My bf has forgotten it’s my birthday today

[fairiesrus]

We work together away from home one night a week. We have been together for four years. He hasn’t wished me a happy birthday yet and I’m devastated. I keep dropping hints like ‘My daughter can’t wait until I get home tomorrow as she has bought me a present’ (daughter from previous relationship), nothing! Also, ‘Remind me what you bought your mum for her birthday last week’ 😏 Does this mean he doesn’t really love me? Am I overreacting? Just feel so sad.

I wouldn't tell him. He's only going to rush out to petrol station and come back with an aging bunch of carnations and/a box of chocolates. I think I'd rather have nothing

Gotta love all the posters telling op to “be an adult” and tell him, or how they “wouldn’t be upset” if their partner forgot their birthday. Utter Bullshit! ALL of us would feel at least a twinge of sadness and disappointment if our other halves forgot!
OP- it’s shit and after 4 years together, he either forgot it’s your birthday or doesn’t care/understand how important celebrating it is to you. Either way, its shit and you have every right to be sad!!

No. That's silly.

Say today is my birthday and I'm upset you haven't remembered

Stop hinting! Say directly that it is your birthday.

If you don't want to say 'have you forgotten my birthday' you can say something about having had a treat or something today because it's your birthday. But you need to say the words 'it's my birthday today'

The way you're talking about your DD, it sounds like your birthday is tomorrow, so maybe that's what he thinks too?

Stop being silly and just tell him it's your birthday.

Stop beating around the bush with the hints and just tell him. It's nearly 9pm, if you've had nothing by this point or he hasn't told you about a 'surprise ' then I think he's forgotten. Talk to him, tell him it has upset you, its pretty shitty imo to forget a partners birthday.

I'd tell him tbh.

I'm not great at remembering birthdays because i don't much care about mine and don't place importance on it. But I do recall my DHs, parents and Dcs birthdays- and my closest friend because she places alot of store on it. It's important to them so i remember it. But certainly for my best friend I had to make a point of putting it in my diary because it does not readily come to mind. He might be very occupied with other thoughts- but it won't hurt to say it matters to you and you are disappointed IMO.

Well , the OP does obviously care.
Just tell him. I hope he is VERY apologetic.

Did you never ask?

Oh.
Next thing is … when is his birthday? Do not do anything . No card. Nothing .

I have just ended it with him. I told him he’d forgotten and he said he hadn’t forgotten but he doesn’t rate birthdays. Happy birthday me! 🥳

If you are still together.

I am 40 today so it is a big birthday too.

Well done you @fairiesrus

Go fetch the spare duvet ready for him to sleep on the couch

We are supposed to be going away this weekend to celebrate in a large house with my parents and siblings and their families. He shouldn’t have forgotten.

Has there not been any mention from you in the run u, as to what your plans are for your 40th?

So he won’t have forgotten then? You’ve got a big celebration this weekend?

Good for you! Make 40 a new start for you! My 40s have been my best years so far and I hope yours are too

I am in the car almost leaving the hotel in Llangollen. I live in Edgeware so have a long drive hone alone 😭😭😭

Yeah , but just think of that great load you have left behind.

He does t rate birthdays?

Well that's fine but he knows you so even if no present or card buying he could still wish you all the best and a Happy Birthday.

What a clown.

What an arsehole! Good riddance

I get that not everyone ‘rates birthdays’ but a Happy Birthday or some sort of an acknowledgement is not too much to ask.

Happy 40th Birthday 🥳

Turns out he doesn’t rate birthdays! Last year he bought be an expensive pair of diamond earrings and on my 40th, not even a ‘happy birthday’.

it Clearly wasn’t working.