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Original poster

Splitting up over student finance

129 replies

samsonthecat · 03/04/2024 17:57

I’m in bits. Dp of 5 years who lives with me will not allow me to add him to DD student finance application. The rules say I have to give his details as household income. The only way out I can see is that he moves out and we are over.
i am heartbroken and would like a hand hold please.

OP posts:
DoreenonTill8 · 03/04/2024 18:00

Are you expecting dp to fund the student?

YesThatsATurdOnTheRug · 03/04/2024 18:01

Why on earth not..? That's very odd, I'm not sure how you get round that one. Like you say, if he's really insistent he will have to move out, you could call them and ask for advice though?

Original poster
samsonthecat · 03/04/2024 18:01

No, I can fund the excess and also her father will. I just have to include his income details as household income.

OP posts:
NotStayingIn · 03/04/2024 18:01

What would be the negative impact on him? As in, what is he concerned about?

YesThatsATurdOnTheRug · 03/04/2024 18:01

DoreenonTill8 · 03/04/2024 18:00

Are you expecting dp to fund the student?

It's a requirement of the finance to give details of any live in partner, it doesn't mean he's paying for anything.

atomicnotsoblonde · 03/04/2024 18:02

No the government expects 'households' to support them. It's a rubbish system and I'm sorry xx

Portish · 03/04/2024 18:02

I've always thought it was optional to put both incomes. A higher household income means a lower student loan which means the student has less debt but has to be supported by parent(s) or a job. A single, lower income might mean a higher or full student loan given so the student has more debt but doesn't have to rely on parental help or a job. When my child was university aged friends of hers did one or the other. I suppose it comes down to your child having the majority of debt or you using your savings. I've no idea if it's legal or illegal?

Happyboom · 03/04/2024 18:03

I know you have to, but it does seem very odd to me that someone is expected to fund a student just because lives with her parent.

The "household income" thing is probably something you should have discussed before he moved in, but I can understand why he doesn't want to be on it. Yes, he'll need to move out if he won't do it. Does that need to mean you're over?

somptuosité · 03/04/2024 18:04

We didn’t put anything because DS was going for the minimum loan.

How much is your DD entitled to with your household income?

If you don’t put anything she still gets the minimum anyway.

Original poster
samsonthecat · 03/04/2024 18:04

Portish · 03/04/2024 18:02

I've always thought it was optional to put both incomes. A higher household income means a lower student loan which means the student has less debt but has to be supported by parent(s) or a job. A single, lower income might mean a higher or full student loan given so the student has more debt but doesn't have to rely on parental help or a job. When my child was university aged friends of hers did one or the other. I suppose it comes down to your child having the majority of debt or you using your savings. I've no idea if it's legal or illegal?

Yes she would get more loan on just my income but I have to give his income as he lives with us. He thinks I should lie and say I am single which is fraud and I refuse to do it as DD may have her funding removed.

OP posts:
WaitingfortheTardis · 03/04/2024 18:04

It makes me think he could be hiding something, otherwise it really is a very simple, normal thing to do and his reaction is very odd.

BigBoysDontCry · 03/04/2024 18:05

Does he have something to hide? That would be my first thought.

somptuosité · 03/04/2024 18:06

Just leave it blank and she can get the minimum loan and you and her DD can make up the difference. Maybe with your DP’s income the minimum is all she would get anyway.

Notinthemood12 · 03/04/2024 18:07

Just do what’s best financially, how do they know you have a live in partner?

Notinthemood12 · 03/04/2024 18:08

Oh just saw you don’t want to do fraud. IMO these loans people are the real fraudsters

Zwicky · 03/04/2024 18:10

How much over the minimum would she get with both your incomes?

boozeclues · 03/04/2024 18:11

I wouldn’t get so worked up about it, you are not married, who is going know any different?

He obviously doesn’t want her to be linked to him as some kind of dependant, given she his not his daughter, is about to turn 18 and has barely been in her life.

titchy · 03/04/2024 18:12

somptuosité · 03/04/2024 18:06

Just leave it blank and she can get the minimum loan and you and her DD can make up the difference. Maybe with your DP’s income the minimum is all she would get anyway.

Yes this.

Pinkpinkpink15 · 03/04/2024 18:13

I don't understand why he wouldn't just give his details??

it only affects how much DD gets, it doesn't affect him. Does he understand that HE won't be asked for anything, from anyone, he's not liable for her loan.

he has to be misunderstanding what this means or there's just no reason to refuse.

could you instead put him down as a lodger?

NigellaAwesome · 03/04/2024 18:13

Can you not just say that he refused to provide details? It will mean your DD will only be eligible for the minimum loan though.

Springtime789 · 03/04/2024 18:14

somptuosité · 03/04/2024 18:06

Just leave it blank and she can get the minimum loan and you and her DD can make up the difference. Maybe with your DP’s income the minimum is all she would get anyway.

I agree with doing this.

Limelemonx · 03/04/2024 18:15

If both your incomes add up to over £60000 you only get minimum loan anyway so just apply for minimum loan and leave all income details blank?

Lovelyview · 03/04/2024 18:15

Have you spoken to student finance about it? Could you put your exes name and finance details on for the purposes of the application? She would get a basic loan if you didn't put your details on at all. Would you & your ex be able to fund the rest of her university costs if that happened? Why is your DP being so odd about it?

OwlCityisthemostunderrated · 03/04/2024 18:15

Didn’t you have discussions about finances before he moved in? There are a lot of things where household income is counted. If he didn’t want to be financially linked to you, he shouldn’t have moved in.

On the other hand, why does it mean your relationship is over just because he moves out? (I would understand you wanting to LTB because he is being an arse, but it’s not mandatory).

Gaggley · 03/04/2024 18:16

Don't lie and say that you are single, it is very likely that you will be found out. My friend's ex partner was still on the electoral roll at her house, and when her son applied for student finance they investigated.

DD applied for a loan just for tuition fees and not for living expenses. We did not have to fill in any information about our household income as a consequence. This could be an alternative to splitting up? Only works if you and other relatives are able / happy to support your child at university. DD also works in holidays, which helps too.