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Original poster

Typed partners name into google- freaking shocked

91 replies

Umwelt · 02/11/2023 20:32

we have been together two years. we are very close and open (so i thought). i was updating my ICE details at work and typed her name in google as i know my lot might too.
it turned out she was in big brother (foreign country version) and had sex on tv.
she fcuked a bloke she just met on live tv and almost marry him. this was 20 years ago.
i am lost.
as far as i knew, she was with someone else at the time show was recorded.
so i do not care about her decisions at the time but why the fcuk not share something this significant. i dont care about the past, we all have it but if it is on the net then maybe.

OP posts:
Doggymummar · 02/11/2023 20:33

Course she did

Dotcheck · 02/11/2023 20:34

Perhaps she didn’t mention it because she isn’t proud of it?

People change over 20 years

Apossum · 02/11/2023 20:37

‘I don’t care about the past’ proceeds to care very deeply about the past.
good lord it was 20 years ago. Let it go.

tillytoodles1 · 02/11/2023 20:39

Lots of people have the same name, are you sure it's her?

Original poster
Umwelt · 02/11/2023 20:41

i am just shocked. yes, it was long time ago, dont have a problem with the event as such but at the same time it seems she cheated on her partner at the time and put her family through hell. TV station almost lost the broadcasting licence because of her.
by "i dont care about past" i think i meant stuff that noone can find out- stuff that comes up on first page of google search is maytbe diferent?

OP posts:
Original poster
Umwelt · 02/11/2023 20:42

i am sure it is her, freaking photos and videos on the net i saw

OP posts:
ThereIbledit · 02/11/2023 20:43

It was 20 years ago.

Haven't you ever made a stupid decision that you regret, 20 years ago?

Original poster
Umwelt · 02/11/2023 20:44

Apossum · 02/11/2023 20:37

‘I don’t care about the past’ proceeds to care very deeply about the past.
good lord it was 20 years ago. Let it go.

woulnt care much if she told me. finding out by accident shocked me to the core.

OP posts:
Nousernamesleftatall · 02/11/2023 20:45

Ok. So?

Myfabby · 02/11/2023 20:46

leave her.

Azandme · 02/11/2023 20:49

People change.

You can either judge her as the person YOU know - the person she is now, or the person she was twenty years ago, who you didn't know, and who she clearly isn't any more (if she was you wouldn't be so shocked).

Epidote · 02/11/2023 20:50

It would bother me more she had a partner at the time of the show that what she did on the show itself. For you, it seems that you are more bothered about people finding out and seeing the photos that anything else. No advice about that.

Original poster
Umwelt · 02/11/2023 20:50

Nousernamesleftatall · 02/11/2023 20:45

Ok. So?

just shocked she hadn't tell me.
id rather hear that from her than find out on my own.

OP posts:
Jellykat · 02/11/2023 20:50

Ask her why she didnt mention it? as pp says, she could just be really embarrassed.. we've all done things in our youth we're not proud of.

Allwelcone · 02/11/2023 20:51

Ummm...yes i'd be a bit wtf. Why dont you just ask her?

Original poster
Umwelt · 02/11/2023 20:52

Myfabby · 02/11/2023 20:46

leave her.

i am upset but this was 20 years ago. she is a loving, caring partner, so we'll have a chat about it, i just wished i didnt find out like that

OP posts:
Original poster
Umwelt · 02/11/2023 20:54

Azandme · 02/11/2023 20:49

People change.

You can either judge her as the person YOU know - the person she is now, or the person she was twenty years ago, who you didn't know, and who she clearly isn't any more (if she was you wouldn't be so shocked).

yeah, i had some bits and pieces info from her past and i told her we definitely wouldn't get on rofl

OP posts:
noooooooo · 02/11/2023 20:55

Come on mate. I’ve lived about four lifetimes in the last twenty years. Literally not an atom of me is the same person. I doubt I’d know her if I passed her. So - a positive spin- she may not have told you because she knew this is what she’d get, and wants it to work. That might also be a negative spin. I don’t know that her past is your business, either. She shagged a guy on telly, she didn’t bomb a nursery.

Ibizabar · 02/11/2023 20:57

It's fuck.

spitefulandbadgrammar · 02/11/2023 20:58

Maybe she isn’t dwelling on something that happened 20 years ago and has literally no bearing on your relationship or her life now? Is she supposed to give you a blow by blow account full life history of everything she’s ever done so you can assess whether you approve of her past behaviour?

HomeBird43 · 02/11/2023 20:58

Lol at all the cool kids pretending this wouldn’t bother them at all.

Original poster
Umwelt · 02/11/2023 20:59

Jellykat · 02/11/2023 20:50

Ask her why she didnt mention it? as pp says, she could just be really embarrassed.. we've all done things in our youth we're not proud of.

absolutely, thou there is no record of me doing it on the internet, or so i hope..
if i ask her, she'll tell me everything. tho ive been giving her hints last couple of days and she seems to be steering away from it. i dont care she fcuked and almost marry some bloke on tv. ok, fine, i do care more than i thought...

OP posts:
Original poster
Umwelt · 02/11/2023 21:01

noooooooo · 02/11/2023 20:55

Come on mate. I’ve lived about four lifetimes in the last twenty years. Literally not an atom of me is the same person. I doubt I’d know her if I passed her. So - a positive spin- she may not have told you because she knew this is what she’d get, and wants it to work. That might also be a negative spin. I don’t know that her past is your business, either. She shagged a guy on telly, she didn’t bomb a nursery.

rofl, thanks for perspective.
i could not force myself to watch the video but yeah, past long gone.
but it has affected her in many ways. things begin to make sense.

OP posts:
FairFuming · 02/11/2023 21:02

You need to have a good think if this will effect how you see her permanently. If it will just end it now. Tbh I don't think its a huge deal. She obviously ashamed of it which in its self shows she's changed.

Original poster
Umwelt · 02/11/2023 21:03

spitefulandbadgrammar · 02/11/2023 20:58

Maybe she isn’t dwelling on something that happened 20 years ago and has literally no bearing on your relationship or her life now? Is she supposed to give you a blow by blow account full life history of everything she’s ever done so you can assess whether you approve of her past behaviour?

being open and honest about the past was her idea- i was happy to not talk about it and enjoy life and future together

OP posts:
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