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Original poster

Guy on OLD asked to message him an interesting fact

106 replies

Puffpuffpuff · 13/01/2024 10:50

To see if women read his profile to the end, the last sentence of his blurb asked to tell him an interesting fact.

Maybe filtering out bots?

Would you find this fun or twattish and which fact would you share with him if any?

It irked me because he sounded too experienced and strategic at OLD and I wanted someone new on the scene like me and unjaded not someone creating more hoops and barriers at the offset. It's him and guys who should make more effort
He puts the onus on women to impress him, while he sits back. I like traditional roles of men pursuing and trying to impress the lady, not submit an audition for his approval..
I ended up blocking him (I got notified he looked at my profile so I looked at his and then blocked without either of us talking)

Reason 999 why OLD is not for me! 🙄

OP posts:
donquixotedelamancha · 15/01/2024 13:14

Why do you think men would want low-effort women more than women do?

Boobs.

ILostMy20s · 15/01/2024 13:46

Aikko · 15/01/2024 11:41

"I sometimes wonder when you see people who complain about being "ghosted" on dating apps whether the cause is due to the boring nature of their messages. Certainly I've ghosted people for this before - when you only ever get short responses and they're not contributing anything to the conversation, you either come to the conclusion they're not interested in chatting, or you get exhausted from the effort it's taking to keep it going."

Yes, almost certainly I would suspect most are ghosted for either being too boring, or just not that attractive enough for the other person to feel like bothering putting the effort in.

It's easy for high value women and men to bin people off in OLD. They will have the options - and be communicating with multiple people concurrently.

Speaking personally, but it doesn't matter how attractive someone is if the quality of messages is really bad.

There was someone I matched with a few months ago, who I definitely found attractive from the photos. But my word were they dull! Honestly, pulling teeth would've been less painful than keeping that conversation going.

After about the fifth or sixth message in a row where I only got a brief response and they hadn't asked me anything in return to help the conversation on, I thought "sod it, I'm wasting my time" and just couldn't be bothered to reply any further. 😆Then a few days later I noticed that they'd unmatched/blocked me for not replying!

Some people are much better in person than via message. But it's a shame that a lot of attractive people also tend to be very boring on dating apps, and have the conversational abilities of a tea spoon (being generous).

BillionaireTea · 15/01/2024 13:54

There’s a type of man who tells you you’re funny or impressive or clever, in a weirdly superior way as if everyone knows you’d be desperate for his approval

God yes. So many times the first message is "Your profile made me laugh." Never a moment to burnish up their reply to give me the reciprocal gift of laughter...

SamW98 · 15/01/2024 14:34

ILostMy20s · 15/01/2024 11:07

I don't really have a problem with that request - it allows you to show a bit of personality, or display your interest in something as a conversation starter. My go-to unusual fact is that the collective noun for goldfinches is a "charm" - so you can probably tell that I'm interested in birds or nature, for example.

The problem is on dating apps is that a lot of people really don't know how to keep a conversation going. I don't know if this a recent phenomenon as a result of social media or whatever, but there are far too many people (both men and women are guilty of this) who either only talk about themselves and never ask questions, or just always send incredibly dry, dull messages.

I sometimes wonder when you see people who complain about being "ghosted" on dating apps whether the cause is due to the boring nature of their messages. Certainly I've ghosted people for this before - when you only ever get short responses and they're not contributing anything to the conversation, you either come to the conclusion they're not interested in chatting, or you get exhausted from the effort it's taking to keep it going.

I’ll be honest, poor communication is the main reason I unmatched with people on OLD. I hated it when I matched with a good looking man and he turned out to have the communication of a monosyllabic teenager.

Planesmistakenforstars · 15/01/2024 15:41

His approach has worked for you both. It has filtered you out, and you can sit back and be pursued while also posting paragraphs on mumsnet about why a random dating profile of a man you don't want to date and who wouldn't want to date you has irked you so much.

Hont1986 · 15/01/2024 16:52

He puts the onus on women to impress him, while he sits back. I like traditional roles of men pursuing and trying to impress the lady,

So you both want the same thing, then?

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