Single parents when did you find love

[Faithalways]

Wondering if anyone is happy to share their story of finding love whilst being a single parent
I am not looking currently and I have no plans of internet dating in the future but I would love to hear others stories if willing to share

I met my husband when my son was 13, we've been together 9 years. He has a daughter who was 4 when we met. For the most part we are a very happy blended family. (Met online dating)

Dating as a lone parent is a minefield, then again it can be the same without having kids. I was on my own with an 8yr old & 18mth old when I met my hubby.

Ex left me the day I told him I was pregnant with dc2. I started dating again when they were about 9mths, although it was more about me time & having fun than looking for anything long term. I knew it would possibly be extremely difficult to meet someone willing to get involved with 2 kids my dc age.
I met hubby online, incredibly we'd lived just 3 miles apart for years & had never crossed paths ever.
12yrs later we have another dc & it's our 6th wedding anniversary today🙂

I met my now DH when my DS was 8. I'd been a single parent since pregnancy so 8 years single, though I had some casual relationships, but wasn't looking for anything committed. Met at a sports class. I was careful not to introduce DH to DS too soon and they met after we'd dated for a year (DS never met any of the men in casual relationships). DH didn't have any dc of his own. We got married after being together 5 years. Had 2 more dc. It's all worked out great. We are all very happy.

I do think it was less complicated as it was just one DS I had, there would have been bigger logistical issues if I had several DC and/or DH had DC. E.g. we have a 4 bed house and I like that no one has to share. Also DS's dad has never been involved so less potential conflict, and I've always made all the big decisions in DS's life when he was a child

Never - but I had my own money, so no need.

I left an abusive husband with a newborn 13 years ago, brought up son alone and with help from my own family. I was perfectly happy on my own, wouldn't have trusted Internet dating with having a child. Anyway when I turned 36 i was shopping in our lidls met up again with someone I had known as a teenager who had taken a job there because he moved back into the area. No joke we were married 29 days later. Literally when I saw him at work after all these years I fell in love there and then and we met up later that day. He proposed for the first time in his life 6 days after we met again which shocked his family as he had always said he would never marry.They were over the moon for us and said they had never seen hubby so head over heels in love. He had never even lived with a woman always lived alone and had short relationships. 2 years on we have a beautiful house and a single child and twins so now 4 with oldest. He gets on amazing with my, our oldest infact oldest asked last year if he could call him dad which floored us for a bit as we have never encouraged or dis couraged that part. Hubby treats all the kids exactly the same. I have never felt so loved or content as I do now and wouldn't change a thing. Soon to be 38 I would love one more child but we shall see lol

I would say my story is pretty romantic, I think?

I got pregnant with my DD in 2020 by a man I had only gotten with 4 months prior who turned out to be horribly abusive and narcissistic - I kicked him out and he dragged me through court etc for 50/50 contact.

While all this was going on, I went on a night out to a club in the city centre. I spotted my high school boyfriend who I had dumped pretty brutally for no reason before prom and we had never spoken again afterwards. He was bladdered (as was I) so his friends and I went back to his flat to catch up. He was just as perfect as he was back then. Hadn't even had another girlfriend since. I ended up staying the night and we began to text and call more and more for a few months. He revealed to me that he had actually seen me with the ex when I was pregnant and had felt a pang of sadness. Asked me about DD (she was about 1.5 at this point) and how things were with my situation. I expressed all the stress I felt and how the ex had horrifically hurt me all throughout our relationship. He was so sympathetic and caring and I was terrified of it, and when it came to him asking me on a date I ummed and ahh'd at the thought of entering another relationship and if he would even accept my DD. But I did give it another shot, and I am so grateful.

A year and a half later, we are living together and him and his family love my daughter like his own, takes care of her and he plans to propose within the next few years. He has never changed since we met in high school. He is unbelievably kind, generous and forgiving, and my DD always chats about him to her bio dad. She loves him so much. I don't know if I would be where I am today without him.

I know that my story is pretty rare but hopefully it gives some parents hope that you CAN date and love again, and you are not anything less because you don't have as much freedom or because you have kids. ❤️

I've been single for over a decade and it would have to be someone very special to get me to think about dating again.

I've tired OLD - horrific. Never again. I'm happy on my own and can support myself financially so I'll stay as I am for now.

ExDH left me for OW when DC were 4 and 5
I had a LDR with a different ex after a year which lasted 3 years but split due to distance (we are still friends)
started a relationship with someone else when they were 7 and 8 but didn’t introduce for a good while - eventually we lived together but it just wasn’t right and we split when DC were 15/16 (again still friends)
Sadly I’ve since given up! DC are grown up now
I always prioritised them over relationships and for me that was the best decision
now it’s my time and I might try OLD when I’m happy with me

I think you've put this perfectly. Men really aren't necessary. They're nice but often surplus to requirements!

Single now for 18 years. 0.00001% help from anyone else.

Have had a few one night stands and short relationships. I'm always surprised how pathetic a lot of men are. There is very little chance I would want a long term relationship and definitely wouldn't live with anyone.

Mine was someone I knew when we were kids. We met up again after 20 years (DD was 7 at the time and I'd been divorced for 3 years), got chatting and we're still together 24 years on. He didn't move in until 5 years ago though. He's also not lazy, no more disorganised than I am and has been a great support throughout the years.

@HuckingFellHire

Love your post and really relate to it.

Also agree with the PP who said we become weaker with a man and stronger without. That's consistently been my experience at least.

@difficultspaghetti sounds like a love story. Glad it worked out for you in the end it's so nice to hear.

my ex left me for ow , when dd1 was about 3 months old . I was single for four years , then I met a friend of a friend, who was newly single and we hit it off straight away . We have been together 20 years and have had two more dc together.

I met Now dh in a supermarket-having been divorced at that point for 4 years. We have four kids between us and so have a big old blended family. So far so good for us after awful ends to both first marriages. We both feel very lucky.

It is freedom I enjoy not some new bloke to fix me. A friend got really ill from the covid vaccines as she has fibromyalgia to the extent that she is now on PIP and awaiting a hip operation. She had already found a nice older man who had been stung by his ex and she has had nothing but bad relationships in the past. She has always been poor and neither ex paid a jot of maintenance towards her three children. She has now moved in with him as she cannot afford to live. She says he is the only good man she has ever had. I haven't known her long but pleased for her and just hope he continues to treat her properly. Luckily her three children really get on well with him too.

I met DP on OLD a year after my ex left. DS was 2.5. DS is now almost 5.5, DD is 4 months old, we have a flat together and we couldn't be happier. It can happen - there are good eggs out there. I was lucky enough to find one that wanted exactly the same things I did and DS thinks DP's the best thing since sliced bread

Taking on a new bloke and bringing him into your child/ren's lives is a risk - it may or may not work out, but it is a risk. And he may up and leave again, or you may decide the relationship isn't for you bringing further disruption to your children's lives.

Or you could end up living a happy and fulfilled life with happy children in a stable household.

Or you could end up living a happy and fulfilled life with happy children in a stable household.

I have all that, don't need a man for that.

OP I chose to stay single until mine has grown up, now he's almost grown up I still have no desire for a relationship with anyone other than myself. I'm just too selfish now I think and have lots of plans for solo adventures in the coming years. Just about to hit 50 and I'm excited about the freedoms this decade will bring, not giving that up for anyone.

A lot of my friends of similar age are utterly fed up with their partners and find them hard to tolerate during the peri menopause years. Whereas the older women in my family all seem to have ended up becoming carers for their partners and live very limited lives. That is not for me.

I met my now DH at 48. I'd been a single parent for years. I tried doing new things and going to new places - just to change the energy around me. It worked.

Thank you for all your replies. And sorry for my incredibly late response!
So lovely reading your stories and also your thoughts/opinions. I have been single a couple of years, not looking, no plans for Internet dating in the slightest. I have a good career, me and my child are settled in our new flat. And working on my goals in life. I have had time to work to do some counselling work on my self. I feel a lot more peace in my life now and contentment. With all honesty the thought still crosses my mind every now and again if I would ever meet a good man and wanted to hear some positive real life stories so thank you for sharing some of yours

I think it depends on your age. Single for 2 years so far & don't really meet men in my day to day life.

Had my children later, so they are still fairy young - 10 & 14.

I'm in my 50's & no online dating men are interested- they usually want women 10-15 years younger.

And I don't really want to live with someone again.

This is both depressing and yet true. Clear that many conclude they are better off without the drama. Following the recent breakdown of my fifth relationship where Prince charming turned into a defective asexual mute wimp, I am inclined to think it's soooo much easier not to get to embroiled and there is peace in realising everything that's good or stable in my life was built in spite of input from men and certainly not because of it.... sad but true. I trust me.

I met my now DH about 6 years after leaving my relationship with my oldest DS's father.

I also had a relationship for 3 years in between. It wasn't meant to be, he didn't want a big commitment and I did. We parted amicably.
But it made me realise that there were good men out there.
We met online in 2001, in the very early days of internet dating. I remember sending a photo through the post!

In 2004 I met DH at a local (tacky) night club for older people. We were both mid-30s when we met.

He made it very clear he did want a commitment and at the end of 2004 he proposed.
We got married in December 2005 and have 2 DCs together, now 15 and 17.
I feel extremely lucky to have him in my life.