Husband doesn't want me to let my hair go grey when I'm older

[Orestesa]

I am in my 30s. I was commenting to my husband about some aunts, in their late 60s and early 70s, who have gone fully grey. I think their grey hair looks great on them and they look really stylish. They wear colourful clothes that go well with grey.

I told my husband this, and said 'i hope I look like that when I'm older'.

Then he said he doesn't want me to go grey in my 70s and thinks i should dye it. I said he can't stop me. Then he said if I went fully grey, he wouldn't be happy about it.

How many husbands would object to their wife going grey in her 70s?

Erm yeah, that's why men never leave their wives for younger women 🤔

I wouldn't worry too much, my DH is 77 now, if I passed him in the street, I think he would recognise me but day to day around the house, I'm pretty sure he rarely actually looks at me in any detail. Now if his dog looked even slightly different or one of his chickens lost a feather, that would be a different matter altogether. In any case we've rubbed along for best part of 50 years now so he knows that his opinion should only be given if asked for

Well to be fair, you raised the topic not him. & he answered your comment. Its not as if he started talking about your hair out of the blue. His opinion doesn't have to be the same as yours. This is much ado about nothing, when the time comes both of you will likely do as you please with your hair

How can you possibly shag this idiot?

Mine actually doesn't care. Anymore than I care about him going bald (which he doesn't care about either). We wanted to get old together, so it's something to celebrate.

Definitely insist he keeps a full head of luxurious hair

Op I would let it go. It was a passing conversation. Many possible changes lie ahead…childbirth aging weight gain health issues hair loss. Hopefully you both will be healthy and hair color will be a very small part of your relationship. I’m grey. I’m under 60 have been grey for 4 years it’s so so pretty I love it and honestly so does everyone else! You will know if it’s for you when the time comes. And as with every relationship make sure he’s not trying to always dictate the what when how. Be yourself and be assertive.

Tell him he must never get grey pubes then.

That's lovely. I don't want mine to stop dying his eyebrows so we're probably as bad as each other!

Why on earth does he get an opinion? Maybe tell him you hope he doesn’t go bald or get a flopping old man bum.

The shallow ones with ridiculously sexist ideas might think that way. Decent ones don't.

Of the various haircuts I've had over the years, my DP's favourite was the Pringle shingle (a slightly shorter version of this https://i.pinimg.com/originals/bf/ad/44/bfad445e49405ffe30c3841b3566e6be.jpg) but he he's not bothered whether its long or short and wouldnt dream of having any influence on it. His only comment on my changing hair colour has been idle curiosity about whether I'd get a silver streak or more of a tabby effect, he doesn't care that it's happening.

I am blonde but dyed mine silver (while shitfaced drunk) Christmas Eve 2023. It originally went pale blue and made me resemble an eyed My Little Pony, but the silver really suits me. I don’t especially want to bleach my hair to that extent any more but DH loved the silver and told me I “Look like a husky!” (High praise from him!) It made my eyes super blue.

What else won’t he like as your body ages?

He sounds like an arse. Does he seriously think that either of you can avoid the ageing process?

I'm 57 and pretty grey now. DH is 60 and totally grey. Neither of us gives a crap.

Your husband is an arse.

I will be a blonde till my dyeing day 😆
I know my husband wouldn’t like me to go grey, although he’d never say a word.
He has quite a bit of grey but still has all his hair; he’s a handsome man who has aged really well. He’s 57.

Luckily my hubby doesn't mind thank goodness because it started early for me and hair dye doesn't stick on a fair bit now

I've never dated a bald manas it happens.Tell him if goes bald he must get a transplant, use prevention treatments or wear a wig, otherwise you won't be happy 😂

I have seen some women 'ban' their male partner from having a pony tail or growing a beard, or wear a t shirt with a hole, or have to not wear certain shoes

If it was a random comment I would think it's odd but if I bring up a topic with my husband I don't expect a certain answer then complain it is not what I want

You're absolutely right darling.

Given the confidence and entitlement with which he delivered his sermon, I doubt his twattish self importance is restricted to just this topic.

This isn't about what your hair will look like in 40 years time. This is him trying to make you insecure about your looks. Why does he think he gets a say?

Brilliant

Id have just replied “Yeah, you’re right. I don’t want you to go bald or recede either. And toupees are cheating!”

Dick…