Dating sites for the over 50’s

[WanderingNortherner]

Are there any good dating sites for the over 50’s?

Any success stories?

I have given up with Tinder, Bumble and Hinge!!!

I’m 54 and ideally looking for someone within 5 years of my own age either side.
Yet , in my OLD experience so far, most of the men in that age bracket fall into 3 categories

1 - want a woman at least 10-15 years their junior.

2 - Want a replacement wife to cook, clean and wipe their arse.

3- want a no strings shag.

There are a handful that fall outside those categories but they are very few and far between.

I get lots of likes and messages but as soon as I make it clear that I’m not interested in talking dirty with a stranger then it’s over before it begins.

I’m well turned out, pretty articulate, witty and honest and yet I seem to attract sexually frustrated men who think ‘cracking tits’ is an acceptable way to speak to a woman they’ve never met.

@SamW98 er yes- see my post below- that's many of my friends experience too and hence I suspect why those who are peed off off but don't much fancy being on their own either remain in often unsatisfactory relationships

Ahhh, glad it’s working out for you 🙂

This was for you @witham 🙂

I.met someone on Ourtime 4 years ago. Never experienced any of the negative behaviour mentioned. Must have been lucky. Don't remember it being thst expensive. Not looking to going back in the future. Sounds grim

Classic FM is on a "compendium" website which includes Telegraph and Times. I've met some chaps on it, and also on Match. I'd say the Classic FM one is pretty reputable, and one of its big advantages is that it shows the age range the other person is looking for, so you can see if men only want younger women. I've met some men who have had dates on Bumble so I joined it and have had several chats. There is also Elite Singles which has fewer but decent matches. Eharmony had hardly anyone on it. That's my comprehensive list as I decided to have a big push on finding someone (I'm 61) and loads of conversations and dome meetings but no "success".

Tbh, one of my male friends (late 50s) found similar and it wasn't a positive for him.

He was looking for a relationship having been single for a few years. A lot of the women in their 50s had escaped a mediocre long term marriages, sexless marriages or abusive marriages. Their children had flown the nest, they had financial freedom and there was no way they were going to become encumbered with another relationship. Or they were just finding themselves again and looking for fun (sex).

There were obviously women looking for relationships too but don't under estimate the number of women in their 50s who are just looking for some fun (sex).

He did eventually meet someone he's been with for nearly a year now but the early days were eye opening for both of us, I think!

Which websites did he find women in their 50's looking just for sex? Asking for a friend

Currently in 50-something online dating hell & couldn't say any site is better than another.

Bumble: the "sex positivity" symbol is useful for weeding out these types.

Hinge: met my last boyfriend on there - lasted nearly 6 months

Match - haven't had much luck.

Lots of similarities: illiterate men, Snapchat-type filters (ears etc), half naked selfies, lots of tattoos (if you are in to that kind of thing).

Very few replies if you message. Ghosting. Entitled men who have had a good beating with the ugly stick. Peter Pans.

I'll give it another few months then stop.

Might try speed dating.

But yes, it's pretty grim.

He was on Match!

After getting bored with sleazes and time wasters I had 4/5 months off the apps then went back on this week to see if they’ve improved - it’s a resounding no.

Matched with a decent looking bloke but he literally couldn’t answer a question or engage in anything like a conversation.

Every single thing I asked him to try and get a conversation, he replied ‘your sexy’ (sic) ‘wow your amazing’ etc etc etc

The point where I gave up was when on about by 5th attempt to get anything out of him about himself he replied to my questions with ‘I want to hold your hand and give you cheeky kisses’

FFS mate you’re 54 not 16

I have a friend in her early 50's that wants to be in a relationship having been single for - let's just say a decade - mainly/partly due to an incredible demanding job (which she has now left) - she's a person with a very definite and distinct personality - when she says she travels it's not an understatement and she's an active reader and independent film watcher - she's a culture vulture - I've suggested speed dating @WanderingNortherner ?

I used our time at age of 60 after a long marriage, had about 30 coffee dates before meeting my partner. I’m 60 he’s 62. 18 months on it’s just a lovely relationship .

bummer! half my message evaporated for some unknown reason! Ugh can I be bothered to type it again...

@RoséProsecco
would you consider trying speed dating if the apps aren't working? I find that they run some speed dating nights in the city very close to where my friend lives that are specifically aimed at the over 50's - I'd love her to find someone - my impression is that it's not the popular thing it was years ago mainly I guess because the apps are so well known and there are so many to choose from and it's easy, as non-commital as you can get.

She just won't put herself out there and accept it's a number game - she seems to be hoping she'll find someone on a train or plane on one of her many trips abroad - which is a nice idea but it just hasn't worked so far. She thinks that she's too much herself and that'll be off-putting for most guys. Has anyone got a view on speed dating now? Anyone tried it lately ? The same types of criticisms come up all the time about the apps - what's the negative with speed dating now?

@larkstar - yes, I think I'd prefer to meet people face to face rather than online.

I only have 1 single friend & she's not keen - would prefer to go with someone.

I've tried OLD and it's absolutely not for me, I know a couple of people who met and married after OLDing so it must work for some people. I know that I want someone very very low key who's into gardening, dogs, their adult kids and who appreciates a good cardigan. And I couldn't care less about height or double chins, I'd probably not notice. I want to know how kind and reliable they are. I can't find out that information over a coffee.

It has to be IRL for me, mooching in the garden centre or library. Or nothing.

As a word of caution...I assumed meeting someone IRL was superior to OLD. met my ex through friends at a party. What I didn't know was my friend had advised his wife to leave my ex because he had numerous affairs in the marriage, behaved like Peter Pan and was in her words a narcissist. She felt she couldn't warn me because I was unlikely to believe her and had warned him off (although I only learned that later). Very soon after we split he started another relationship with someone IRL who I suspect doesn't know about the affairs (including with a woman that he stills fly's to the US to see) and that he has massive commitment issues. He actually isn't physically great looking but is very bougie with heaps of charm so hanging out in his local wine bar works far better for him... I read his profile on an OLD site and actually it gives more a flavour of him than you would get from actually meeting him.

My ex bf is on Bumble and Match. We met on Match and 2 years on, we are now separated, he was arrested by the police for stalking, harassment, Cohesive control and rape. He knew that I would be on Bumble so has gone on there and I have since had messages from him about all the women that are queuing up for him. His ego was big enough already. Online dating has left a bad taste and I'm now looking to restart my journey but no idea which site as doesn't 'ourtime' link through to Match?

His profile on each is very plausible however underneath lurked a guy that took over and yes I was blind sided as I was newly out of a divorce. I'm 51 by the way.

My brother joined a dating site about ten years ago, & met a gipsy woman, who he still sees regularly, after a few months he unsubscribed from the site, but every week he is having to Unsubscribe from new OLD sites from all around the world, it seems like once you are on the books, you are DOOMED .

Admittedly I've never tried speed dating, it still exists I think but the idea makes me shudder. To me, speed dating makes OLD look like a Victorian romance.

toyboywarehouse lol

I kid you not, I've just read a profile that' stated "I'm not perfect but I'm not imperfect either, I sometimes piss in the wardrobe"
What
The
Fuck

Hi all, first post on just joining Mumsnet.

Strange thing is I only found it after googling 'over 50s dating'.
Just reading these posts have been informative and brought me up to date with how things work now (it's been 36 years). Some of what I have read as been shocking, do grown men actual still carry on as teenagers!
Anyway, just wanted to say thanks to the contributors and sorry if it comes across as a bit weird, but I do appreciate what has written.

Also appears to be loads of quality information on this site, so every day's a learning day.
Regards.

A friend of mine met a retired doctor on BlackMatureWomen, and seeing their happiness has given me hope. As for me, I’m still figuring things out. I’ve tried a few dating sites for people over 50 like silver and ourtime, and while I haven’t found ‘the one’ yet, I’ve had some great conversations. At this stage, I think it’s less about rushing into something and more about enjoying the process of meeting people who truly get you.