Help me get my head round sexting

[Time4achange2]

Two people fancy each other, perhaps say flirting at work/in a social setting, take each others contact info....then randomly go on to send explicit sex chat and pics of their body parts to each other by phone/ social media etc even before a date or being in an established relationship?

Why, just why and is this an age thing such as under 40's?

I think it's disingenuous to claim that it isn't a thing that women feel pressured into this kind of thing a lot.

Look at all the discussion around revenge porn, teen girls being pressured by boys to send nudes etc. It isn't a new discussion, I'm sure there are lots of stats and studies out there about it.

Good that nobody's said that then, @aSofaNearYou .

I can't be arsed with how overly confrontational you are being on this thread. You yourself have been suggesting that it isn't reasonable to generalise that this is a common theme.

@EmmaEmerald

Showing my age what's that please?

Let's just say that the guy needs to be prepared with some tissues beforehand.

Or in the shower maybe to avoid that...

And women actually want that video?!

Oh wow, @CurlewKate your mysoginistic, outdated views are laughable. Many, many women enjoy sex. If you have have issues with morality, consent (from your comment - women going 'along' with men), modesty and excitement when it comes to sex then maybe you need t oexamine where your own moral compass came from and the messages about sex you have received over your lifetime from when you were a child to now.

@Time4achange2 - to chime in with many others, because when it's between consenting adults it's fun and exciting. Especially at the beginging of a relationship. My now DH and I were doing it over 10 years ago and believe me, neither of us a very young and WELL within the 20 year bracket to 65.

It astounds me how many women thing sex is something just for men. Sex is a wonderful experience when you feel safe and all adults are consenting, and it doesn't have to be in a LTR.

@aSofaNearYou

Don't be arsed then. Have a nice evening

To me, it moves things on too quickly. People are steady in an 'intimate' relationship before they've even been out for a coffee! So by the time they have a date, then sex is expected. That's fine for some people, but not for others.

@Allthecheeseplease "Many, many women enjoy sex. If you have have issues with morality, consent (from your comment - women going 'along' with men), modesty and excitement when it comes to sex" i have issues around consent. Not about any of the others. Interested in why you put them together....

Totally agree 👏

Yes, they do. Women will send and ask, expect whatever you can send them. Forget about the tissues.
In my house share, the landlady sent me a porn video at 11 pm on the very first week.
I was like wow she's forward. I just laughed it off rather than taking the bait.

However, sending randoms sex texts is not on.

I feel like the whole world is hyper sexual now.

consenting adults - all fine with me.

Well said.

Yup 😊

I’m absolutely into sex, but the turn-off about sexting as an idea for me is that I always envisage the writing as likely to be cringe-inducingly bad, and peppered with heavy-breathing mis-spellings and poor grammar. Which would make my libido shut up shop…

In my experience it kind of builds up, you might be talking about what you like or enjoy, then one person might admit they’re getting turned on by talking about it, the only times I’ve done it it’s with people I’ve already built up a bit of banter/rapport/friendship with then it gets flirty and onto talking about fantasies and goes from there. It’s only fun if you’re in the mood otherwise it’s really not 🤣

Well you see, 2 consenting horny adults send each other racy messages and sometimes images of their body as a way of communicating their horniness.

A think a lot of men can be very visual but words/imagination do it for me

A lot of women can be very visual too.

I think it probably is to some extent.
Everyone has a boundary.
I've not sexted with every partner, some don't like, don't participate. On the other hand, some do. Some women actively pursue it.

OP - you are judging, not just ‘trying to undertone’. It comes through very loud and clear.
Why do people do it - because it’s fun. Because the attitude to sex has changed a lot, because women are more able to acknowledge their needs and desires.
And because it’s part of being sexual - which these days isn’t limited to being in committed long term relationships.

In fact - I’d be bold to suggest that sexting is very much a courting/early relationship activity rather than something long married people would do. (As least if the people in the long relationships are living together)

Sexting too early with colleagues - may possibly not be the smartest idea as who knows where it will. But no worse than what goes on at Xmas parties really.
Sexting with people on OLD - where there is a bit more anonymity - it’s a whole different story.

What made you post this @Time4achange2 ?

But what about the SPaG??? 😀

Omg the SPAG is so important! Bad SPaG is a passion killer

Also, having said all that about words being what turns me on, I also discovered that I have something of a repressed exhibitionist in me 🤣 and seem to enjoy ‘showing’ someone else intimate things but only if I really really trust them and obviously being careful about it not being identifying