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Relationships

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Longest you’ve been single?

104 replies

BananaSlug · 20/08/2023 20:23

There’s lots of talk about women staying single and not wanting to date and not needing a man but I don’t know anyone irl who feels this way and all the women I know are dating so out of interest what is the longest you have been single? (as an adult obviously) Completely single no friends with benefits/ sex, nothing. Or if you are single how long have you been single? Just wondering out of interest.

OP posts:
NewNextOfKin · 20/08/2023 22:53

I did 5 years at one point.
Better than being with a shithead.

Might stay single forever now.

JustGotToKeepOnKeepingOn · 20/08/2023 22:53

11 years and counting. I've never had much male attention...

catin8oots · 20/08/2023 22:56

I'm 7 years single. 43. My body is so deformed and fucked by pregnancy I know I will be alone forever.

Phos · 20/08/2023 23:05

Not all that long tbh, I started seeing my now-husband a few months after splitting with ex-husband. I had completely planned on being single for a few years. Didn't quite happen that way.

cushioncovers · 20/08/2023 23:07

13 years.

BananaSlug · 20/08/2023 23:21

Thanks all. Interesting to hear from others. I purposely aimed this at those that didn’t have FWB etc which I know is not really a relationship but I just meant truly alone, no men at all. It’s been 6 years for me and I don’t know anyone irl in the same situation most longest is 1/2 years. I have one friend who can’t be single she is in a new relationship pretty much straight away each time.

OP posts:
tiagra · 20/08/2023 23:30

34 years
Dated a bit in my late teens, early 20s but nothing long term.

Mercy1968 · 20/08/2023 23:39

26 years since I kicked alcoholic ex and kids father out.
I don't fancy giving up my new life for anyone.

Marineboy67 · 20/08/2023 23:43

Was single for 3 years after marriage went shite! Did go on a few first dates but wasn't really interested just lonesome I guess.

WoahLivingOnABear · 20/08/2023 23:54

3 years and counting. I'm 40 and honestly I've never been happier. I'm content, have a really good group of friends, more financially stable than I've ever been, have been on several holidays, with several more planned, my career is in a good place.

I'm not planning on getting into another relationship anytime soon, I'm just concentrating on myself and my children.

I second that the vast majority of my friends that are in relationships are not happy, and the more I hear about their men, the less I think I ever want another relationship.

Johnisafckface · 21/08/2023 05:33

I have one friend who can’t be single she is in a new relationship pretty much straight away each time.

My ex is like that. He’s mid 50s and has never been single longer than a few months. He will even date/move in people he barely likes just for companionship ( I know all of this as we still talk occasionally)

NewNextOfKin · 21/08/2023 06:29

It always makes my life worse when I'm in a relationship. I haven't been great at picking them, but there aren't many good ones. I did have an 8-year stint single, but I recall one incident of casual sex in that time, so it wouldn't meet your criteria, OP.

If I thought it would improve my life I'd get involved.

35and3 · 21/08/2023 06:32

18m in my very early 20s

Coppertips · 21/08/2023 06:33

Five years and counting in my 50s but I was single for almost six years in my 30s.

Really happy with my life, great career and all that brings, loads of friends and a couple of sociable hobbies. No desire to be in a relationship at all.

MariaVT65 · 21/08/2023 06:35

I was completely single for 3 years in my 20s after a string of bad dating and it was the best time ever. Really wasn’t interested in dating. Instead I moved down the country to improve my career as I had no strings attached, did whatever I wanted, went on lots of amazing holidays with friends etc.

I’m now in my 30s, married, huge mortgage, a 2 year old and another one on the way. I don’t have much freedom, i’m exhausted, and my money goes on childcare. I’m grateful for my health and my family and I love them, but i’m nowhere near as happy as I was when I was single.

OneTitWonder · 21/08/2023 06:36

I was completely single for 7 years before I met my DH - age 28-35.

I actually see it as a very positive time in my life, as I got to know myself really well, set myself up financially, and enjoy my own company.

I absolutely adore my DH and am still very happy after 16 years of marriage, but I know that it if all went arse up I'd be absolutely fine on my own.

GarlicGrace · 21/08/2023 06:38

22 years, and I intend to stay this way!

There was some - very sparse - sex activity in the first 10 years, nothing since. I am not looking.

ManAboutTown · 21/08/2023 08:10

Never long when I was younger - three longish relationships and then a 20 year plus marriage.

Been single for a few years now though and don't miss dealing with someone else's crap.

Will I have another relationship - for sure with the right person but if that person doesn't come along I'm not that bothered to be honest

IHeartGeneHunt · 21/08/2023 08:13

Six years, since my daughter's father left. I have no interest in another relationship at all. I like my life the way it is and I'm not going to share it with anyone.
Nobody believes me though, they all think I'm putting a brave face on! "Oh you never know what's round the corner," etc etc.
Yes I do- it's me and my daughter and my nice peaceful life, and it's really very lovely.

cherryfloss · 21/08/2023 08:18

I have pretty much had a boyfriend since I was 14 years old. When I was 17 - 18 I was single i.e. no official boyfriend for about a year but I was still fielding offers and dating. Then at the end of that year I met the boy who is now husband and we are still together 25 years later.

MrsDanversGlidesAgain · 21/08/2023 08:21

32 years since divorcing ex. Absolutely no intention of being in a relationship ever again, I'm a disaster at picking men and have no wish for one in my life.

Figment1982 · 21/08/2023 08:23

I had my first relationship at 33. No dates or anything (other than a few drunken kisses in nightclubs) before that.

morag1234 · 21/08/2023 08:52

Around 2 years.

morag1234 · 21/08/2023 08:53

Saying that, I don't think I would bother to look for another partner if I split up from my current one.

jay55 · 21/08/2023 10:13

Over ten years single now. I don't date any more and don't want another relationship.