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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Dh has text me from a different number.

166 replies

Sickandanxious · 15/03/2024 23:34

Please be kind. I'm sitting here feeling sick to my stomach and feeling panicky. I'm hoping that I'm mistaken and that there is an explanation for this happening.
I sent DH 2 texts one after the other with different questions. He answered the second question but not the first which I thought strange but maybe he was just busy with work.
Later he text me with a question to which I answered. A bit later just as I got home another text appeared in answer to the first question I asked.
This is what's weird. The text was from a different number!
He has recently bought new phone and changed his provider but has kept his number so how is this possible?
I didn't mention keeping my cards close to my chest MN style and hoped it would all become apparent and that it's something to do with his new phone etc.
I've had to look on his phone, the second msg he sent me isn't there so I think he may have royally fucked up and maybe he has a second sim or phone?
I know I shouldn't have looked on his phone but it's making me feel so ill.
What an I do to check? If I put the number in my phone and there's a WhatsApp attached will a photo come up and will my number then show on that phone?
I'm not at all tech savvy.
I don't think I'll sleep tonight.

OP posts:
madmumofteens · 16/03/2024 10:22

I am changing over to another provider I've been told I will be given a temporary number for 2-3 days until it reverts to my original number

Aroundthewaygirl · 16/03/2024 11:46

he asked you if he could cheat, so of course you’re anxious. And let’s not forget his female coworker as his only favorite. I would be anxious too regardless if the two phone numbers situation is “normal” phone thing or not.

Fundays12 · 16/03/2024 12:20

This happened when DH bought a new phone recently and kept his number. It took a few days to sort out

gannett · 16/03/2024 12:48

I had no idea my phone had favourite contacts. I've looked at mine and there are four. The solicitor from buying our house - three years ago. Cab firm I've used once ever, over a year ago. A name I literally don't recognise - I guess a tradesman? An old friend who doesn't live in the UK any more and I haven't spoken to in years. But not DP. Baffling!

BirthdayRainbow · 16/03/2024 14:28

Starspangledrodeopony · 16/03/2024 08:42

This thread is populated by people with similar tech skills to the OP.

If it quacks like a duck… come on now.

If you mean me I was giving an answer. Obvious it looks like he's cheating on her even without the extra information but it's best to reassure as well as point out possibly awful scenarios.

Sickandanxious · 16/03/2024 19:31

OkayKinkade · 16/03/2024 06:19

If you've been able to access his phone once, can u do it again and look if there's any untoward messages between them? I know snooping isn't great but sometimes, needs must.

Theres nothing.

OP posts:
Sickandanxious · 16/03/2024 19:38

Myopicglass · 16/03/2024 06:00

You can have a non physical sim as a second sim.

You need to check the phone to see if it has dual sims.

But I wouldn’t tell him or ask him yet. Sadly cheaters are liars and they think nothing about risking their spouses lives and fertility with stds.

The paperwork from when he got the new phone will detail the number that came with the phone. Can you find the paperwork (possibly on email)? Does that number match the one he text you from?

Yes found it and it matches. I'm thinking it's all a glitch and waiting for phone to patch through like others have said.

OP posts:
Sickandanxious · 16/03/2024 19:40

Starspangledrodeopony · 16/03/2024 06:24

Well, I suspect it’s an affair.

Does he work away a lot?

No.

OP posts:
shoppingshamed · 16/03/2024 19:42

Sickandanxious · 16/03/2024 19:38

Yes found it and it matches. I'm thinking it's all a glitch and waiting for phone to patch through like others have said.

If you've confirmed that the number is the one from the new SIM then you've proved, as most posters had already told you, that it's some kind of porting error. It's nothing more than that but your post reads like you still aren't sure

Sickandanxious · 16/03/2024 19:44

MargaretThursday · 16/03/2024 07:53

Last time dh changed provider his phone hopped between normal number and temporary one for ages.
He thought he was replying to a chain of messages, so I'd suddenly get this random looking message from a different number.

Along the lines of
Old no: home late. Can put dinner on
Me: What time?
Old no: 8.30ish, maybe 9
Me: Will put something in the oven. Not sure what we've got.
<half an hour later>
New number: casserole bottom drawer freezer left hand side

He works at the same office as Dd and they travel together and she verified that he sent them all straight after each other from his phone.

Exactly whats happened here by the looks of things.

OP posts:
Sickandanxious · 16/03/2024 19:48

lotsofquestions2 · 16/03/2024 08:09

The fact he's sent you the same message twice makes me feel like it was a crossover and he didn't realise it had gone through the first time hence texting it through again and you normally come up as a temporary number until your new number is transferred over.

It wasn't the same msg twice. It was 2 different msgs from different numbers.

OP posts:
Sickandanxious · 16/03/2024 20:39

shoppingshamed · 16/03/2024 09:27

Is a DUEL SIM phone used to arrange fights for one's honour?

That made me laugh so much😂🤣

OP posts:
pplrcray · 16/03/2024 20:55

This reply has been deleted

This has been deleted by MNHQ for breaking our Talk Guidelines.

NotQuiteNorma · 16/03/2024 21:06

Sickandanxious · 16/03/2024 19:44

Exactly whats happened here by the looks of things.

So you won't be snooping and distrustful anymore then? Great! 😃

SillySeal · 17/03/2024 14:29

My mil has this. She changed her phone about a year ago and it still happens. On her phone it shows as one conversation but on mine I can get replies from her actual number or her "temporary " one. It's rather strange. The phone company said it should atop after a month but it never did. According to her it only happens when she sends messages to myself, dh and 2 other people. It maybe completely innocent, especially if he's answering your messages.

Maybe ask if you can see how the conversation looks from his phone.

Garlicnaan · 17/03/2024 14:59

Who is the favourites person?

Maybe ask him, "who's X?" And see what he says.

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