One testicle

[Englishman2024]

Hello all,

Due to a birth defect I was born with one ball/nut/testicle. Whatever you want to call it.

I have went on to be a father without any difficulty. I don't take that for granted after reading some threads on here. I was fitted with a prosthetic in my teens.

I've had 2 long term relationships but both of them never knew. Or if they did, they didn't mention it. I've had casual encounters and nobody has said anything afterwards. I've never confided in it to anyone. Maybe I feel ashamed even though it isn't my fault.

When I went to get a vasectomy obviously I had to tell them because it impacts the procedure. The surgeon was impressed about how good a job that was done with the prosthetic. I think he was referring to the way it looks and feels.

Other than the prosthetic and the initial investigation when I was very small, I haven't needed any medical input. Out of curiosity I tested my testosterone and it was quite high.

I think I've lived a normal life and it hasn't really impacted on me so far. The way I look and function is normal.

Question is, 1) would this put you off a long term relationship if you knew?

2. Should I mention it to any future partners and if so when? Or should I just keep living as I am.

Thanks for listening, any comments welcome, good and bad.

I'm in a long-term relationship, but something like that wouldn't have put me off a man.

You don't need to tell anyone about it (yes, tell them about the vasectomy, of course). You are no different to any other man.

Anyone that would reconsider a relationship for something like that needs to go in the bin anyway - it’s a non-issue.

I don't think you need to tell any future partner.

If you've got a prosthetic I doubt anyone would even notice. Women do not care about men's balls as much as men care about their balls.

For you, you’ve had a vasectomy so it doesn’t matter but for others, mention it if children are possibly wanted in the future, and this should be mentioned very soon into the relationship.

Otherwise it’s a non issue.

Other than the prosthetic and the initial investigation when I was very small, I haven't needed any medical input

May I ask, were you not advised to freeze your sperm when you reached adolescence in case of injury to your remaining testicle during sports, etc?

A friend's young grandson was born with this condition and that's what they've been advised.

It wouldn't put me off at all, and I don't think you need to say anything. It won't affect anything. Hopefully if you get into a trusting relationship you'll mention it, but only so that it isn't on your mind.

@Westfacing That was never mentioned for me but good they are thinking of that thesedays

Thank you.

I'm glad you became a father with no problems - now that you've had long term relationships and a vasectomy I don't think you need mention it to any future partner.

Thanks for all the replies. For some reason I was worried when I pressed the post button!

I hope my story and the replies can give comfort to parents whose son's go through this, that they can be happy and have normal relationships, become dads themselves.

No, it wouldn't put me off. Sounds like a cliche but if it puts someone off I doubt they were the right person for you in the first place.

Up to you whether you tell anyone but personally I would probably find it pretty strange if I found out my long term Dp had something like this and had never mentioned it. I'd probably understand if he explained he was self conscious etc but I might question the trust we have in one another.

It wouldn't put me off at all, but I would find it a bit weird if you didn't mention it and then it came up after years of being in a relationship.

For that reason I would recommend mentioning it fairly early on. But I'd be surprised if anyone cares.

It wouldn't bother me in the slightest.

I only had one ovary for years and still produced ds without assistance 🙂

Wouldn't put me off. I knew a guy who only had one, he had cancer so the other was removed, it didn't stop him in the bedroom department. I didn't even notice 🫣, he then proudly showed me (and the scar).

No issue for me at all. Wouldn't have been even if I were 20.

I wouldn’t bat an eyelid, even if you didn’t have a prosthetic. Literally wouldn’t care at all!

I can't imagine any woman on earth giving a toss about your balls.

I don’t think you need to tell a future partner for the purpose of being transparent. There’s really no reason why this should ever be an issue.

However, if this is something you have felt some shame about throughout your life, it may be quite healing to tell a future partner. What would that be like for you?

It would not bother me either

I couldn't imagine being put off by something as minor as that but I'd want you to trust me enough to tell me at some point. I couldn't imagine for example being married to someone and them not feeling able to tell me, I'd rather honesty and authenticity.

I’ve been married to DH for 30plus years. I’m not sure I could pick him out in a line up of testes… They’re not high up on my list of attractive features in a man, I really wouldn’t give it another thought OP

I wouldn’t care at all, wouldn’t put me off. Up to you if you want to tell people or not.

I’ve had breast implants (The scars are tiny and I think they look very natural). I wouldn’t be in a rush to announce that to anyone if I were to start a new relationship. If they asked I would tell them, but I wouldn’t feel any need to let them know if they didn’t ask.

2 boyfriends with this. 1 late teens, 1 late 20s. No issue whatsoever.

Wouldn't make a single bit of difference to me.

I actually think you should mention it to future partners because it would be such a non issue for almost everyone I think and then you wouldn't have to be anxious about it at all (if you are).

I think if you lined up just the balls of all my ex partner just the balls I could not tell you whose balls belonged to whom. It’s a non issue.

if you were in a long term relationship I would say that’s on you - my appendix scar is obviously. The fact I was put in hospital by my ex is not obvious and I can choose when if and how I want to share it - if at all - and it’s my trauma, my healing not theirs.