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Original poster

Partner’s porn choices disgust me

134 replies

MayaTea · 30/12/2023 19:14

Its crazy because I never thought this would be an issue for me but I was wrong. I knew that my DP watched porn and I generally don’t have an issue with it (I’ll even watch some myself at times). He’s never made a secret of it either, but it’s nothing we really discussed much because I don’t share his interests there.
The problem is I saw some seriously disgusting stuff on his phone and kept scrolling and I can’t unsee it now. There was one video with over 1000 comments and lots of people there even asked how the fuck this was legal and on a porn site because that’s how wrong it looked. It’s all legal and legit but seriously creepy and I’m more than disgusted for a variety of reasons. He doesn’t get it at all.
I don’t think I can just put this aside and I’m so upset.

OP posts:
bonzaitree · 30/12/2023 20:23

Trust your gut OP.

JaneyGee · 30/12/2023 20:27

Creepy. Obviously has an attraction to underage girls. I certainly wouldn’t leave him alone with my 12-year-old daughter, put it that way.

SusanKennedyshouldLTB · 30/12/2023 20:27

What do you want from this thread, op?

have a read of the one about why women accept such low standards in men. Ask yourself why you are thinking of overlooking something that disgusts you because he is ‘generally a good partner.’

369damnshesfine · 30/12/2023 20:32

I have no issues with normal porn but there is a lot of porn I do have a problem with.

My DP being attracted to underage girls would be a deal breaker for me, whether he watched porn or not.

Pumpkinprince55 · 30/12/2023 20:36

I think I would be disgusted, too. Even if he sees porn as nothing but his personal entertainment he should still recognise that this sort of stuff is morally wrong.

Mirabai · 30/12/2023 20:42

Total dealbreaker for me.

harerunner · 30/12/2023 21:30

TheSunIsOutAndTheSkyIsBlue · 30/12/2023 20:04

I wish people would realise that porn has it dirty little roots in child abuse. All of it. So whoever watches it, paying or not, has a part in that.

Stop being so "cool" and realise you are part of the problem that has warped and will warp generations if you watch porn.

Whether you think this poor person in the video is 12 or 22 - it is all the same. Abuse. And raise you bar, fgs

Irrespective of whether porn is immoral, this is ridiculous.

harerunner · 30/12/2023 21:34

Ridiculous in the sense that watching vanilla porn between consenting 20 somethings relate to child abuse?

LaughingCat · 30/12/2023 21:36

MayaTea · 30/12/2023 19:54

The disgusting thing was some Japanese stuff with an extremely young looking actress in it. I googled her and she is in her 20s but it really looked like this was a very young looking girl. I clearly wasn’t the only one who thought that given the shocked comments.
I’m usually fine with the stuff that he watches and some of it is niche but this was just gross.

The live action hentai is always a bit weird…I wouldn’t put too much stock in it though. I love animated hentai (not the tentacles, they make me feel a bit nauseous!). Some of that stuff is SERIOUSLY messed up but just because I’ve watched it, doesn’t mean I a) condone any of it in real life, b) want to do any of it in real life or c) even liked it.

It is just a film but find out what about it that he enjoyed, if he did. Maybe put your mind at ease?

I seriously worried it was death porn you’d found and was going to fervently nod and tell you to gtfo of there!

Cuttysark4321 · 30/12/2023 21:37

Doesnt matter how old the actress is -The video was created to suit a niche - that being the violation of young children. I would run a mile.

MrsQTip · 30/12/2023 21:39

Uuuugh I could not get over this he has no respect, he gives me the creeps just reading it 🤢🤢🤢

Worries123 · 30/12/2023 21:42

Some of the stuff on porn sites is truly disgusting. The actresses/actors are of legal age, but they deliverately chose people that look extremely young/underage.

LaughingCat · 30/12/2023 21:44

TheSunIsOutAndTheSkyIsBlue · 30/12/2023 20:04

I wish people would realise that porn has it dirty little roots in child abuse. All of it. So whoever watches it, paying or not, has a part in that.

Stop being so "cool" and realise you are part of the problem that has warped and will warp generations if you watch porn.

Whether you think this poor person in the video is 12 or 22 - it is all the same. Abuse. And raise you bar, fgs

Happy Big Brother GIF by MOODMAN

I’m sorry, but this has got to win the prize for most left-field comment of the day. Porn is porn, a multi-billion dollar, mostly legal, industry that serves a need. There is a VERY dark underbelly to it, run mostly by criminal gangs, but the vast majority is vacuous tat catering to different tastes and demographics. If you don’t like watching it yourself, fine…but making out it will be the death knell for society, and that all porn is somehow child abuse. It’s a stretch.

Justleaveitblankthen · 30/12/2023 21:47

@Laughingcat
Can you come back and explain why you believe this?

LaughingCat · 30/12/2023 21:47

LaughingCat · 30/12/2023 21:36

The live action hentai is always a bit weird…I wouldn’t put too much stock in it though. I love animated hentai (not the tentacles, they make me feel a bit nauseous!). Some of that stuff is SERIOUSLY messed up but just because I’ve watched it, doesn’t mean I a) condone any of it in real life, b) want to do any of it in real life or c) even liked it.

It is just a film but find out what about it that he enjoyed, if he did. Maybe put your mind at ease?

I seriously worried it was death porn you’d found and was going to fervently nod and tell you to gtfo of there!

Show quote history

Sorry, also meant to ask…was his whole viewlist similar to that Japanese one? In which case, yeah, I’d be icked out too.

LaughingCat · 30/12/2023 21:49

Justleaveitblankthen · 30/12/2023 21:47

@Laughingcat
Can you come back and explain why you believe this?

I’m sorry @Justleaveitblankthen - I’m not sure which bit you’re referring to. Happy to respond, just not sure what belief you’re asking me to explain.

Opentooffers · 30/12/2023 21:50

I once saw a strap line saying 'teen gets DP'd' on an ex's phone (glad he was an ex already by then, though friends at the time). Chilling and grim, particularly as he had previously been involved in fostering vulnerable teenage girls - just wrong on so many levels that a person would then seek porn watching girls, or even women, who look the age he had fostered.
It's another grim world and waves huge red flags. Not friends anymore thankfully, made me wonder too much.

Original poster
MayaTea · 30/12/2023 21:55

Thank you for some feedback. I really don’t think I’m a prude but this felt wrong.
I didn’t check his whole fav list but it’s not the usual stuff he likes and goes for. Yeah I’ll talk to him but really didnt want to see him today

OP posts:
LordSnot · 30/12/2023 21:58

Stop worrying about looking like a prude and raise your standards.

Disturbia81 · 30/12/2023 22:01

Fucking grim isn't it. The fact that porn is available.. Japanese men are obsessed with teens.. There's even sex dolls over there for paedos.
Stop the world!

Floogal · 30/12/2023 22:04

Is it hentai? Seen some of it (red tube), some funny (escape from the pervy kingdom) much of it so out there. Never anything illegal

NightAndShiningArmour · 30/12/2023 22:06

Was she reading news? Were there aquatics involved? My OH and his friends used to compare weeeeeird shit they came across (ha) on the internet while browsing regular stuff.

Goateen · 30/12/2023 22:15

TheSunIsOutAndTheSkyIsBlue · 30/12/2023 20:04

I wish people would realise that porn has it dirty little roots in child abuse. All of it. So whoever watches it, paying or not, has a part in that.

Stop being so "cool" and realise you are part of the problem that has warped and will warp generations if you watch porn.

Whether you think this poor person in the video is 12 or 22 - it is all the same. Abuse. And raise you bar, fgs

How is all porn rooted in children, can you please elaborate?