Fab & Glam Part 4 - Spring into Happiness!

[Paddlechick666]

Good Lord people, we've filled a thread up in about 6 weeks!

Anyways, here's a link to the venue Tanee suggested for a picnic:

www.coramsfields.org/index.php

Looks fabulous so let's get planning!

ps: sorry for London/Southern centric take on this but we'll plan hits around the rest of the country too I promise.

pps: Lily, get yer butt on FB woman!

Well thats good HW because he now has the upper hand. i don't know the in's and out's of his job but, is there a chance he could ask for OW to be transferred? if not then I think he has to be brutal and insist she is asked to leave if they really do want him to stay. This has gone on long enough now. If they want H to be able to give his best to his job then they have to be willing to remove any damaging diversions!! This is where I now tell you to get your bossy head on and stick your nose in!

I am brooding on it now and have compiled an email to his boss - a very friendly one. I also have a good mind to phone her to say that i know what she is up to and that if she wants to have it all in the open then we can.

TFM are you sure you are not just spoiling for a fight today - are you bored? .

Stop talking without me!!!!

I am actually working!!!

Just needed to pop in really quickly to say hello. I will catch up properly later.

TFM - contcat the 'friend'. Definitely. Sounds to me like your dp did whatever it took to get rid of anyone and everyone you were close to. I wouldn't be surprised if that's exactly why he took her out. And I wouldn't be surprised if his irrational anger against her is because she knocked him back!

You do need as many people on your side as possible. On here and especially in RL. This is a friend who not only wants to get back in touch, but also knows some of what your dp is like already. She really could be an invaluable support at some point or another.

Lets face it, you have nothing to lose by contacting her do you? It's another step in the right direction.

I'll be back properly later

p.s. PMSL at you taking every plant and bulb TFM!
You go girl!!!!

TFM i would definately catch up with your old friend again. It always helps to have a rl friend and she may be able to help with more practical stuff in the future when you are on your own. Even if it's a good chinwag over a bottle of wine, although i know you don't really talk much
ooh HW are you going to ring her ? Trying to catch up with your story as best i can. But surely if they want him to stay then he has to go ?

meant SHE has to go!

Fight! Fight! Fight! Go for it HW!

Yes guys, thats what I thought, it may be worth getting in touch with her for the support and some of the humping should I get a windfall and be able to do a runner! You know Baffy, little things keep falling into place, it's like a jigsaw being put together. I would put money on it that he took her out for that reason! I haved underestimated him over the years, he is a very devious man, thats why i have to kep my cards close to my chest and not tell him anything!

PS baffy, I'm going to take all the toilet roll too and laugh myself silly at the thought of him having to use his Racing Post where I always thought he should be using it!

lillyloo - yes in an ideal world she should go - but remember we are dealing with of men here who do have their heads where the sun dont shine .

H is actually too nice somtimes and did have the chance a long while ago to get rid - at the time he was too scared of the fallout. He does not want to be remembered for being the one to ruin her career. In fact we both want to take the moral high ground on this.

He is really a fantastic person to work for and i am not in the least bit surprised they will not let him go easily - but there really is nothing much they can now offer him to make him stay. We have tried the 'working together like professionals' - but she just couldnt handle that and asked to be moved, now she is regretting that i think as she really does want to work in his department and be a part of that team (as do so many), she is not getting what she wants and is doing what we all know a scorned woman is capable of and try and backstab him as much as possible.

In the words of Harry Hill there is only one solution -FIGHT- but i think we will just back off and watch from a distance. No-one is indespenible afterall and life will go on.

It is as we all know a question of control and power struggles - h now wants out and really i think she wants him to stay and fight.

Anyway will keep you posted as it is getting quite exciting.

TFM you are naughty, you know i am a lady and to get into a fight would really show me for the hairy biker i really am -ooops .

Hi girls!
TFM - I would get in touch with your friend. What harm can it do? If you were close friends before hopefully you can get that back and you do need an ally in RL!
HW - Its great that H's company don't want to lose him, maybe he can do a bit of bargaining to get her out of the way. Does he have another job to go to?
Lilyloo - welcome back! Its been a while. How is the baby?
Baffy - lol at you trying to work while we all chatter on.
Dior - how did the chat go last night? OK I hope.
Hope everyone has a good Easter. Mine will be a bit crap now but I'm going to try and make the best of a bad job!!

Right listen... if anything good happens can someone please text me?!!!

I am switching this off as I really have to work and I want to get home before midnight.

But I hate to miss out!!

I've done it! I don't have her number anymore but I've left mine with a message at her work. God I'm getting brave! The wife of the family friend just rang me too so thats the second RL person I've told. I'm shaking like a leaf. It's all really real isn't it. No more pretending.

HW Just have a fight! Lets get it over with. We can be ladies again after it's finished. Blimey, I hope for P's sake I manage to avoid him tonight, the way I'm feeling he might just end up in the freezer! Minced!

Dont, you are gouding me on too much now!!!

I may phone her tonight to say that if it is a fight she wants then i am happy to go over all the old ground again - but i am sure she will not want that - but then she can have the whole of the long weekend to brood over it all - or she can go and bitch to the bosses who will be wanting to enjoy the long weekend.

Yes he has got something to go to if it comes to that - it will be less money to start with but i do think it is a small price to pay - (pardon the pun). Also dont think he will be in the job centre long anyway - even though i am biased he really is very very good at what he does. And we wont be on the bread line - i will just have to go back to full time myself .

Well done TFM it is a hard first step but i bet you feel so much better for making it real - good for you. Now no regrets from now on take control of your wonderful life.

OK, its all happening, the woman I left the message with has phoned my friend and she has just text me we are going to try and meet for a 'catchup', it's going to be a long session

I'm excited and nervous all at once. He has just come home and is now asleep on the settee. Far too early for me to go to my room and leave dd. I feel sick to my stomach, he is snoring like a pig and I am very close to the Sky remote! It my end up up his nose! I cannot stand the sight of him. I just so hope that he fact he has sat in the room does not mean he is going to start his charm offence. He is only going to be very disapointed when I don't fall for it. I had better prepare myself. Do you know, I really feel as though I should be frightened, I usually am, but this time I'm not. I just feel nothing but contempt for him. And I think I feel angry. I hope i can keep this up.

HW, whatever you decide to do you must let us know straight away, it is all very exciting! I have a feeling she is certainly going to regret trying to stir things up. xx

I think she already knows she has met her match - but that is not why i am doing this. I feel very tired of it all and just want to get on with my life again. In some ways this is going to give us closeure once and for all but then i dont want to be the one to 'start' the ball rolling as such. By h walking away from it all i dont really need to show how much i still think about it (because although i do most of the time i try and get on with my life). It has felt like we have been waiting for this to happen for a while though and it feels quite odd ifswim.

I actually think it has taken h this long to get into his right state of mind - it is lovely to have the old him (improved version) back. Take note baffy if your h does take this route before it is too late for you.

By the way baffy did you go out with h last night afterall? If he truely is sorry and wants yet another chance then he will still be doing the begging in a few weeks time so dont push yourself into having to make a decision before you are ready and remember you take full control from now on.

wow i think the meet up has done us all so much good - just look at the progress we have all made this week.

I for one certainly feel a lot stronger and it sounds as if GU and TFM do too, I dont care how we got it but i am so glad we are all taking control of our lives now - and that can only be a good thing.

One thing i do hope is that whatever the final outcome we will remain friends for a long time - i can almost see us comparing support stockings in the future . I am going to look for a book - This is not the life I ordered - and if i can find it would like to send it to you TFM. It is about a group of woman who have supported each other through some pretty rotten times and lived to not only tell their tales but go on to have some more good and bad times together.

Have a great evening everyone and easter if i dont get another chance to post - will be trying to sort out the piles of washing to take to peoples that we go to over the weekend!!

TFM well done for telling people, i bet it seems surreal with him being there but having no idea what you are going to do. Am so glad you feel strong enough to do it, keep it up and keep us posted!
HW yes it def not an ideal world is it! Agree sometimes it's about getting back some semblance of normality, exactly how i felt when dp left his job. Hope things work out either way. Hope you don't suffocate under the washing this weekend!
Thanks Ginnedup she fine thanks, how you ?

Hope you all have lovely easter girls and who knows we might be able to compile our own book soon and use the proceeds for a real fab and glam tour (think that's why we called the thread that in the first place? Seems ages ago now!)

HW that is so lovely of you and I would love it if you would send it to me. I don't know about everyone else HW but I feel we really will be freinds for life, I really do. I have never ever been able to be as open and honest about things with anyone before, you ladies are really something else, really special and I cannot imagine my life without you in it. I cannot describe to you the state I have been in recently and you you have all got me through it. I cannot thank you enough for caring about me enough to do that.

I can't really describe how it feels lily, Its like nothing I have ever felt before. I am feeling quite strong and informed on the inside but still very nervous of him, I feel as though I have to still act gullable, IYSWIM, so that he doesn't pik up on the fact i am feeling stronger and step things up a cog. I also don't want him to cotton on to my plan, even though it's not going to happen overnight it is the thought of saving up and getting away without him knowing that is keeping me going. I feel in control for the first time ever. In control of my own life. Now that does feel good

Lots of love to everyone xxx

Hi all.

Tfm im fine just got a chest infection that has knocked me for 6! Will email soon.

I hope i didnt infect anyone sunday?

Well you didn't infect me

Sorry you aren't well Sugar, I hope you feel better soon. Hope you are being well taken care of xxx

Wow TFM! Great about your friend. She must be keen to make up to have texted back so quickly. I think you'll be able to pull it off with H this time. You have to put that brick wall up around you so he can't penetrate it with his false charm, because you'll know it is false this time.
HW - I feel the same as you that we will be friends for a long time. I think Sunday was the start of something, for me anyway. It's showed me that you are all real genuine people and not just imaginary people on a screen. Its a good feeling to have real friends who are there for you and understand you. I have plenty of RL friends, but sometimes I can't confide in them because they are not in the same situation and just wouldn't understand. I'm going to keep a look out for that book too - it sounds interesting.
I do go on don't I

Get well soon Sugar! You didn't infect me either (glad I didn't kiss you goodbye now )

Morning Everybody

P has gone into work today so I can breathe! I overheard him asking dd if she wanted to go with him (into the office) she said no. When he asked why she said she wanted to stay with mummy. Then in a very low voice he asked her a couple of times why she didn't want to go with daddy. I think if he had planned a nice day out for dd she might have gone, I'm not sure the thought of going to his office really did it for her. I do hope he learns from all this. I hope he takes a minute to look at himself rather than blame me.

He seems a bit calmer today, not as angry. His face is different, the way he is walking about and, his voice is softer. He seems more relaxed. I think he may be on the turn. I think. I could be wrong though. I am not changing my mind about leaving. I am not going back to square one this time. If he is on the turn and because I am not going to just forgive and forget I really don't know whats around the corner. This next bit is all new. I'm not sure how he will react.

Just came on to say hello and offload really, it makes me feel better to get it off my chest, hope you don't mind me rambling. Don't feel obliged to reply

I hope everyone else has a lovely day. xxx

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