt worthy of your head space. You are better than scraps.

Nah, whoever he dumped you for has dumped him and he reckons you're a safe bet for a shag out of gratitude that he's remembered you exist.

I've been in a similar situation, I agreed to stupidly give it a second go. It was a lot more painful when it inevitably went wrong again. Tell him to get fucked.

Don't give him another second of your life, and don't think you have to prove something by seeing him again - much better not to.

Just "No thank you."

You know what. I’d go. I’ve had several exes call me up for a “coffee”. (Generally I stay friends with exes but not the ones who have really hurt me or been mean)

so yeah, I go. Looking lovely, smiling, happy, all friendly, stay for just 30 mins, leave them wanting more. Then afterwards, when I get the “so good to see you today” text… I ghost the bastards back!!!! Ha!!!! Have that!!! Now I’m the one who got away!

I mean only do the above if you feel strong enough to let it go and not catch feelings of course. It’s probably not good advice tbh, but it does help me 😂

Why do you need to ask?

It'll be minutes of your life you'll never get back.

You don't want this - you've said it. He's clearly banking on you being heart broken and pining for him. I'd wait for him to message, leave a day or so for him to stew and then respond with "Sorry, who is this?" then if you have time and inclination pretend you think it is a spam message and ask him, if it is him to prove it by posting what he said to you the last time you saw him...