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Original poster

I am the ‘crazy’ abusive ex

85 replies

Pompomtree · 13/02/2024 20:01

I am the crazy ex.

I am the completely unreasonable woman that drove him to cheat repeatedly. I was just so awful. I am the reason he left his children and hardly sees them. I am unhinged and make his life unnecessarily hard.

This is what the other women thought of me at the time. Any one else been in this club?

OP posts:
YetMoreNewBeginnings · 13/02/2024 20:02

Me. I’m the psycho crazy ex that “trapped” him with pregnancy that was achieved by expensive IVF that he paid for

Onceuponaheartache · 13/02/2024 20:08

Yep, I am the crazy ex who shagged anything with a penis and a pulse (including my friends dad) took out imaginary loans against his house, ran up shit loads of debt and fucked off causing him to loose his house.

Unfortunately people including my best mate and my sisters best friend believed him.

I kept my silence for years until something was said that could have resulted in me loosing my job. At that point I broadcast to the world that he was a violent, financially abusive rapist who ran up thousands of pounds worth of debt, refused to work, cancelled all his work insurance (self employed), didn't pay his taxes or NI contributions who then threatened court action and would have taken our house unless I paid it all out of inheritance and my credit cards and then spent the following 10 years trying to pay it all back.

There are still people who buy his BS.

He is back living with his first wife (who did cheat on him) and frankly she is fucking welcome to lying sack of shit.

Original poster
Pompomtree · 13/02/2024 21:05

@Onceuponaheartache I am sos sorry you have been through all of that. I have no words for his behaviour. What a remarkably strong amazing women you are though.

OP posts:
Original poster
Pompomtree · 13/02/2024 21:06

@YetMoreNewBeginnings how can anyone buy that absolute nonsense he has spouted. The facts speak for themselves.

OP posts:
WillYouPutYourCoatOn · 13/02/2024 21:08

Pompomtree · 13/02/2024 21:06

@YetMoreNewBeginnings how can anyone buy that absolute nonsense he has spouted. The facts speak for themselves.

The same reason we fell for it. These abysmal c*nts are superb actors.

Original poster
Pompomtree · 13/02/2024 21:10

@WillYouPutYourCoatOn good point!

OP posts:
cocavino · 13/02/2024 21:18

Yes, according to my ex! It's hard to know who believes him and who doesn't. Fortunately, my partner (whom my ex tried to warn) didn't believe it!

Onceuponaheartache · 13/02/2024 22:31

Onceuponaheartache · 13/02/2024 20:08

Yep, I am the crazy ex who shagged anything with a penis and a pulse (including my friends dad) took out imaginary loans against his house, ran up shit loads of debt and fucked off causing him to loose his house.

Unfortunately people including my best mate and my sisters best friend believed him.

I kept my silence for years until something was said that could have resulted in me loosing my job. At that point I broadcast to the world that he was a violent, financially abusive rapist who ran up thousands of pounds worth of debt, refused to work, cancelled all his work insurance (self employed), didn't pay his taxes or NI contributions who then threatened court action and would have taken our house unless I paid it all out of inheritance and my credit cards and then spent the following 10 years trying to pay it all back.

There are still people who buy his BS.

He is back living with his first wife (who did cheat on him) and frankly she is fucking welcome to lying sack of shit.

Edited

No, not strong. Just had no choice but to carry on.

As women we do ourselves as massive disservice to proclaim strength in these situations.

We are scarred, and broken and that has to be acknowledged or we end up doing eternal damage to our mental health.

It took a long time to work through things, but I have and I am mostly healed.

But I am not strong my lovely.

PyongyangKipperbang · 13/02/2024 23:23

Me.

I made him cheat by not simply ignoring the fact that he cheated. By getting angry and upset about it and making him face and admit to what he did, I made him do it.

No, I dont understand either, this logic requires at least a time machine! But he is absolutely convinced of his narrative. If I ever said "But I didnt get angry about you cheating until AFTER you cheated" he would say (wish I was joking) "Oh very convenient".....I dont understand that either.

Doyoubelievehim · 14/02/2024 09:01

I will be very soon the crazy ex because I'm done with his nonsense. Not yet sure what the stories about me will be but doubt it will be pretty, based on what he told me about his other exes.

Doyoubelievehim · 14/02/2024 09:02

PyongyangKipperbang · 13/02/2024 23:23

Me.

I made him cheat by not simply ignoring the fact that he cheated. By getting angry and upset about it and making him face and admit to what he did, I made him do it.

No, I dont understand either, this logic requires at least a time machine! But he is absolutely convinced of his narrative. If I ever said "But I didnt get angry about you cheating until AFTER you cheated" he would say (wish I was joking) "Oh very convenient".....I dont understand that either.

Makes total sense 😂. You're so lucky he is no longer in your life

YetMoreNewBeginnings · 14/02/2024 09:39

Pompomtree · 13/02/2024 21:06

@YetMoreNewBeginnings how can anyone buy that absolute nonsense he has spouted. The facts speak for themselves.

In my exes case because he is extremely convincing and manipulative.

He has had children with two women after me. I trapped him… The one he married turned psycho after being married... The one after that went mental during pregnancy…

He has no contact with any of his 7 children, not even my adult two, yet he apparently has another new girlfriend who has been taken in by him and she’s going to help him fight for access to his children despite the fact he’s never been stopped seeing any of them

SoRainbowRhythms · 14/02/2024 10:03

I'm the horrible ex wife who didn't want to join in his hobbies that I have no interest in, so he had to do them alone. Poor lamb.

I'm the horrible ex wife who was incapable of mindreading and shouldn't have been surprised when he suddenly left one day.

Oh, and I'm also the horrible ex wife who was upfront about not wanting children from day 1, a thing he was also set on and very vocal about, but it turns out he does and just went along with it. Such a victim

Watchkeys · 14/02/2024 13:15

Try to get him to have sex with a man. You'll find out how hard it is to get someone to have sex when they don't want to.

HeChokedOnAChorizo · 14/02/2024 13:24

Not as bad as some of these, but my EXDP had an EA with a mutual friend that was bordering on turning physical, it only didnt because i found out. Anyway, EXDP and "friend" told her boyfriend all sorts of lies that i wasnt to be listened to as i "was a basket case".

Bloody rude, i was saner than the lot of them.

Boyfriend was nice enough, he has the IQ of an OXO cube but was generally ok and believed their bullshit. Didnt think it was odd that me and ex were "having problems" and i suddenly cut friend off after a 10 year friendship.

trythisforsize · 14/02/2024 13:24

Crazy ex club member here too.

I was the fishwife that was 'unreasonable and controlling' because I challenged that he stayed out after work (bar manager) till 4/5/6am 5 nights a week and came home pissed and coked up and fell asleep fully dressed on the settee when we had a 5 year old to raise.

I was 'crazy' because I insisted that doing coke and drinking every day was not conducive to family life. I was crazy and he was going to 'tell everyone what a misery I make his life'.

He did.

Various people I vaguely know that he worked with avoid me and eye me in a strangely cautious way even all these years later.

roses321 · 14/02/2024 13:35

Member of the club too.

I made him cheat. I made him trap me in rooms. It was because I was mentally unstable and expected too much.

He was angry because I started the arguments by expecting things from him.

I don't know how to even live with myself anymore to be honest. Life is so awful without him.... I went for a facial last weekend and for a mini break with my friend instead of spending my weekend crying over him.

How will I ever cope with what I've done to him. I also need to mention I'm a narcissist for leaving him and my new name is apparently Amber Heard because I reported his abuse to the police.

I'm still trying to forgive myself.

HippyCritical · 14/02/2024 13:39

I'm the horrible ex wife who didn't want to join in his hobbies that I have no interest in, so he had to do them alone. Poor lamb.

Same, except he wasn't alone. If I didn't go along I was wrong. If I did go along he'd make sure it was hell for me and I'd still be in the wrong.

He eventually (thank God) left to be with his new supply and to start a business with this hobby. The poor things haven't even reached the dizzy heights of mediocrity with this 'business', he's working in a shop now. All that education that was better than mine, all those 'beautiful people' who could get him places and he's reduced to working in a shop. Oh how the might have fallen, he didn't even like shopping in shops, unless they were in Savile Row and opened for him and him alone. In his dreams.

I know he has told people all manner of lies about me, he was doing it right in front of me when we were still together. Those who matter to me know it's not true, those who think it's true don't matter to me.

SoRainbowRhythms · 14/02/2024 13:40

HippyCritical · 14/02/2024 13:39

I'm the horrible ex wife who didn't want to join in his hobbies that I have no interest in, so he had to do them alone. Poor lamb.

Same, except he wasn't alone. If I didn't go along I was wrong. If I did go along he'd make sure it was hell for me and I'd still be in the wrong.

He eventually (thank God) left to be with his new supply and to start a business with this hobby. The poor things haven't even reached the dizzy heights of mediocrity with this 'business', he's working in a shop now. All that education that was better than mine, all those 'beautiful people' who could get him places and he's reduced to working in a shop. Oh how the might have fallen, he didn't even like shopping in shops, unless they were in Savile Row and opened for him and him alone. In his dreams.

I know he has told people all manner of lies about me, he was doing it right in front of me when we were still together. Those who matter to me know it's not true, those who think it's true don't matter to me.

Ditto! His (suspected) new supply likes to do the same things as him. Let's hope he doesn't fall foul to another crazy woman eh?

vidflex · 14/02/2024 13:45

I'm the crazy ex from 27 years ago. I was a prolific cheat, was a closet lesbian and was meeting strangers for sex.

Funnily enough his second wife was a cheat too. This one slept with every person she worked with.

Third wife has just apparently run off with someone from her gym. She's took all his money too.

lol!

In reality he's a nasty abusive Pervy gambling addict who's never been able to take any kind of criticism or blame.

roses321 · 14/02/2024 13:50

I'm starting to wonder what the issue was with the COVID pandemic when the utter twat of a man pandemic hasn't even been reported on?

Should I contact John Hopkins university to start doing the tally?

scoobs321 · 14/02/2024 13:55

Mine has written a book about our divorce and our subsequent family court and crown court dealings for non payment of child maintenance. Apparently he is self publishing. I wonder if I should ask for a signed copy 😜

GN637 · 14/02/2024 13:58

Me too.

HippyCritical · 14/02/2024 13:58

SoRainbowRhythms · 14/02/2024 13:40

Ditto! His (suspected) new supply likes to do the same things as him. Let's hope he doesn't fall foul to another crazy woman eh?

Show quote history

Oh, the classic mirroring tactic. Let's hope he's met his match!

LifeAtForty · 14/02/2024 13:59

Member here too!

I am the crazy ex wife who drove him to drink and drugs.

I’m crazy because taking cocaine all night long and sleeping all day, whilst abdicating any parental duties is completely fair.

I’m crazy because I lost all love and respect for him after he left all household duties and raising our children solely to me. I'm crazy because the resentment built so much that I no longer found him attractive. I’m crazy because I didn’t give him access to my body for his sexual whims whenever he wanted. I’m crazy because I put our children’s needs before him.

I’m crazy because I kicked him out and have never looked back.