He just deleted me .. what happened?

[wonderfyl]

Chatting to a guy on line for last ten days.
Suggested we exchange numbers and photos of me. I don't have profile pics up for work reasons. He ignored that suggestion.
A few more days passed.
Last night, I suggested we wrap this thing up as I felt he was looking for a pen pal and I'm not . He said he'd like to meet so I replied with a suggestion of exchanging numbers again. I also said that his own Profile pics may not even be his own I woke up this morning and he has deleted the conversation and me ...
What the hell????

Are you seriously on Tinder looking for a relationship with no pictures? 😵‍💫

No I wouldn’t say so because some people have breaks from it or they’re busy with other stuff.

Just be on your guard for any behaviour that might suggest they’re married, but you might not see this until after you’ve met a couple of times.

I think it's more productive and useful to wonder what was in YOUR head that you needed a friend to spot a potentially fake photo and to have given him time and energy when from the start he was a reluctant time waster.. I guess you were blinded by the handsome photo.. just like how men get swept by the flattery of a 20 year old insta model suddenly taking interest in them before she drops her OF account details or Cash App.

I am on tinder with a view to matching with someone who understands my reasons for not putting photos up straight away but knows that once I am comfortable , I will do that without hesitation.
In my bio,I have said that I do not have photos up for professional reasons but happy to share once we've chatted.

But why would you be on Tinder then? Why don't you use a paid website that lets you talk more about your personality and interest. The only ones using Tinder without a clear photo are affair people. Professionals use more 'serious' websites where you get more than 200 characters to type 'pineapple on pizza' or however many letters Tinder gives you. It sounds like you want to benefit from the shallowness of Tinder but then you want them to give you a chance! The men who will give a no pic a chance on Tinder are men who are cheating, dodgy or desperate or..using fake photos. It's just the wrong platform for your cirucmstances, IMHO.

You are waaaaaaaaaay over thinking this and 10 days of chatting is ridiculous for someone whose texts were off.
the online dating pool is full of people who are fucking about and not who they say they are.
if the engagement is not good, move on very quickly. Don’t waste 10 days of your time!

Tinder is hookups. Even guys that say they want a relationship are looking for hookups.

Tinder with no pictures is scammers and extreme fetish hookups.

probably a scammer. got spooked when you said photo was fake

I would say 50% of Tinder is fake pics. You're being ridiculous to get this worked up about speaking to a seemingly not very pleasant person who is on Tinder with no pictures. I don't know why you expected anything other than this.

@WunWun yes or married people!

It's just way too much effort from the offset when there are more transparent options on Tinder who are upfront about their appearance. Who would go through the trouble of swiping on a mystery profile, waste time talking, then get off to another app or exchange numbers when we're not sure we even fancy them just to see a photo which may not even be to our liking. If it's not a match after pics it's so awkward and then the other person has our username on another app or even worse our personal IG, FB or mobile phone number. Too much drama.

You made it pretty clear that you were suspicious of him and thinking of ending it. He just got there first. Not a big deal.

Lost interest, or just wasn't that interested to begin with.

Online dating is full of false starts and quick fizzles. Move on.

You're misunderstanding Tinder. You're never going to get a match by being cagey about pics.
Imagine the situation was reversed, and it was a man's profile with no pics who approached you. Said he couldn't put pics up because of his job... Let's be honest, your first thought is very unlikely to be "okay, fair enough".

You know your reasonings are honourable, but there's no reason for strangers to know - or believe - they are.

I vote is for a catfish.

you didn’t play into their hands and they moved on.

you said that some of their messages sounded robotic. Try Googling some phrases and see if they pop up.

Me, in former roles! kept my private life very private from service users.

I completely understand why you wouldn't want your profile photos on there. You've had some very very strange responses here, so God knows what you're getting with online dating!

I wonder why you even wanted to talk to him given the way he was responding, e.g. in a robotic way. You are used to dealing with odd people, but you didn't seem to identify him as one.

Would you honestly want to interact with someone on OLD who you have no knowledge of? Is the whole point of OLD not to see if you find someone physically attractive?

Exactly this. We can try to psychoanalysis a man we have never had any interaction with, from the scant information you have given us, but really Tinder is not going to work for you at all.

It's impossible to assess strangers motives. His actions could be for a plethora of reasons, all of them innocent. Or he could be an axe wielding maniac. You'll never know and you won't get your answers here. Move on. Hope you manage to meet someone lovely through another means.

He was a scammer, may have been more than one person responding to you hence the different styles

He was more than likely a scammer with a fake pic.

Anyway, giving your reasons for not putting photos up but saying photos on request once you have chatted a bit is fine, in my view.

Many, many scammers and marrieds on OLD so be wary.

Op, if you have no photos, no one who swiped right would be a good person. No one.

Because think about it. They are telling you they don't care what you look like. So they might be desperate. That's not good. They might never have any attentions of meeting. That's not good. They just want to have sex and can't care less what you look like, that's not good. They are married and want to be discreet and will assume that is your reason too. That's not good.

There is no good honourable reason to swipe right on no photo.

If you're using Tinder with no pictures thinking that some genuine person is reading your profile and understanding your reasons for not having pictures and is genuinely interested in getting to know a faceless stranger as a person with the hopes of a relationship, you are in cloud cuckoo land. Putting it mildly.

Yes.

3 months in to a relationship with a lovely man.

Not a cat’s chance in hell I would have swiped right if he didn’t have any pics. And if I accidentally did and then we messaged and he had the audacity to ask me for more photos and say how would he know my pics are genuine… I’d immediately delete and block!!

Completely understandable but I wouldn't say that Tinder is the best place with that limitation. Maybe a paid site, maybe Hinge as it has more conversation starters where you can show pics and videos of your life, just without you in them.

I would not, no, but I was writing from the point of view of the poster, and not someone looking at her profile. That's her choice, and I can see why she would make that choice, and she will put most people off in the process. They're not mutually exclusive ideas.