One testicle

[Englishman2024]

Hello all,

Due to a birth defect I was born with one ball/nut/testicle. Whatever you want to call it.

I have went on to be a father without any difficulty. I don't take that for granted after reading some threads on here. I was fitted with a prosthetic in my teens.

I've had 2 long term relationships but both of them never knew. Or if they did, they didn't mention it. I've had casual encounters and nobody has said anything afterwards. I've never confided in it to anyone. Maybe I feel ashamed even though it isn't my fault.

When I went to get a vasectomy obviously I had to tell them because it impacts the procedure. The surgeon was impressed about how good a job that was done with the prosthetic. I think he was referring to the way it looks and feels.

Other than the prosthetic and the initial investigation when I was very small, I haven't needed any medical input. Out of curiosity I tested my testosterone and it was quite high.

I think I've lived a normal life and it hasn't really impacted on me so far. The way I look and function is normal.

Question is, 1) would this put you off a long term relationship if you knew?

2. Should I mention it to any future partners and if so when? Or should I just keep living as I am.

Thanks for listening, any comments welcome, good and bad.

I wouldn't give two shits if you were my chap

@TheGander That is an awful shame on both what happened in their encounter but that she died young.

Yes, maybe I shouldn’t have put that in there, it’s got nothing to do with your post and I don’t want to derail things.

@TheGander no it's fine. Sometimes it's good to get a reminder of how fragile life can be, puts things in perspective.

I haven't thought this much about testicles in a long time, if ever. So cheers for that OP.

If DP of 23 years told me today that he has one fake one, I'd have 2 thoughts.

1. How the fuck did I not notice? Then again, I don't pay them much attention anyway....

2. Why is he only telling me this now? We could've had 23 years of ball-jokes built up!

Interesting post, thanks for sharing OP.

Should you tell people?

Getting into a relationship = fine
Being in a relationship = Fine
Breaking up with somebody = probably not so fine
Ex partners all over the place = really not great

@Jk8 That's one of the reasons why I've kept it secret. Maybe I'm wrong but some of the women might use it as something to taunt me about, or tell others, if the relationship is unsuccessful. It's low to do that, below the belt -literally. But when emotions are running high people do and say cruel things.

Thanks @Dustyblue Sometimes humour is the best way of dealing with things.

Unfortunately your right. Nothing's off limits when it comes to 'getting back' at people/exs & while I wouldnt personally do it ive not unheard it which makes me cautious aswell

But it wouldn't make you look bad if someone did that - it would only make the person spreading it around look bad. Most people would be like "so what?" and "why is she even saying that?"
(Reminds me of the joke in Ballot Monkeys, "Nigel doesn't mind talking about his testicle, but please don't ask any questions about the economy")

I dated a guy with one testicle in my late teens (had one undescended), it didn't ever occur to me to think it was "odd", or ever think about it!

Please don't worry OP 😊

One testicle wouldn't worry me at all. I don't think you need to tell anyone you sleep with, but if a partner becomes long term it would be good to share then.

This.

My ex had a prosthetic and it wasn't an issue, I wouldn't have noticed if he hadn't told me

I feel like this is one of those things that men care about a lot more than women.

In an icebreaker situation "I've got one testicle" would be as remarkable as "Janet visited India last year" and "Ian has a scar on his ankle that is shaped a bit like Italy if you squint".

It's a total non-issue. If you were at a different stage in your life and seeking relationships and it would potentially affect fertility then I think you should tell them but otherwise I don't think they'd notice.

One thing I would say is that if I was in a relationship with a person for years and found this out after a long time I would be upset. All of my relationships involve emotional intimacy and closeness and sharing all the embarrassing parts of ourselves. I'm not saying we tell each other every thought we ever have but we discuss our childhood, our fears, the "deep" stuff.

If, in a long term relationship where we were living together and planning to be together for the rest of our lives, I found out my partner wasn't able to tell me something as small as this, I'd be concerned about how well I actually knew them and how comfortable they felt in opening up with me.

I'd assume, if one testicle is where they drew the line then there must be so much I don't know and that there must be a big imbalance between what I share with them and what they share with me.

It would have completely zero effect on my attraction to them or how I saw them. It's not a case of "if they love you it won't matter" - for me it's a case of it just makes absolutely zero difference to me.

@peloton2024 thanks - makes me think that nobody has noticed and it's genuinely harder than I thought to tell

Thanks so much @toothypeggys You explained that so well, definitely gave me something to think about, that perhaps next time it's time to be open

@Offthepath I still wouldn't like it, even if it said more about them than me.

I dated someone with the same. Made absolutely no difference to anything whatsoever.

Women don't care about men's balls.

My partner had testicular cancer a few years ago and had one testicle removed. I honestly forget he's only got one and it's literally made no difference to our sex life. With a new partner you could just keep it lighthearted if you need to mention it at all, and I'm sure it won't be a big deal.