My boyfriend seems upset that I went away on holiday to see my son who is studying abroad

[PeachLion]

I have been divorced for 5 years and have a son who has been studying in Montreal since August. I hadn't seen him since he left and I have just spent the most amazing holiday with him here in Canada.
The only problem is that my boyfriend (I don't live with him but we have been together for 5 years) seems really upset that I have been away without him. He hasn't said it directly but every time I ring him he seems cold, almost angry. Almost like he is jealous that I'm here with my son. He couldn't afford to come and had to stay with his daughters (who aren't very nice to me !) He never took any interest in my trip before I left, but he doesn't seem to be happy for me, unlike all my friends and family.
I'm a bit worried about going back home to be honest!
I just needed a bit of advice... Is this normal behaviour?

Does he live with you? He is acting like a child and I would be telling him that you need your independence. If he doesn't like it he can move on. You DS comes before any man.

He’s 100% jealous, and sulking.

He couldn't afford to come and had to stay with his daughters (who aren't very nice to me!)

Why would he have to stay with his daughters because he couldn’t afford to go to Canada with you?

Yes that's worrying behaviour from him.

Take the blinders off. This is your cue to dump him.

Red flags. Sulky and manipulative. He should be happy for you and supportive of a trip to see your son.

Why did he have to stay with his DD’s?

100% this. You don't have to put up with this kind of bullshit, tell him it's not going to work out, your son is your number 1 priority and you don't need a man baby

If he doesn't live with you, why has he had to stay with his DDs?

But yes, it is worrying behaviour. He sounds jealous and bitter that you've gone to see your DS and have been having a lovely time, which is not the behaviour of someone who loves you and wishes you well. I would take a long hard look at this relationship, if I were you, and decide if you want it to continue. Have there perhaps been other things that concern you about his behaviour, or is this the first time that you've shown a bit of independence? For instance, controlling people don't like it when their DP goes off and does something without them, particularly when they then have a jolly good time doing it. Do you think he's controlling?

I finished with a boyfriend who was sulky and needy when I went away on a holiday I’d booked long before I met him. It completely spoiled the trip for me and I really hated that he tried to make me feel bad for going away. Very selfish behaviour.

I could not be arsed with a boyfriend who can't find it in himself to be happy for me.

This sounds very much like a "his" problem
Don't make it yours

Keep contact to a minimum if you must

Deal with it when you get back because it's likely to still be here.

Off topic but is it McGill? I had the best year of my life there if so, and Montreal is an amazing city

Exactly what I was going to ask, what has you going on holiday got to do with him staying with his daughters? Where does he usually live?

It’s very odd behaviour to be annoyed about someone’s holiday, has he shown sulky tendencies before?

He's a jealous, controlling bastard, thank god you don't live with him.

yeah that would be something that would give me the ick.

A grown man sulking because you went to see your son.

Tbh, if his DD's are not very nice to you after 5 years, are they ever going to be, and do you want that constantly in your life fo the foreseeable? Does your BF challenge them on their behaviour to you or take a back seat on it? What behaviour have they shown you? Also, do they have cause, was he perhaps still with their mother when you met? If not and you came after, he should be having words with them.
Apart from that, your life and finances are very much separate, so it's not your problem if he can't afford to go with you. His circumstances are not your fault, so don't accept his sulking, he has no grounds.

Jealousy, resentment and not being pleased that your loved one is doing something nice strongly suggests that he's an immature and unpleasant man.

I would also question that he couldn't afford a trip to Canada and that indicative that he's a big fat loser with low finances.

You can do so much better.

🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩

Ditch him. He’s trying to ruin your trip. Arsehole!

Grown men sulking is so unattractive. Ditch him

Dump him for a Mounty.

Fuck that. My husband quite often used to see his son and I think it's wonderful the relationship they have.
Yes I would want to go to Canada (and I would want to see DSS) in your circumstances. But if I couldn't afford to I would 100% be pleased that DH could go.

He sounds controlling. Red flag. You should be able to visit your son without shit from a boyfriend who seems jealous and immature. You are worth more OP. Think about moving on without him.

@PeachLion, he is not invested in your happiness, and is hoping to unsettle you and sabotage your trip. Bin him immediately.

Dump. seriously get rid of the sulking man child. I lived in Canada for many years , and just over a year ago retired to dominican republic. I was up in Canada a month ago for a week at our daughters .. my husband is up there right now, due back tomorrow. Cannot go together thanks to two big sappy standard poodles. I am heading up in late July or early August for what was to be a week, my husband told me that we should book me two weeks as I may not be able to go for a while as our residency here means after september I cannot leave the country until granted.. could be 6 weeks, could be 8 months. So I doing 2 weeks. And a loving partner would NEVER begrudge you time with your child. again. DUMP THE MAN CHILD

He’s jealous of you, you don’t get along with his kids. Sounds like a non- starter. Surprised it’s lasted this long.